Approximal Guide

“Enough. I’m having fun right now.”Then she turned her back again. Just as I was about to ask what she meant, there was a thud, and the wall cracked. Reflexively, I turned towards the sound, and with a gasp, I was pulled away. Someone’s thick arm was holding me.“Ugh—!”“Oh, this oppa is as light as a flower again.”I looked up at the owner of the thick arm that was holding me. It was Chief Hwang. She looked down at me and smiled.“What’s your number? Can I contact you personally?”No. Before I could politely refuse Chief Hwang’s sudden flirtation, there was a thud, and her face hit the opposite wall. Despite the tremendous impact, I was surprisingly unharmed in her arms.“Captain!”It was only natural. Kim Moohyuk had taken me back from her arms. Even though I was dangling like a piece of luggage, I shouted in delight at seeing him. I really need to increase my muscle mass. A man who can carry me around without any burden is not very attractive, is he?“Where did this bastard come from, interrupting while the lady is speaking?”Chief Hwang, who had hit the wall, laughed even with concrete dust falling from her hair. Every time she turned her head, there was a cracking sound. …Wow, that’s really scary. Meanwhile, Kim Moohyuk put me down on the ground and charged at Chief Hwang.Before Kim Moohyuk’s shin could hit Chief Hwang’s neck, she blocked the attack with her forearm and rotated her other arm to punch him in the abdomen. Kim Moohyuk, who was flying from the attack, used his ability to stop in mid-air. Narrowing his eyes, he pushed his tongue against the inside of his cheek and spat. The blood-mixed spit fell at Chief Hwang’s feet.“Hey… How old are you? Huh?! How old were you during the 2002 World Cup?!”…Could Chief Hwang be my age? Seeing how she can’t stand young punks acting up, she might be around my age. While feeling a sense of kinship with the enemy, I watched Kim Moohyuk. He was lifting the concrete fragments around him into the air. It was the technique he used earlier when facing the espers of the entire team.“Hmph, is scattering some dust all you got?”But it seemed our Chief Hwang didn’t even flinch. She punched the flying concrete fragments, shattering them into pieces. Watching it made me feel pain. The fragments were not just broken into pieces but turned into powder.Chief Hwang smiled and said,“Is it my turn now? If I catch you, should I apologize to the lady three times?”“Catch me first, Noona. Don’t just talk.”Kim Moohyuk smirked with a blank face. If he had openly laughed at her, she might have been less angry, but his condescending tone must have really pissed her off.“That bastard…”See, she’s pissed. Afraid of becoming collateral damage in their fight, I watched from a distance. They exchanged a few blows. Chief Hwang also threw broken concrete fragments at Kim Moohyuk like shot puts. Kim Moohyuk stopped them in mid-air and then quickly threw them back at Chief Hwang. The fragments, carrying kinetic energy, rushed towards Chief Hwang.Kim Moohyuk hid himself among the flying fragments and charged at Chief Hwang. His telekinetic ability was enhancing his body, turning him into a projectile. Kim Moohyuk’s right foot hit Chief Hwang’s solar plexus. She coughed while holding his ankle. Blood trickled down her mouth, indicating a successful hit.“You bastard…”“You curse well too?”Kim Moohyuk chuckled and used the ankle she was holding as a pivot to swing his other leg and hit Chief Hwang’s chin. She staggered, possibly from a mild concussion. No matter how you look at it, Chief Hwang seems to have body enhancement abilities. To land so many effective hits on someone like her… It made my initial worries about Kim Moohyuk’s martial arts skills seem laughable.Next was Chief Hwang’s counterattack. She grabbed Kim Moohyuk by the neck and pulled him towards her, driving her knee into his solar plexus. Kim Moohyuk coughed in pain as the knee, which looked as sturdy as steel, hit his solar plexus.I frowned. Should I just leave them like this? But Kim Moohyuk quickly regained his composure and bent Chief Hwang’s fingers back. When she faltered, he pulled her in and headbutted her nose. There was a cracking sound as the bone broke.“Damn it…”She cursed under her breath. When she lifted her head, her crooked nose bone was revealed. Chief Hwang grabbed her skewed nose bridge with both hands and roughly set the bone back in place. The grinding sound of bones made me wince. Both of them were such formidable opponents that it was hard to predict how the fight would end.I started image training to support Kim Moohyuk remotely. It was a technique only Colonel Kang used, so starting remote guiding would surely arouse his suspicion, but I couldn’t just watch Kim Moohyuk suffer. I was closely watching their fight.Someone grabbed my waist. It was so sudden that I couldn’t even let out a scream. As I was pulled into the embrace, I smelled a familiar yet strange scent. What was this scent…? I blinked in confusion. When I looked up, I saw that it was Han Jaemin who was holding me.“…Lieutenant Han…!”“Shh.”Lieutenant Han put a finger to his lips and smiled with his eyes. He whispered to me in a low voice.“It’s better to stay out of the way.”“What?”What nonsense. How can a pair guide stay out of the way when their pair esper is in a fight? I looked at Han Jaemin with a bewildered face, but he still didn’t explain why I should stay out of the way, just smiling that inscrutable smile. The familiar scent I had smelled in his arms was now ventilated into the air. …It had been a while since I last smelled it, but now was not the time for nostalgia. I shook my head and said,“How can I stay out of the way when my esper is in a fight?”