I paid off the debt for the most beautiful sisters in the school, and then they barged into my house where I live alone. “Please go back home; you don’t need to repay the favor.” “No way.” “We don’t want to~☆”

“……………………10 o’clock… This isn’t good, not today either…”

Half-asleep, I look at the alarm clock. It’s 10 a.m.—or rather, almost 11.

It’s a weekday, meaning I’m irrevocably late.

With resignation and lethargy, I bury my face in the pillow before rolling onto my back and staring up at the ceiling.

“Ah… Life really is draining, isn’t it?”

Closing my eyes, I inexplicably recall the events of my life, like a montage. Well, it’s been like this every day lately.

As I indulge in memories, my consciousness drifts into a dream.

It’s been nearly a month since Karen and Erika left.

When I wake up again, the clock’s hands have moved to the afternoon.

Even if I go to school now, the best I could hope for is making it to the closing homeroom. I feel like skipping, but I’ve been absent for four days in a row, so I should probably attend before my absence count gets dangerous.

“Well, I don’t plan on advancing my education anyway, so it doesn’t really matter…”

I’m only attending high school because I promised Mr. Izumi that I would at least finish high school, one of the conditions for receiving his help.

So, as long as I graduate, the details don’t matter. However…

“I’d rather not repeat a year due to insufficient attendance.”

I’m not sure how close I am to that point, but it would be an incredible hassle. Reluctantly, I decide to take a hot shower to wake up.

When I arrive at school, the hallway is eerily silent, and the voice of a teacher is heard from the classrooms. Clearly, homeroom is in session. My footsteps echo loudly.

Entering the classroom, the atmosphere freezes for a moment. I receive stares of curiosity from classmates and either disappointment or anger from the teacher. I ignore them and sit down. As long as I’m marked present, my standing in this room doesn’t matter.

I knew that Karen’s gaze was among those directed at me.

She has looked concerned since the first time I saw her at school after she moved out. She looks worried, like she wants to say something, but never steps over that line.

That’s fine by me. Our relationship should be this distant.

Classes will change as we move up grades, leading to further estrangement. Once we graduate, we’ll part ways for good.

I just have to endure this gaze for now. Although it does make me somewhat uncomfortable, leading me to skip school more than I should… it’s just a matter of time before everything resolves itself.

Back home, I throw my bag and uniform onto a living room chair and lie down on the sofa.

“I’m tired.”

For some reason, I feel strangely fatigued. Maybe it’s the sense of futility, or maybe it’s the hunger. After all, I haven’t eaten anything since waking up.

“Is there anything to eat?”

Unsurprisingly, the fridge is empty.

“Sigh. Convenience store, then.”

I got used to eating freshly prepared meals recently, so relying on convenience store food is rather demotivating. It’s hard to appreciate pre-packaged food when you’re accustomed to something better.

“Well, can’t complain.”

It’s a luxury to complain. I’ll get used to it eventually. Humans adapt, for better or worse.

I didn’t want to head out again immediately, so I ignore my complaining stomach, go back to my room, and start playing a video game.

It’s easy to lose yourself in a game. I play silently, forgetting the time. However, my recent performances have been less than stellar, and my online rankings have been plummeting.

Still, I keep playing, but there are times when a wave of emptiness surges over me.

It feels like there’s a hole in my heart, sucking everything into it. A moment when only futile emotions are spinning in circles.

I throw the game controller aside and lean back on the bed.

“Sigh… It’s just a matter of getting used to it.”

My senses are off because I was living with other people. I just need a little time to adjust.

If I get broken by this, I won’t be able to handle the rest of my life, spanning decades. My lonely, dull life will be unbearable.

“Alright. Let’s go buy some food.”

Being hungry only makes me feel weaker. With that thought, I finally muster the will to get up.

Walking back from the neighborhood convenience store, the surroundings have already darkened. I arrive home in an outfit that resembles pajamas and open the front door.

“Huh?”

Unfamiliar shoes are there. Only one other person has a key to this house. So, those shoes must belong to her.

Was there an emergency?

“Ah, you’re back. Welcome home. Where have you been?”

“Convenience store. What brings you here today, Ms. Higashi?”

Entering the living room, I find Ms. Higashi sitting at the table. Seriously, why is she here?

“Do I need a reason to be here?”

“You wouldn’t come to my house without reason. You’re not that idle, are you?”

“That’s true.”

Ms. Higashi nods straightforwardly. I take a seat opposite her and unpack my convenience store meal.

“I really want to hire a maid to make meals for me, given how busy I am. So what’s your take? You’ve had a maid before, right?”

“She was more of a house helper. Well, I’d say it’s pretty convenient for housework.”

“At least you wouldn’t have to eat these convenience store bento boxes with distaste, would you?”

“I don’t really mind, actually. This stuff is tasty in its own right.”

