Hu Tao Is Monetizing My Existence.

Twisting and turning through the city streets, the group soon arrived at a quieter, more secluded part of Liyue.

Unlike the bustling shops and stalls of the main marketplace, Wangsheng Funeral Parlor was tucked away in a remote corner. If one wasn't specifically looking for it, they might never even notice it was there.

The pallbearers carrying the coffin headed toward the back entrance, while Hu Tao led Jiang Bai toward the storefront at the front.

"Since we're in the funeral business, our location is a bit out of the way," Hu Tao explained.

Jiang Bai nodded in understanding.

There was no need for Wangsheng Funeral Parlor to be in a busy commercial area. Rent for prime locations would be sky-high, and besides, most businesses wouldn't want a funeral parlor as their neighbor. After all, many people were superstitious about death.

A more secluded location wasn't a bad thing.

The front door of the parlor was slightly ajar. Hu Tao pushed it open and dashed inside, throwing her arms wide.

"I'm home!"

Instead of being greeted by a crowd of undertakers eagerly welcoming her back, she was met with the sight of a single young man sitting at a table, quietly sipping tea.

The man looked up, raising an eyebrow slightly before offering a polite smile.

"Finished with work, Director Hu?"

He wore a dark brown robe adorned with intricate golden dragon-scale patterns. His long hair was tied back with a simple ribbon, cascading down his back. A golden earring hung from one ear, and a jade ring rested on his thumb.

His refined demeanor made it clear—this was someone of wealth or high status.

Even though he was merely sitting there, his presence carried a natural gravitas that made people instinctively cautious in his presence.

Of course, none of that worked on Hu Tao.

Seeing him, Hu Tao looked genuinely surprised. She plopped into the chair across from him, resting her chin on one hand.

"Huh? Zhongli, you're actually here? I thought you'd be out drinking tea and watching opera again."

"I just returned from the opera house," Zhongli replied calmly, finishing his tea. His gaze shifted past her, landing on Jiang Bai.

"And this is…?"

He had, of course, seen Jiang Bai before—just a few days ago.

But back then, Jiang Bai had been nothing more than a lifeless, pale corpse.

Now, here he was, full of color and very much alive.

Clearly, something had happened that he was unaware of.

"Oh, this is that body we saw the other day! But right when we were carrying him up the mountain, he suddenly sprang back to life—bam! He kicked open the coffin lid and scared the pallbearers half to death!"

Hu Tao's retelling was animated, complete with exaggerated gestures and sound effects.

Zhongli's gaze lingered on Jiang Bai's face, curiosity flickering in his golden eyes.

"Dead… and now alive?"

Jiang Bai tensed for a brief moment under Zhongli's scrutiny.

His instincts screamed that this man was incredibly dangerous—absolutely not someone to provoke.

But he quickly relaxed.

There was no hostility in Zhongli's gaze.

"An unusual occurrence."

Zhongli seemed mildly intrigued but not particularly surprised. After all, he had witnessed far too many strange phenomena in his lifetime—this was hardly the most bizarre.

"Alright, let me introduce you two!" Hu Tao grabbed Jiang Bai and shoved him forward.

"Old man, this is Jiang Bai—he's officially part of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor now! He's forgotten a lot of things, so keep an eye on him, will ya?"

"Jiang Bai, this is Mister Zhongli—he's our guest consultant. He knows everything. If you've got questions, just go to him!"

Jiang Bai extended a hand without hesitation, flashing a bright smile.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mister Zhongli. I'll be relying on your guidance in the future."

Zhongli shook his hand briefly, taking the opportunity to discreetly examine Jiang Bai's aura.

For a moment, his expression froze—just slightly.

Then, he smiled faintly.

"If you have any questions, feel free to ask."

"Great! Now that we're all acquainted, let's go check out your room!" Hu Tao declared, dragging Jiang Bai toward the back of the building.

As he watched the two disappear into the courtyard, Zhongli sighed softly and shook his head.

But his gaze lingered on Jiang Bai's retreating figure, his eyes narrowing slightly with an unreadable expression.

...

From the outside, Wangsheng Funeral Parlor didn't seem very large.

But stepping inside, Jiang Bai quickly realized that the place occupied far more space than expected.

Some of the rooms were open, revealing freshly lacquered coffins inside, their scent of tung oil still lingering in the air.

In other rooms, undertakers were busy crafting funeral items.

As they walked, Hu Tao began her introduction.

"You already know what we do, but I still gotta give you the full rundown!"

"Ever since I became the 77th Director, I've been dedicated to making Wangsheng Funeral Parlor the ultimate one-stop funeral service provider!"

"We offer custom-made coffins, tailored burial robes, and all kinds of funeral supplies—wreaths, incense, paper offerings, you name it! We handle cremations, burials, water burials, fire-and-water burials, fire-and-earth burials—every funeral service you can think of!"

"Oh, and I'm also planning to launch special promotions—buy-one-get-one-free funerals, seasonal discounts, bulk service packages… the whole deal!"

Jiang Bai listened intently, completely intrigued.

"Buy-one-get-one-free? How does that work? And what exactly is a fire-and-water burial?"

Hu Tao counted on her fingers as she explained.

"You, for example, were supposed to be my test case! But your situation isn't something I can apply to others."

"As for buy-one-get-one-free, I'm still working out the details! Should it be 'buy one coffin, get one free'? Or 'buy a coffin, get a free urn'? Or maybe even 'buy a funeral, get another one free'… Still crunching the numbers on that one!"

Jiang Bai's brain kicked into gear.

"What if it's 'buy one coffin, get a free burial robe'?" he suggested.

Technically, the promotion didn't specify what the second item had to be.

Because honestly… offering two full funerals for the price of one?

That was just bad business sense.

"That's a good idea! Or maybe we could offer a discount card—next time they come back, they get 20 or 30% off!"

"And what exactly is a fire-and-water burial? Or a fire-and-earth burial?"

"Oh, those are pretty much exactly what they sound like." Hu Tao explained matter-of-factly. "At Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, we fully respect the wishes of the deceased. For example, if someone wanted their ashes scattered into the sea, we'd cremate them first, then carry out their wish by spreading their remains into the ocean. If someone wanted to return to the earth, we'd bury their ashes in the ground instead."

As she spoke, a new idea suddenly struck her.

"Ooh! What if we started offering a 'Returning to One's Roots' service? We could deliver a person's ashes back to their homeland—or maybe to a place they always wanted to visit! Of course, they'd have to book it in advance, or else we wouldn't know where to send them after they're gone."

The more Hu Tao thought about it, the more excited she became.

"Liyue Harbor is home to so many adventurers and foreigners—there's definitely a market for this! We could promote it to adventurers, offering to take care of their final arrangements if anything happens to them. This could be huge!"

Sure, pitching this idea to people while they were still alive might earn them some glares or even get them kicked out, but if anyone really stopped to think about it, this was actually a brilliant service!

A lot of adventurers died in remote, unknown places, their last wishes unheard, their bodies left to rot or be devoured by wild beasts.

But if they registered with Wangsheng Funeral Parlor beforehand, they could ensure that their remains were retrieved and returned—whether to family, friends, or even scattered into the wind and sea.

"Genius! Absolute genius!" Hu Tao grinned.