“…”Han Jaemin closed his mouth at my words. Then he looked at Kim Moohyuk. It was then. A large concrete fragment that had fallen on the ground behind Kim Moohyuk flew up and rushed towards the back of his head at high speed. It didn’t seem to be Kim Moohyuk’s ability. Without thinking, I shouted with a chill running down my spine.“Kim Moohyuk! Behind you!”There was no time to call him Captain. If Kim Moohyuk hadn’t turned around at my scream and barely dodged, his head would have been smashed, no matter how tough he was. Even though he turned his head quickly, a bright red line was drawn on his temple. It was scratched by a sharp part of the fragment as he dodged.Chief Hwang didn’t miss the opportunity and grabbed Kim Moohyuk by the hair. Then she kneed his face again.“Kim Moohyuk—!”I tried to run to him, calling his name. If Han Jaemin hadn’t held me tightly, I would have. I shouted in desperation, my waist tightly held.“Let go of me!”“What are you going to do if you go now?”Without even realizing the sudden change in his tone, I struggled in Han Jaemin’s arms.“Let go of me!”“Hajung, calm down, okay?”…What? What did he just…? I stopped struggling, unable to believe what I had heard, and looked at him.“What did you just say…?”“I mean, there’s no point in going now. It’s safer with me. Captain Kim needs to focus on the fight.”Han Jaemin had already returned to his usual self, as if he had never used that tone. I quietly removed Han Jaemin’s arms from around my waist, standing straight. Behind me, Kim Moohyuk was being attacked unilaterally by Chief Hwang. The balance between the two formidable opponents seemed to be tipping in Chief Hwang’s favor as she didn’t miss the chance when Kim Moohyuk lost his rhythm.My esper was being attacked by the enemy behind me. Yet, I couldn’t help but stare at Han Jaemin. All my nerves were focused on him. It was almost like a sense of detection.“You…”“Why are you looking at me like that?”Han Jaemin smiled. He didn’t seem to care at all that Kim Moohyuk was being severely attacked. I looked at him in shock. And then it happened. Suddenly, a breeze blew from behind. I remembered Moohyuk. With a chilling feeling, I turned around.Concrete fragments were floating in the air. Kim Moohyuk was looking at me, holding one of Chief Hwang’s ankles as she lay unconscious on the ground. His smiling face was a kind I had never seen before.“Hello? I was wondering when you’d show up. I was so anxious, I almost thought I was in love with you.”Kim Moohyuk twisted Chief Hwang’s ankle 180 degrees. There was a cracking sound as ligaments and bones broke. With blood dripping from his mouth and a dirty face from the intense fight, his smile towards Han Jaemin felt like a declaration.Kim Moohyuk let go of Chief Hwang’s ankle. There was a thud as her leg fell, but she didn’t regain consciousness. He still didn’t wipe the smile off his face as he spoke.“Did you switch pairs already? Why are you standing there like an idiot? Come here.”What does he mean by standing there like an idiot in front of an instructor? Even in this situation, I frowned at his absurd way of speaking. But as Sergeant Kang, I was indeed lower in rank than Kim Moohyuk, so I had nothing to say. I was about to step towards him when Han Jaemin pulled me back into his arms.There was an inexplicable obsession in the arms that wrapped around my waist. I felt a reflexive disgust. I voiced my displeasure loudly.“What are you doing—!”But before I could properly protest, I was left speechless.“What is this…?”My body was floating in the air. If Kim Moohyuk had used his telekinesis ESP to lift me, I wouldn’t have been so surprised. I might have been annoyed that he used his ability instead of words. But there was another reason for my confusion.The telekinesis ESP waves surrounding me were not Kim Moohyuk’s. Speechless, I couldn’t even think of moving my frozen eyes like a stuffed animal. It felt like the world had disappeared, leaving only one person. The person in my sight was smiling at me.“Surprised?”Han Jaemin greeted me sweetly, as if welcoming my shocked eyes. Suddenly, a realization struck my mind. It felt like a flash of lightning through my nervous system.“…You…”Pale-faced, I stared at Han Jaemin as if he and I were the only ones left in the world. Han Jaemin turned his head away from me and waved his hand. Then he sent me floating behind him. One of Kim Moohyuk’s eyebrows shot up. He let out a hollow laugh.“Give her back. We have to go home together later, since we live together.”Han Jaemin replied in a cold tone to Kim Moohyuk, who spoke with a smirk.“Don’t be so arrogant.”Even in the tense standoff between the two espers, I couldn’t take my eyes off Han Jaemin, still in a daze. I couldn’t believe it. The ability Han Jaemin was using on me was telekinesis ESP.When Ha Seonghan had his chest torn open and lost his life to a flying stone in the past, I had tried to investigate the esper’s waves left on the blood-stained stone. Telekinesis espers were extremely rare, making them easy to track, so I thought I could find the culprit and avenge him. But the stone, which had flown with enough force to tear open an esper’s chest, was clean, as if it hadn’t been propelled by any esper waves. Losing the only evidence, I spent my time in despair.Telekinesis espers were that rare. Yet, coincidentally, both espers I was close to could use telekinesis ESP. Kim Moohyuk and… Ha Seonghan.I focused on the familiar ESP waves surrounding me from Han Jaemin. Like someone choking up, desperate for any small clue. Indeed, Han Jaemin’s telekinesis ESP waves were similar to Ha Seonghan’s. But that couldn’t be. If it were yours, if this really were your ability… Unable to bear it, I looked at Han Jaemin again.The two espers were already engaged in close combat. Han Jaemin ran first and punched Kim Moohyuk’s jaw. Kim Moohyuk, who took the hit, punched Han Jaemin’s solar plexus. They started fighting, tangled together. The sound of flesh hitting bone was loud.