Berserk : The Deviant

[Guts] 

Two days after facing and killing Adon and 200 Tudor soldiers and mercenaries, Guts finally opened his eyes in a tent.

Once again, Ros was present with him in the bunk while they were naked because she took care of him in addition to warming him up. Like last time, she saw him wake up and didn't say anything. 

Guts: Ros ? Where am I ? 

"Finally awake ?! We are at the large troop camp where you are being treated after your little feat against two hundred men. How do you feel ?" She asked him tenderly, Ros was greedy and provocative but she had always taken care of him as Barkha had asked her. 

"I thought it was really the end for me there, at one point I no longer knew what was happening around me there. There was only me, my sword and my rage against these cowards.

Ros, i was in a state of rage where I was truly one with my sword but if you were here, I could have attacked you too. This state… it's scary and… where is my sword, Ros ?" he asked looking around. 

Ros: Given your condition despite Judeau's miracle drug, you were at risk of being non-operational for the rest of the campaign so-(interrupted) 

Guts: What ? I WANNA CONTINUE, THESE INJURIES DON'T-(interrupted) 

"I know… I know, Guts. That's why I sent your sword for repair, it would have broken against a certain level of shock given its condition so calm down." She interrupted him by putting her finger on one of his chest wounds as Guts apologized in pain.

Outside, several other hawks who heard Guts scream knew he was awake, it was Casca and the others but Casca asked them to let them talk quietly first. However, for some reason Casca wanted to know what they were saying to each other. 

Ros : Listen, I've been thinking a lot and especially after seeing your condition last time. After this campaign to take back Doldrey from Tudor, I'm going to leave the hawks and go back to your big brother. Griffith is good but his ambition costs lives so when I thought you were dead in that forest, I... What would I have said to your brother ? Would I have told him I let you die for someone else's dream ? I know he's your friend, he's like a brother to you but-(interrupted) 

"I know, I've thought about it before and this is also my last campaign with the hawks. I'm going to leave after we're done with Tudor, I realize I've lost sight of my dream and my goals. Next to him (Barkha) I feel like I've accomplished nothing for my goals in recent years." He said and Ros sighed in relief.

When Casca heard this outside, her face became serious for some reason she didn't know yet. She pretended she hadn't heard anything and went to report a Griffith that Guts had woken up.

Ros and him talked a bit more when Griffith entered the tent and there was silence for a few seconds before Ros got up to get dressed, she told him she was going to get him something to eat since he must be really hungry. 

Guts:… 

"Ros, that girl is really attached to you and she hasn't left your side for two days. Even I feel jealous…" Griffith said smiling. 

Guts: She's doing what she promised my big brother, he's someone she really admires. 

"I think I would have admired him as much as she did if I had been with someone like Barkha…" Griffith said and Guts looked at him silently, he knew about Barkha. 

Guts: I would have told you sooner or later but I underestimated your understanding.

"I've known that for a while now, you don't have to worry. And then, I kind of admire him too. It's really funny that the only two men to beat me in one way or another are brothers ahah" Griffith finished laughing like a child and Guts shook his head smiling. 

Griffith: You really scared us my friend, I'm glad you survived. Now for the rest of the campaign, I order you to rest. I was absent from the war council meeting and the king was understanding but I have to go. 

Guts: You order me !? Do you think I'm going to get in your way ? 

"I don't want to lose you so stupidly, your injuries are no joke and it's a miracle that you survived. Do you understand that ? You're my only true friend Guts. " Griffith said as he placed both his hands on the sides of Guts' face while looking him in the eyes, as if he wanted to kiss him. 

Guts: I'm fine, I'm fine and you can see it. 

"Did I ever tell you about the time a child under 10 died on a battlefield for me ? To follow my dream? Did I tell you how far I went to not make his sacrifice and those of others useless, although I didn't feel guilty for those who stupidly threw away their lives for my dream ?" Griffith asked a silent Guts before telling him exactly what Casca told Guts in the main reality, the kid and his articulated knight toy, his prostitution to Governor Gennon in Tudor to take care of his troops financially and avoid unnecessary battles, he told him this from his point of view in much more detail and many other anecdotes that shocked Guts.