“Hmm.”

Mr. Higashi watched me with a faint smile as I continued to eat my bento box.

Sure, this yakiniku bento has overly strong flavors, and by the end, I do get a bit bored of it. I’m fully aware that it can’t match a home-cooked meal.

But what’s the point of complaining about it now?

“Chasing this junky flavor down with Coke is the best part.”

“Unhealthy, isn’t it?”

“I’m not particularly concerned with living a long life.”

As I stuffed my face and washed it down with juice, Mr. Higashi sighed deeply.

“You’re in a worse state than I thought. Your room is a mess, the sink is unused and left as is, and you’re not cleaning the house. Plus, you’re not even attending school properly? I inquired with your homeroom teacher.”

“Who asked you to go—”

“Mr. Izumi entrusted me with your care. He said to at least get you through high school seriously. I might not be your guardian, but I can give you a piece of advice, can’t I?”

It’s hard to argue against that. I understand Mr. Higashi is speaking out of goodwill, so I never planned to retort in the first place.

“What are you planning for your future if you keep this up?”

“Future? I don’t really have any plans.”

“You have money, so you’re fine? You never know when that could change. Or would you go back to your specialty, gambling, to earn money?”

Gambling, huh?

Gambling with money is prohibited where Mr. Izumi isn’t present. That was our agreement.

I don’t really know if he meant that to apply even after he died, but it’s a complicated issue.

“What can I say? Everyone faces uncertainties about their future. If life goes south, I’ll deal with it then.”

“What if something you want to do suddenly appears? Or something you want to protect?”

“For me, life is about giving up. When that time comes, I’ll simply accept it and adapt. That’s the smart way to live.”

Everyone will die eventually. You carry a plethora of risks in life and experience needless emotional turmoil, only to die in the end. It’s an equal fate for all.

Creating a family or having children is considered a standard for happiness or success. At least that’s common knowledge.

But I don’t want a family. I don’t have dreams or goals. So doing nothing is the least risky and most efficient approach.

“Smart, huh? If what you say is true, life is a dull yet risky affair.”

I think so too. Life is a terrible gamble with large risks and little return, and participation is compulsory.

I’ve just managed to recognize that fact a bit earlier than most.
“So you kicked them out because you thought they were a risk?”

The two of them—Kamishiro Karen and Kamishiro Erika.

“It’s not about them being a risk, that’s just normal, isn’t it? They have a family, and it’s only natural for them to live together. In fact, it was abnormal for them to be staying in this house.”

Why do the three of us, who are essentially strangers, need to insist on living together?

Why should I involve those sisters, and their family, in such an abnormal life?

“You said before that you aren’t like regular people, right?”

“Huh? Did I say that?”

Huh? Oh, the “I don’t know what’s normal for most people” part. That might imply that I consider myself not normal, true.

“Yeah, I might have said that. I mean, the phrase ‘I’m not normal’ might sound childish and stupid to you, Azuma-san.”

“No, I don’t think you’re wrong to perceive yourself as different from what society generally considers normal. But that’s not what I’m trying to say.”

Oh? She unexpectedly affirmed my viewpoint. Azuma-san looked troubled as she searched for her next words.

“You say you’re not normal, but then you force those two to be ‘normal,’ don’t you?”

“—”

Did I force “normality” on them? Me?

“Not really, it’s not like that.”

“But you made the judgment and the decision that ‘normally, one lives with their parents,’ right? You’re the employer, so I’m not saying that’s wrong. But doesn’t that mean that you believe it’s better to be ‘normal’?”

Being ‘normal’—conventional, social, ethical—doesn’t necessarily make life happier. Yet did I semi-coercively impose that on them? Why?

“They can live normally. Making their lives go awry by getting involved with me isn’t smart.”

“Weren’t you the one saying your way of life isn’t so wise?”

Azuma-san’s expression looked troubled, yet sad. Nevertheless, her eyes remained locked onto mine.

We’ve known each other for quite a while. I probably know what she’s trying to say.

“You’re a good lawyer, skilled at nitpicking.”

“Don’t make light of this. So what’s it going to be?”

I lightly raised both hands as if to surrender.

“As you said, my life has some issues, I admit. That’s exactly why I can’t involve people like them. But I’m satisfied with my life the way it is.”

“Hmm. You’re so strong at gambling, yet so passive when it comes to life.”

“The return is too low to even bother betting.”

“Oh really? Well, go ahead and lose the rest of your life then. Continue your peaceful, boring, and decadent life alone in this house, until you really end up all by yourself.”

A life where I’ve never won, or rather, never even challenged, will always end in a loss in the end.

It’s a slow drain, but a drain nonetheless.

As expected, Azuma-san understands me, understands my life, very well.

“… Yeah. I’ll do that.”

After Azuma-san left, I turned the game back on, but quit after less than five minutes.