‘Kang Hajung, pair with me. I’m the strongest, stronger than anyone else… So choose me.’A voice from a now faint memory pierced through. Without realizing my eyes were tearing up, I kept staring at Han Jaemin. Maybe, just maybe… Did you come back to life too? Like me, who woke up in another person’s body five years after suddenly dying without warning.While I was struggling with this impossible thought, the two espers were fighting as if to kill each other. Concrete fragments surrounded by Ha Seonghan’s ESP and those sent flying by Kim Moohyuk were colliding in the air, breaking into dust. I closed my eyes tightly and opened them again.Then it happened. With a bang, the glass windows at the end of the hallway started shattering one by one. The explosion from outside the building was causing the windows to burst in sequence.“Kang Hajung—!”It was unclear who was calling me. I only knew that a desperate voice was calling my name. Both espers were running towards me at the same time. I stared at them blankly.Bang, bang, bang—! Amidst the continuous explosions, I reached out my hand. And the person I grabbed was…“Got you.”It was Kim Moohyuk. He grabbed my hand, pulled me into his arms, and held me tightly. Familiar scent, familiar warmth, and familiar ESP. In Kim Moohyuk’s embrace, I felt Han Jaemin’s gaze.“…”“…”Our eyes met in the air. Fortunately, the explosions seemed to have stopped, as no more sounds were heard. Instead, flames were slowly climbing the walls from the end of the hallway towards us.Han Jaemin stood amidst the blazing flames. With the fierce fire behind him, I couldn’t see his expression. I felt as if something irrevocable was placed between him and the two of us.“Kang Hajung.”“……”Han Jaemin called me. Even while looking at him from within Kim Moohyuk’s arms, I couldn’t find a suitable answer. I was still confused, not knowing whether to respond to Han Jaemin or to ask what his true identity was. Eventually, Han Jaemin turned his back on me.“Where are you going?”Kim Moohyuk clicked his tongue and sent a concrete fragment flying. Han Jaemin crushed it with his bare hands without even using telekinesis. Watching that, Kim Moohyuk clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. Judging by his pulsating ESP, he seemed angry enough to want to tear him apart immediately. However, Kim Moohyuk did not let go of the arm holding me. He didn’t rush towards Han Jaemin.At that moment, the building shook as if as a result of the previous explosion. The ceiling collapsed between Han Jaemin and us. An enormous cloud of dust rose. Kim Moohyuk hugged me tighter, covering my head with his arm.When the dust settled, I met eyes with Han Jaemin, who was holding Chief Hwang’s ankle with an unclear gaze. He was floating in the air above the gaping hole in the ceiling.He looked at me once, then turned around and disappeared. Looking up at the massive hole, my throat tightened, and I couldn’t even make a sound. After a long while, I managed to speak.“…Shouldn’t we go after him?”“For now.”If the other hostages were already dead, the goal of this operation was to safely escape with the people we had rescued. In fact, it was more shocking that Han Jaemin headed in the opposite direction, as if confirming my suspicions, than Kim Moohyuk letting him go.Kim Moohyuk led me as if he didn’t care what I was thinking. We had to get out quickly through the flames and dust from the explosions. Unknown chemical substances in the lab were exploding one after another as they came into contact with fire. I had thought the explosions started abruptly from outside the building, but it seemed a fire had broken out in the annex, causing the chemicals to explode. I dazedly headed towards the van with the hidden ability activated.We had parked the car a bit away from the building, but I wondered how Kim Moohyuk was able to lead me there without hesitation. Soon, I saw car lights flashing in the distance. I then remembered that I had requested backup before going back into the building. Patrol cars and military jeeps with the Esper-Guide Corps symbol were flashing their sirens around the van. Looking at the scene, I spoke with reluctance.“…You can let go now. We’re here.”I then slipped out of Kim Moohyuk’s arms. I felt his gaze on me as I limped towards the military jeep with flashing sirens to request assistance with retrieving the tank and the chimera’s corpse. I would return the chimera safely later through Byeongeun.On my way back to Kim Moohyuk, I felt conflicted again. It felt like everything I had believed in until now was collapsing.Han Jaemin, Ha Seonghan, and Han Jaemin…I couldn’t stand the thoughts swirling in my head. I walked quickly towards Kim Moohyuk. He quietly watched me with a cigarette pack in his hand. Even though the sirens were blaring around us and the headlights of the support vehicles were shining on us, I felt like I would die if I didn’t ask this question right away. I bit my lip and asked him.“What exactly is Han Jaemin’s true identity?”Kim Moohyuk didn’t answer. He just looked down at me with a calm gaze. Under the car’s headlights, his eyes looked lighter in color than usual. His unreadable eyes were staring at me intensely. Unable to wait for him to speak, I asked again.“You knew, didn’t you?”Kim Moohyuk straightened his tilted head and smiled with just the corners of his mouth. It was a smile that seemed to indicate he was in a bad mood.