I Am Not a Robot. Beep-bop

Chapter 56: It’s Work, Alice 1

A week had passed since I came to Saya Guild.

At first, I wasn’t used to “playing” with the children, but I gradually became more adept.

On the first day, it took me over half a day, but yesterday, I managed to play with them for just about three hours, enough to satisfy them.

Of course, adapting was pure hell.

Most of the girls wanted battles and hunts disguised as play, but there were over ten of them who insisted on running around the walls and ceilings, playing tag non-stop for 24 hours.

Although they all looked similar, in reality, their appearances, preferences, and personalities were completely different.

“Yawn, good morning.”

【Good morning, human.】

I don’t have a body that feels fatigue.

As long as I have energy, I function, and thanks to some strange magical engineering, even if screws and clockwork mechanisms are broken, my body reconstructs itself.

There’s no such thing as feeling tired, nor does sleep relieve any fatigue that doesn’t exist.

However, the human mind dwelling in me hasn’t let go of its old habits, so when exposed to real sunlight, I yawned without realizing it.

Habits are terrifying.

【Current time: 7:38 AM. Temperature: 3°C. Humidity: 87%. UV index: strong. Southwestern wind.】

“You give weather forecasts too? They didn’t do that in Ark, did they?”

【To clarify, Ark doesn’t have what you’d call a climate.】

“Oh, right.”

The sun and moon there were artificial.

Manipulating climate, including humidity and temperature, wouldn’t be difficult.

The first thing to do after waking up was to take a shower.

I removed the suit I had worn instead of pajamas and stepped into the shower room, feeling the slightly cool air on my skin sensors.

While I don’t produce impurities like a human, dust or odors can cling to my artificial skin while I sleep, so it doesn’t hurt to wash.

It’s also a matter of feeling refreshed.

Besides, unlike Ark, this place has warm water and even luxury items like shampoo and body wash, so not showering feels like a waste.

Enjoy it while I can.

In Ark, water costs are exorbitantly high, with only cold water available. You’d often have to collect your daily water in advance, and if you exceeded a certain amount, your supply might be cut off without warning.

Here, since the water comes from underground, I can use as much as I like without worrying about shortages.

“This is unnie’s room!”

“No, it’s Teacher’s!”

“The Guild Leader said to call her Teacher.”

“Teacher?”

“Sensei?”

While I was showering, I heard the voices of the girls.

They must have wandered into my room while playing tag, climbing walls and ceilings.

“Eek!?”

“Ah! It’s unnie!”

It seemed they had discovered me while I was showering.

On the first day, it had been a bit flustering, but now I didn’t mind.

“Unnie, play with us!”

“She said to call her Teacher!”

“Teacher! Play with us!”

“Soft!”

“Come play with us!”

“Have you seen my glow-in-the-dark stickers?”

“I’ll play with you later. I’m showering right now. You haven’t had breakfast yet, have you? Go to the dining hall.”

“Yes!”

“Yes!”

“Soft…”

“Sigh.”

Surprisingly, the girls listened to me well.

The half-day I spent playing with them on the first day must have left a strong impression on them.

It’s not that I’m particularly skilled at handling kids.

The Immortal Legion girls simply become satisfied and obedient once they’ve released their overflowing energy.

According to Sohi, the girls always had so much energy that they needed to release it through either battles or play.

They were the complete opposite of me, who always dealt with energy shortages, terrible efficiency, and the need for frugality.

【Absorbing the energy of peculiar entities is also efficient.】

“Hey, that’s for enemies, isn’t it?”

No matter how much excess energy the Immortal Legion girls have, my energy drain typically involves transmitting intent to mana through torture or directly plugging in mechanical tendrils or parts of my body to siphon energy.

It’s not something suitable for use on the children.

Even if they are immortal monsters of unknown origin, what makes them who they are now is the tender and delicate minds of young girls.

Even if their essence isn’t human, if they wish to be human themselves, then they are human.

After all, I’m the same.

I shouldn’t treat the children carelessly.

As I touched my freshly scrubbed artificial skin and stepped outside, someone was waiting for me again.