Griffith : Your look, as if I had become repulsive to you but I understand you, I would certainly have had the same look. You must know that-(interrupted) 

"It is not disgust but compassion, I understand that after all that... all these sacrifices you can no longer back down and all the other hawks, so happy to risk their lives and youth to follow you have become like acquired... no, bars of a cage that prevents you from doing anything other than what you do. In the end, you are isolated...jailed " Guts said while placing his hand on Griffith's shoulder whose eyes became moist. 

Griffith : Do you understand why I care so much about you? You are my one and only true friend, the only one who understands me and thanks to whom I am not alone... I cannot let you die, I will not allow it. Here are our choices, we will recover Doldrey without you or we'll leave this opportunity to the other armies while waiting for you to be in much better condition.

"So let's wait, Doldrey is a fortress that is said to be impenetrable and it's defended by the army of the blue whale but especially by that of the Purple Rhinoceros, the second strongest army of Tudor after that of my brother and we're lucky that he had other interests elsewhere.

I can assure you that apart from us, no one has what it takes to take it back and you know that well. " Guts said confidently to Griffith who only smiled at him and he knew that the latter already had a plan. The swordsman asked Griffith if he already had a preliminary plan for Doldrey and they had a long discussion. 

Ros was taking some stew for Guts near his isolated tent where she made her fire when Casca arrived to tell her that she wanted to talk to her but Ros told Casca that she didn't have time.

"I heard your conversation with Guts, I know what you want to do after the campaign and I don't agree with it..." Casca said to Ros who was already leaving but stopped her steps upon hearing that, she turned to look at Casca before walking towards her. 

Ros: What did I tell you before the last battle when they surprised us ? 

Casca: That day, I just wanted-(interrupted) 

Ros: WHAT DID I TELL YOU? 

"That...that I would end up dying needlessly or that I would get in the way to the point of getting someone killed because of my condition...I just wanted to be useful to Griffith." Casca said to Ros who got closer. 

"See? That's your problem, your obsession with Griffith even if it means putting others or himself in danger. Would it have killed you to point out your condition to him and for him to know that at least one of you is capable of withdrawing when necessary ?

Guts isn' t the type to let a comrade die stupidly despite everything you have spat in his face since we arrived in this gang and he almost died because of you. I would have killed you myself if his heart had stopped beating. 

You have not stopped looking for trouble for him since he arrived but now you feel so concerned about the direction we want to take? Who do you think you are? " Ros asked her with an anger that no one in the gang had ever seen because Ros was always defiant and relaxed most of the time.

Casca remained silent in the face of all this and Ros simply turned to leave, she looked at Judeau sitting on the branch where he was chopping wood and she sincerely thanked him for his cure while Judeau told her not to hold it against Casca too much but Ros just continued on her way. 

Three days later in Doldrey, a troop of wounded soldiers belonging to the blue whale that Adon had taken under his command arrived there and they were interrogated.

After the defeat on the four-sided hill, the commander escaped and abandoned them.

They were taken prisoner for a while but eventually escaped when they had the chance, several were killed but although wounded, they had managed to reach Doldrey but did not want to go home, that they wanted to fight for what was done to them.

Boscogn himself congratulated them for their courage and they were taken to treatment.

When Guts was able to walk again, he was brought back his repaired sword and one evening while he was sitting on top of a hill watching the gang's camp and the multiple campfires, Casca joined him to talk with him and they had exactly the same discussion as in the main reality.

She wanted to bring up the subject of his departure but she preferred to keep quiet thinking about what Ros had reproached her for, she didn't feel she had the right to ask him that. 

She wanted to talk about other things but Pippin, Judeau and the others came to get Guts to come drink with them and he followed them. That evening, they really had a party in his honor, he had become the legend who killed more than 200 men in a fight while being wounded .

Griffith was also there and joined them as they begged Guts to tell them in detail what had happened in that forest. He began his narration and the others began to gather around him to listen.