“Is that important?”“It is important.”Kim Moohyuk stared at me silently for a moment. Under his gaze, I felt like all my emotions were being laid bare. It was a gaze I couldn’t handle while feeling such dirty emotions.“And you…”Just as I was about to tell him not to look at me like that, Kim Moohyuk asked me instead. Narrowing his eyes, as if mocking me for not knowing my place.“And you, why is that bastard so important to you?”His question made me hold my breath involuntarily.“Why is it so important?”Kim Moohyuk asked me again, as if to remind me of his question. I saw the platoon leader of the support team sent by Kim Inhak walking towards us about ten steps behind Kim Moohyuk. But despite sensing the presence, Kim Moohyuk stood still, persistently. I swallowed dryly.“…Is it wrong to find something suspicious when the circumstances are suspicious?”At that response, Kim Moohyuk chuckled. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me towards the factory wall. I saw the platoon leader who had been approaching us from a distance hesitate. I gave him a brief nod and walked as Kim Moohyuk led. My knee, which had been overworked all day, felt swollen and stiff. Kim Moohyuk lightly pushed me against the wall, and I felt the cold surface against my back.He placed his hand next to my head, blocking my view of the people, and slightly lowered his head.“It feels like we’ve been playing word games all this time, but listen carefully because I’ll only say this once.”“…”His voice was low and calm. He looked down at me with an expressionless face, seemingly quite angry. Of course, it might be strange for me to suspect Han Jaemin. But it’s not something to get angry about, so why was he reacting this way? I just stared at him without answering, and Kim Moohyuk spoke again.“I told you before. You’re the most suspicious one here.”“…That’s…”“I can interrogate you right now. It’s easy to investigate a mere sergeant. I have plenty of evidence and authority to do so. But why do you think I’m keeping quiet?”…Well, I don’t know… I frowned, not understanding what he was trying to say. Kim Moohyuk chuckled with his mouth closed. It was a mocking laugh that made me feel bad for no reason. He then spoke as if warning me.“Stop thinking about Han Jaemin. He’s a traitor and a spy.”“…Lieutenant Han is really…”I froze as if I had received a great shock from Kim Moohyuk’s words. It seemed that Kim Moohyuk knew about Han Jaemin’s true identity and had anticipated that Han Jaemin would eventually disappear with Chief Hwang of Accent. It might have been a trap to make Han Jaemin reveal his true identity.So, among the three of us, I was the only one who thought this was really a mission to rescue the kidnapped people. It was so absurd that I almost laughed. I finally understood why Kim Moohyuk was so indifferent when he said the kidnapped victims were found dead. Kim Moohyuk’s mission goal was something I couldn’t guess right now, and rescuing the kidnapped people was just a bonus. I felt a light sense of betrayal. How could Kim Moohyuk hide all this from me? It felt so unfamiliar that I couldn’t believe it was mine.But at the same time, I realized that I was nothing to Kim Moohyuk now. The fact that I realized this in such a way was the most absurd. With a voice choked with emptiness, I asked him again.“…So, the kidnapped people, it was okay for them to die?”“I don’t know why the topic is shifting there, but they wanted to die. Their bodies had already changed to the point where they were no longer human, and they had lost the will to live, helping each other commit suicide. They quickly took their own lives after hearing about the guides you rescued.”…Like the chimeras living in the tank, their bodies must have changed so much that they couldn’t return to being human. On the other hand, it was shocking that Kim Moohyuk had allowed their suicides. If he had such a painful experience, would he also easily give up on life? I couldn’t help but think about Kim Moohyuk, who had been left without a pair guide for five years. Did you wander like I did when I lost Ha Seonghan? Or did you just want to give up on life without any regrets like them?My chest felt heavy. Too many things had happened at once. I closed my eyes tightly. For now, I had to focus on what I could do. Meet Han Byeongeun and ask about Ha Seonghan… But that was also difficult. Lieutenant Han’s betrayal, Ha Seonghan, the ability to change bodies, SWITCH, chimeras… What am I missing? It felt like the ground beneath my feet was shaking.It was devastating to find out that a friend I thought was dead had come back to life, only to be on the enemy’s side. I was dominated by the thought that I wished Han Jaemin wasn’t Ha Seonghan, that my guess was wrong.“I told you not to think about it, but now you look like you’re only thinking about that bastard.”Kim Moohyuk straightened his head. He lowered the hand that had been on the wall and looked at me with an expressionless face. I wanted to know why Kim Moohyuk suspected me and what evidence he had. But more importantly, I wanted to know about Ha Seonghan. I wanted to meet Han Byeongeun, tell him what I had learned, and ask for his advice. The weight of the documents and papers I had collected felt heavy. Even though they were just words, they felt so light that I couldn’t even notice them.Kim Moohyuk seemed to sense my wandering gaze and sighed softly.“…Don’t dig deeper into Han Jaemin. This is an order from your superior.”“But Captain…”Kim Moohyuk turned his back without listening to my protest. I bit my lip as I watched his back walking away. I saw the platoon leader, who had been waiting for our conversation to end, finally approaching Kim Moohyuk.I buried my face in my hands. It was a confusing night.