“Teacher…”

It was three girls.

All of them had long black hair that covered their eyes.

I knew who they were.

They were the girls who had been sitting in the corner of the shelter drawing instead of engaging in gunfights with me on the first day.

For reference, the girls each had vastly different personalities.

Most were cheerful extroverts, running around and laughing all day, but there were also introverted ones who couldn’t even meet others’ eyes out of shyness.

The three girls waiting for me were the latter type.

“Uh, um… this is for you…”

With a timid voice, one of the girls held out a sketchbook.

Inside the sketchbook was a crayon drawing of me.

The childlike, clumsy, and crude drawing depicted me climbing a wall like a spider, avoiding gunfire from the other girls yesterday.

“Pfft.”

“Eek!”

“Ah!”

“Waaah…”

The girls visibly shrank their shoulders, thinking I was laughing at their drawing.

“No, no, you did a great job.”

It wasn’t a genuinely well-drawn picture.

While they captured my white-haired face distinctly, my body was drawn as an actual spider.

Still, they had managed to capture the features well.

They had illustrated my awkward figure in a suit dodging gunfire, as well as the chaotic surroundings, in surprising detail.

“Hehe…”

“Really?”

“Teacher, do you like the picture?”

“Yeah, you did great. If you keep practicing, you’ll get even better than this.”

At first, it felt awkward being called “Teacher” by the children, but a week was enough time to get used to this place.

In Sohi’s case, she had been taking care of the children for a long time, but the Immortal Legion girls, due to their memories of being nearly executed in the past, were wary of adults and men.

“Hehe…”

“Teacher praised us…”

In that sense, my appearance must make it easier for the children to lower their guard around me.

I looked like a doll, and I wasn’t old enough to be called an adult.

“It’s almost time for breakfast. I need to get dressed, so head down first.”

“Yes…”

“Okay!”

When I took the suit out of the auto washer, it smelled like sunlight.

【Human, there is no such thing as the smell of sunlight.】

“Just take it as a feeling, alright?”

I also had to put on my coat.

The standard-issue suit from Ark was versatile, breathable, flexible, and durable—essentially a multipurpose outfit—but it clung so tightly to the skin that it made me look a bit too risqué.

Honestly, I didn’t care about how others saw me, but I had to be cautious since the kids might imitate me.

The dining hall was lively.

Cooking robots sent from Saya Guild headquarters were hard at work in the kitchen, while the children eagerly shouted for their food or drooled as they waited for their portions.

Apparently, they didn’t use to listen when told to wait and often stormed the kitchen, causing Sohi a lot of trouble trying to manage them.

“Good morning, Teacher Alice.”

“Yes, you too.”

For reference, I call Sohi casually and informally.

She is my employer, so I considered speaking politely, but she insisted we speak casually, saying it felt like we were peers.

Like Fira Dunhill, older women in Ark seem strangely fixated on these things.

Of course, I have the sense not to say this out loud.

“Food!”

“Food time!”

When the time came, the kitchen robots simultaneously served the children their meals.

“What’s today’s meal?”

“Seafood Bibim Sauce!”

“Wow.”

“Oh, I’m drooling.”

“Soft…”

“Ugh, I hate seafood bibim sauce.”

“Then give it to me.”

Apparently, the children could survive without eating, but Sohi insisted on having meals together with them.

I understand why.

Eating, including the enjoyment of good food, is inherently delightful and interesting.

The excitement the girls felt just before their trays arrived reminded me of the hopeful anticipation we all had as children.

The meal was impressively well-prepared.

The main course included sweet potato fries, soy-braised chicken, and Vienna sausages.

Rice and mushroom soup were served simultaneously, so you could pick whichever you preferred, accompanied by canned seafood bibim sauce and some unidentified vegetable salad as sides.

Aside from the seafood bibim sauce, the food was generally delicious.

“Oh, by the way, the Steelworks of Ark donated additional seafood bibim sauce.”

“They donated that again?”