* * *“…So you called me out here at this hour? Then what is this?”Han Byeongeun asked, looking down at the shovel he was holding. I gestured towards the ground with my chin. Specifically, the ground where Ha Seonghan’s urn was buried. I pulled my baseball cap down further and replied, trying my best to sound nonchalant.“You have to dig. How can I dig with this frail body?”“Sigh… I almost died making excuses about where I was going at this hour.”“Well, you didn’t die. Now hurry up and dig.”I urged Han Byeongeun without listening further. He seemed to curse at me with his eyes, but I ignored it.“By the way, the chimera’s body has been recovered and will be sent back. Surprisingly, the People’s Army is helping out.”“…That’s a relief.”I replied, pressing the brim of my cap down further. My mouth tasted bitter. It was becoming increasingly difficult to suppress the emotions trying to surface.As soon as Kim Moohyuk returned from the mission, he went straight to headquarters to report without resting. So now was the perfect time to uncover the truth. Pretending to lounge around the dorm, I slipped out as soon as night fell and called Han Byeongeun.It was almost a miracle that we managed to get into the National Cemetery at this hour. Han Byeongeun wasn’t a concealment esper, let alone a teleportation esper, so it was incredibly difficult to climb over the walls and avoid the guards to get here.“We don’t have time to chat. We need to get back to the Seogyeong Center soon.”“…Seriously, calling someone out in the middle of the night to dig. Military harassment is insane.”Han Byeongeun grumbled. He didn’t believe me when I said Ha Seonghan had come back to life. I should have shown him the evidence first, but in the chaos, I seemed to have lost the camera and the abstracts of the papers I had taken pictures of. I thought I had hidden them well, but the weight of the truth I had learned was too heavy, and I lost them. The unbelievable situation and my stupidity were painful.Han Byeongeun, who had never seen the evidence, was full of disbelief. He had accepted without question when I said my body had changed.‘Of course. Colonel, you existed in a place where I could see you directly, but Colonel Ha was seen by you, not me. I don’t trust other people’s observations.’It was a response that made me want to say, “You’re so smart.” Ignoring the grumbling guy, I had dragged him here, so I had to get something out of this. At least confirm that he was dead.“What if Colonel Ha comes to my dream asking for his leg back? My grandmother said not to dig up graves recklessly. Haven’t you watched movies, Colonel?”“Why would Seonghan ask for his leg back? He was cremated, so his leg turned to ashes too.”“Wow, isn’t that disrespecting the dead? What about Colonel Ha’s vengeful spirit?”The only good thing was that dealing with Han Byeongeun’s grumbling on the way to the National Cemetery had restored my mental state enough to make jokes. I replied indifferently.“Korean ghosts are weak against authority, so if you say ‘By royal decree,’ they’ll back off. By royal decree, Colonel Kang Hajung orders you to dig up Ha Seonghan’s grave.”“Not funny.”“Do you think I’m doing this to make you laugh, Han Byeongeun?”Han Byeongeun’s childish behavior made me feel deflated. I understood why Han Byeongeun didn’t believe me. Being called out in the middle of the night to hear that his friend’s urn might not be buried here must have been absurd.Despite that, the only reason Han Byeongeun was listening to me was because I had been deeply troubled after losing Ha Seonghan. Back then, I always did absurd things, and Han Byeongeun silently endured those ridiculous actions by my side. Even now, he probably just wanted to humor me.“Sigh, at least it’s an urn, so it wasn’t buried too deep. I moved the headstone, but… Did you see the centipede under the headstone earlier? I almost fainted.”“Byeongeun, if you’re going to talk, at least move your hands while you do it.”It was while I was bickering with Han Byeongeun, who wasn’t taking my words seriously.“Oh, I think I’ve dug it up.”Han Byeongeun lowered himself to look at the ground, where the shovel had hit something. I shone the flashlight I was holding on the ground. A white urn covered in dirt appeared.“…Open it quickly.”“Me?”“Who else, me?”“Has this guy grown up a bit over the past few years to the point where he dares to talk back to me?” Glaring at him, Han Byeongeun grumbled as he opened the lid. Just as he complained about the urn being tightly sealed, it happened.“Uh…”“…”Han Byeongeun looked at me in surprise. But I couldn’t focus on his gaze. The urn was empty.“…They didn’t even put anything inside…? I could definitely feel the weight back then…”I muttered in disbelief. I had held Ha Seonghan’s urn. After digging the grave, I placed the urn in it myself, and everyone who knew Ha Seonghan threw dirt on top of his urn with a shovel. I saw it all with my own eyes. But the urn was empty.Raindrops started to fall on the brim of my cap with a soft patter. Suddenly, it began to rain. I told Han Byeongeun to cover the urn. Then I turned and walked away.“Colonel—!”Han Byeongeun called out to me. But I couldn’t answer and walked unsteadily. I felt like I was going to be sick.Then what were those? What were the things I had seen? The blood of Ha Seonghan that soaked my hands? The times I wandered, unable to believe that Ha Seonghan was no longer in this world?My mind was blank. The rain began to pour heavily. Han Byeongeun kept calling out to me and shouting something, but I couldn’t hear him, nor could I respond. If there had been something inside the urn, if the DNA analysis had finally revealed that it didn’t match Ha Seonghan, I wouldn’t have been so stunned.The rain pounded on my skin. My already soaked body couldn’t feel the coldness of the raindrops. I only began to perceive the rain by the pressure it applied to my skin.Ha Seonghan, and Han Jaemin.I looked up at the pitch-black sky in a daze. The rain hit my eyes so hard that I had to close them.The problem was that I had no one to confide this confusion to. Han Byeongeun had been suddenly called to join an emergency research team early in the morning.‘…For now, just stay put. I’ll look into it more. I’m the one who remembers Colonel Ha’s funeral clearly. You were out of it that day, Colonel. We definitely received the urn at the crematorium.’Han Byeongeun was right. Throughout Ha Seonghan’s funeral, I couldn’t focus on anything except moving his urn. It was a day with heavy rain. All I remember is barely holding on.‘And… it’s best not to mention to the center head that Han Jaemin is Ha Seonghan for now.’When I looked as if asking why, Han Byeongeun hesitated before speaking.‘…Lately, a lot of people have been paying attention to you, Colonel. You suddenly woke up after the suicide incident, and your guide rating went up. People find it strange.’I couldn’t argue with that. I hadn’t realized such rumors were circulating. I thought I’d avoided gossip by dismantling Team 12, but that wasn’t the case.‘I’ll be back soon. Don’t stir things up and get in trouble. Just stay put… And don’t think about Moohyuk for now. Just rest. You look really pale.’After my worried friend was dispatched on an emergency mission, I could finally return to the dorm I shared with Kim Moohyuk in the morning, when others were starting their day. It was a relief that Han Byeongeun dropped me off at Garam-dong, even though he was busy. My body felt incredibly heavy.“…”After walking a bit, I took out my phone from my tactical vest pocket when I saw the dorm mansion in the distance. The phone was wet from the rain. Hesitating, I turned it on. Although it was a cheap one, it seemed to be water-resistant enough to turn on without issue. As soon as the phone’s system booted up, numerous missed call notifications flooded in.“…”I stared blankly at the screen. All the notifications were from Kim Moohyuk.…Seeing the pile of missed calls made me think a lot. Right after finishing the process of escorting the kidnapping victims to the shelter, I called Han Byeongeun and went down to the National Cemetery without informing the guy who went to report the incident. Thinking about how the guy would have looked for me after returning to the dorm made me feel heavy-hearted. My clothes were still damp from the rain. Han Byeongeun had given me a blanket from his car, but it was useless since I hadn’t changed out of my wet clothes.The less than 200 meters felt incredibly far. I thought my heavy steps were just a feeling, but my body seemed to be overworked. My knee began to ache. The very knee that had crumbled the day Ha Seonghan died manifested the same pain as before. I stopped and let out a hollow laugh.“…Life is so damn complicated.”There was no other way to express my feelings more accurately. As soon as I acknowledged my physical state, I became even more dazed. I barely managed to unlock the front door of the dorm and step inside.“…”The dorm was quiet, with the sensor lights on in the entrance. Kim Moohyuk wasn’t there. …I thought he’d be inside… I had no answer for where I’d been if he asked, but it felt odd not to find Kim Moohyuk there. I felt empty and hollow.“…Maybe I’m getting old. My body is young, but this feels strange…”Muttering to myself, I slowly walked into the bathroom. It was only when I started taking off my wet clothes that I realized I had been shivering all this time. My whole body was trembling with chills. I thought about soaking in hot water for a long time, but I lacked the time and mental energy to fill the bathtub and sit there.With a sigh, I turned on the shower and stood under the water for a while. The water stung as it hit my skin. Where had Kim Moohyuk gone? He must have spent the night awake on the mission and hadn’t slept a wink either… Then I realized I had been thinking more about Kim Moohyuk than Ha Seonghan.I was more worried about Kim Moohyuk, an S++ grade esper, losing sleep over a mission, than my friend who had come back to life and become a military enemy. I didn’t understand myself.“Sigh…”I sighed involuntarily. I quickly washed up and thought about drying my hair with a hairdryer but felt too lazy. I just towel-dried my wet hair. I should eat something before sleeping, but my mouth felt too dry to swallow anything. I just wanted to sleep. It seemed fine to sleep until I heard back from Han Byeongeun, who said he’d look into things himself.I went into my room and lay under the covers. I would think about everything after I woke up. I needed to investigate what had happened to Ha Seonghan, what exactly the SWITCH ESP ability was, and discuss Ha Seonghan’s existence with Kim Inhak after consulting with Han Byeongeun.That should provide some clarity. But what about Kim Moohyuk? He seemed to doubt my true identity. He never truly believed that Sergeant Kang had woken up and was living with lost memories. Kim Moohyuk had a sharp intuition. But I couldn’t easily reveal my identity now. Knowing that I felt betrayed rather than joyful when I discovered Ha Seonghan was alive made it impossible to tell Kim Moohyuk the same.Well, the bigger issue with Ha Seonghan was his possible connection to Accent, but even so, he had hidden his identity and had no contact for years. I feared Kim Moohyuk would feel the same betrayal. That fear was laughable. I had never thought this way before. I only felt pity for Kim Moohyuk being left alone and planned to retire after finding him a suitable guide. But today, after experiencing the same betrayal, I feared Kim Moohyuk would feel it too. Yes, I was scared of Kim Moohyuk despising me. It was shocking that this troubled me more than thoughts about Ha Seonghan.How was Ha Seonghan alive? His ESP waves were undeniably his. The heavy urn being empty, Han Jaemin’s familiar way of speaking, the unforgettable ESP waves, and the title of the paper… all pointed to one truth.Han Jaemin was Ha Seonghan.