“Yes, it’s food that you wouldn’t eat unless you were on the brink of starvation. Even disposing of it is a hassle, and Saya Guild’s headquarters is one of the few places willing to accept it as a donation.”

Canned seafood bibim sauce is classified as emergency food distributed to various industrial districts, orphanages, and shelters.

Its flavor is notoriously terrible, so much so that even Ark’s advanced technology and magic couldn’t improve it, making it one of the surplus items left to gather dust in warehouses.

Rumor has it that it’s a collaborative product made by some veterans’ association and 19 companies—a culinary embodiment of corruption.

Regardless, the Immortal Legion girls surprisingly enjoy the seafood bibim sauce.

Of course, many girls don’t like it, but Saya Guild’s satellite city branch is one of the few entities willing to take the surplus seafood bibim sauce from nearby industrial zones.

“But everything else tastes good.”

“Hohoho, naturally edible dishes are rare in Ark.”

The crispy flavor of the sweet potato fries was excellent, and the soy-braised chicken was tender and easy to swallow.

The Vienna sausages, not made from industrial products, were crafted from pigs raised in Zain, slaughtered directly by Saya Guild.

They were large and flavorful.

When I bit into one, its rich juices burst into my mouth.

Eating it with a spoonful of rice was the perfect combination—a true rice thief.

Vegetables?

A real man doesn’t bother with vegetables.

【Human, you are not currently a “real man,” nor have you ever been…】

“Shut up, you beep-boop AI that doesn’t understand the human heart!”

After eating, I’d play with the kids for about 30 minutes, then spend the remaining time watching TV or relaxing until lunch.

The schedule didn’t change much; it was a comfortable and lazy routine.

It might seem like I was freeloading off Saya Guild, but I was still technically fulfilling a request.

Of course, bathing in expensive groundwater that costs a fortune in Ark, eating Saya Guild’s full-course meals for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and secretly charging my tendrils with electricity from outlets in empty rooms were all part of the job.

I’m not indulging in selfish desires—not even a bit.

“By the way, a directive has come from headquarters.”

Sohi casually spoke up while eating.

“A directive? Looks like it’s finally time to do something.”

It seemed my lazy life would soon come to an end.

While eating, Sohi handed me a holographic request form.

【Displaying faction map based on information.】

Thanks to Theresa hacking into the holographic request form, I could see a visual of the satellite city Zain and the various factions within it.

During the week I spent idly at Saya Guild, Theresa had used accessible networks and internal internet to gather information about Zain’s political landscape.

Zain was effectively divided between two major mega-corporations, with Saya Guild controlling only a small district.

“To the north of satellite city Zain, Dawn and Earnest Rail have a battlefront where they’re suppressing external forces.”

“External forces?”

“People either exiled from Ark or those who originally lived outside Ark.”

I’d heard the area outside Ark was uninhabitable, but that didn’t seem entirely true.

“It’s usually one of two cases: either Awakened criminals who committed major crimes in Ark and were exiled, or those who, instead of adapting to the wilderness, lost their sanity and became ape-like creatures that eat humans.”

“So the latter are practically monsters?”

“They were originally human. They have no rights, and the policy is to kill them on sight.”

Sohi poked her Vienna sausage with a fork.

“Headquarters says there’s been a disruption in the suppression front.”

“What kind of disruption? Are the external forces launching a strong counterattack?”

“No, the external forces are almost completely annihilated. It’s just a matter of delivering the final blow, but Earnest Rail betrayed Dawn and ambushed them.”

When Dawn deployed their main forces to the coordinates of the external forces, they were met with a group of Hunters hired by Earnest Rail.

Naturally, Dawn’s main forces were decimated, and their resources were plundered by Earnest Rail.

“Victory makes you the most vulnerable, huh?”

“Exactly. Here, the betrayed side is always seen as the fool.”

That’s how things are here.

You cooperate today, betray tomorrow, and get plundered the next day.

While employees and Hunters spill their blood for corporate dominance in Zain, the mega-corporate executives see lives not as lives but as mere numbers.

“Our job now is to take the kids and cause chaos over there.”