“…”I blinked, lying there with wet hair. I eventually drifted off. The toll of staying up all night was significant. Just as I started dozing off, it happened.“Wake up.”“…”“Take your medicine and go back to sleep.”Someone sounded very annoyed. My heavy body resisted waking up, but I had to open my eyes. The voice belonged to Kim Moohyuk. I didn’t understand why he was suddenly angry. My whole body ached as if I had been beaten, and I couldn’t even groan. I just frowned silently. My consciousness kept fading. I tried to shake off the large hand on my shoulder, but it was just a feeble movement of my fingers.“Leave…”The words came out sharp. I couldn’t help it. My body felt like it was burning, and I was in too much pain to think straight. Kim Moohyuk clicked his tongue and left something on the console next to the bed before leaving. It was probably medicine and water. When the sound of him moving in the living room stopped and the bathroom door opened faintly, I managed to lock the door. Then I crawled back under the covers.I briefly regretted not taking the medicine he left. The pain was one thing, but I didn’t want to ignore his gesture. But once I lay down, inertia set in, and I didn’t want to get up. I felt no motivation.I fell asleep and woke up in the middle of the night. Thirsty, I grabbed the water glass on the table. After drinking it all, I remembered the medicine but just lay back down. I had to sleep again. When I woke up slightly later, it was bright outside. I wondered how long I had slept but couldn’t focus and just blinked before falling asleep again.I woke up startled by a loud noise. The next thing I noticed was the light in the room. Kim Moohyuk had broken through the door I had locked.“…What is it?”“Get up. Don’t make me say it twice.”Kim Moohyuk spoke through gritted teeth. He didn’t give me a chance to get up before yanking off the covers and pulling me up by the back of my neck.“What are you—”“Why didn’t you take the medicine? You always manage to do the most foolish things.”Who made who like this? I felt wronged, but my throat was too dry to speak much. I coughed, trying to adjust to the suddenly bright room. My eyes weren’t used to the light, and it was painful. Above me, Kim Moohyuk’s voice came down like a judgment, firm and unyielding.“Wash with lukewarm water. You need to bring the fever down.”“…I’ll get better if I just sleep.”Kim Moohyuk responded as if he had been waiting for that, almost cheerfully.“Is that so? Fine, you sleep. I’ll wash you myself.”What? I looked at Kim Moohyuk in disbelief, but he seemed serious. Before he could act on his words, I had to get up, albeit shakily. When I stumbled from dizziness, Moohyuk clicked his tongue and supported my waist, helping me out of the room. I wanted to walk on my own, but without his support, I couldn’t manage. I had no choice but to lean on him, resting the back of my head against his chest. It wasn’t intentional; I felt like I would collapse otherwise.He supported me without a word. His embrace was firm and warm, and despite being the one with the fever, I wanted to stay close. I groaned, rubbing the back of my head against his chest. I felt his pectoral muscles twitch in surprise, but I was too out of it to apologize for the inconvenience.“…Wash up. Lukewarm water, for a long time.”“It’s cold…”“It’s cold because you have a fever.”Kim Moohyuk looked down at me calmly, as if he would indeed wash me himself if necessary. Unable to argue, I went into the bathroom. It took a long time to undress. Even after I was naked, I was shivering too much to turn on the shower.Then it happened. Bang—! The door shook as Kim Moohyuk kicked it and shouted a warning.“Why don’t I hear water running?”…What a scary guy. I had no choice but to step into the shower and turn on the water. Even with hot water, I was shivering, but I adjusted the temperature to lukewarm, fearing his wrath. Standing under the water, my teeth chattered from the cold. Normally, colder water would be better for reducing a fever, but it seemed Kim Moohyuk had compromised with lukewarm water.I wanted to finish quickly, but my body wouldn’t cooperate. I barely managed to wash my hair and soap up before rinsing off. After brushing my teeth, I turned off the water and dried myself with a towel.“Your clothes are outside.”How did he know I was done? He even left clothes outside the bathroom. Sighing, I opened the door slightly, only to see a dark figure.“What, hey…”It was Kim Moohyuk. He handed me the clothes without a word. I thought about covering myself but didn’t have the energy. The narrow gap in the door wouldn’t show much anyway.“I’m waiting here in case you collapse. Just get dressed.”Kim Moohyuk’s voice was full of irritation. As soon as I took the clothes, he slammed the door shut.“Why is he so angry…”Kim Moohyuk had plenty of reasons to be angry. He had ordered me not to dig into Han Jaemin and went to report to headquarters, only to find me missing and not answering calls. It must have felt like insubordination. Plus, after staying up all night and finally coming home, he found me sick and couldn’t even question me. I understood his frustration.Despite his grumbling and irritation, he was kind enough not to scold a sick person. Given our rank difference, he could have just ordered me to report what I had been doing, but he gave me time to wash up. If that’s not kindness, what is?Thinking about it made me more curious about the years Moohyuk spent without a guide. I had heard about his time alone, knew how he lived, but seeing him now made me wish I had been there to comfort him. I knew his pain best, having experienced it myself. I had no words to offer, knowing how painful betrayal felt.Sighing, I slowly got dressed and stepped out. As soon as I opened the door, I almost collapsed, but Kim Moohyuk’s strong arm caught me. I smiled weakly.“…You were right, Captain. I almost fell.”“…”Kim Moohyuk looked down at me without a word. Dizzy, I couldn’t look up at him and just rested my cheek against his chest, panting. The chills had subsided, but I was still too weak to stand on my own.I had no choice but to hug Kim Moohyuk’s waist. Holding onto his solid frame, I stood silently, listening to his heartbeat thumping beneath his thick chest muscles. Why is his heart beating so fast? Is it tachycardia? Even in my dazed state, I couldn’t help but wonder. His heartbeat was so loud and rapid.I opened my mouth to ask why he was acting this way but gave up. No words came out. Something kept pressing against my lower abdomen, heavy and hard, making it slightly uncomfortable to be held. But I didn’t think to ask what it was or to leave his embrace. I just closed my eyes to endure the dizziness. Kim Moohyuk’s voice, low and rough, spoke above me.“…Eat the porridge and take the medicine.”“My throat is too sore…”“Damn it, do you want me to feed you?”He grumbled irritably. With my face against his chest, his voice resonated through his chest, making a humming sound. I felt a bit wronged.“…Why are you suddenly angry…? My throat hurts too much to swallow anything.”His voice grew even rougher, which puzzled me. But I didn’t have the energy to question it, so I just kept quiet. Moohyuk sighed and lifted me up. Normally, I would have told him to put me down, but I couldn’t move, so I just rested my forehead against his collarbone and closed my eyes. Even with my forehead against his collarbone, his heartbeat felt loud.Clicking his tongue, Kim Moohyuk carried me to my bedroom and set me on the bed before leaving the room. Leaning against the headboard, I panted for breath. Soon, he returned with a tray. I began to smell the savory aroma I hadn’t noticed when heading to the bathroom. It seemed like Kim Moohyuk had made porridge.When did he make this? I blinked, just staring. He placed the tray on the console and sat on the bed, holding the bowl of porridge to feed me.“I can eat by my—”“Just eat. I’m not holding back my anger for nothing.”…But you’re already angry enough. I thought that but didn’t say it. I quietly opened my mouth like a baby bird. My lips must have been chapped because the slightly hot spoon stung when it touched them.“…It hurts, but bear with it. You’ll get better if you eat.”He sounded like a grandfather. Eating and getting better aren’t directly related, but he said it would help. Still, I appreciated his effort to make abalone porridge to help a sick guide, so I mustered the strength to swallow the food. My throat felt swollen, and each swallow was like swallowing sharp needles. But knowing he had just returned from a mission and probably wanted to rest, I didn’t want to trouble him more, so I ate diligently.“I made a whole pot, and you eat like a bird.”Despite his effort, the result seemed disappointing. But I was too exhausted to eat more and just sat there catching my breath. Seeing I wouldn’t eat more, Kim Moohyuk clicked his tongue and handed me a cup of water and some pills. I wanted to take them without causing more trouble, but my lips wouldn’t close properly. Water dribbled down my chin. Kim Moohyuk wiped it away without a word, then placed the dishes back on the tray and stood up. The pills left a bitter taste in my throat.“Don’t lie down.”I didn’t respond, but my mind was full of complaints about why I couldn’t lie down. Sitting up was draining my energy. Even adjusting my posture was difficult. Lying down felt impossible. By the time he returned from putting the dishes in the sink, I still hadn’t managed to lie down. Struggling to lie down, I saw Kim Moohyuk leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed, watching me with a smirk.“Every time you don’t listen, I feel like you’re testing me.”Then he walked over. I muttered in frustration.“It’s not a test…”He pulled me up by the arm and sat against the headboard, pulling me into his lap. Though my fever had gone down, his warm embrace felt comforting. I was glad to be held by Kim Moohyuk, who always had a high body temperature.Resting the back of my head against his chest, I relaxed completely. Leaning against his solid chest and abs, I breathed slowly.As I lay there, sleep gradually overtook me. I didn’t even think to fight my drooping eyelids. Kim Moohyuk pressed his lips to my neck and sniffed like a big dog.“What are you doing…”His soft lips touched my neck, and his breath tickled. He rubbed his high nose against my neck, as if knowing my carotid artery was there.Half-asleep, I mistook everything happening for a dream. I easily believed everything happening on this bed was a dream, including Kim Moohyuk’s murmured words against my neck.“When you’re sick, you don’t even think to hide it. What if I notice?”“…”“Weren’t you hiding it well?”