I Can’t Run Away From the Girl Who Saved Me

112 – Secret Talk (4)

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“Did you kill him?”

The sins of Sylvia towards Sister Alice were so great that they were hidden,

I too was a sinner.

The sword of judgment wielded by my conscience was pointed straight at me.

I had absolutely no intention of trying to get out of the situation with a lie, but I was also convinced that no lie would work.

Unlike her trembling voice, Sister Alice’s gaze stretched straight toward me.

Because it was clear that no lie would be of any use in front of him.

But why can’t I open my mouth to say it?

Is it guilt towards the dead?

Or maybe it was because I was afraid that Sister Alice might never forgive me and Sylvia.

Or is it just because I’m a coward?

I didn’t even have the courage to boldly confess my mistakes and ask for forgiveness, so I couldn’t say anything.

I could only nod my head with a miserable heart.

“under,”

Sister Alice’s sigh, or lament, rang out briefly.

My sister’s gaze was fixed firmly on my face, which was bowed down, as she clenched her fists with a miserable smile.

“… Raise your head.”

“…”

“Look at me. Ash. Now.”

Even at Sister Alice’s request, I couldn’t raise my head.

Then she reached out and forcibly lifted my face.

Her sudden touch was as strong and firm as Sylvia’s.

“Ugh,”

“…You killed him? Ash… You?”

“… huh,”

Sister Alice’s two eyes were constantly twitching and twitching.

Was it because I was holding back my rising emotions, or was it because of the pain that came from my divine power blocking this curse transmitted through my gaze?

The tips of her fingers that held my chin trembled slightly.

“… It’s because of the curse.”

“…”

“It wasn’t your will.”

Sister Alice slowly released the hand that was holding my chin and continued to caress my cheek as she spoke.

Well, what she said was true.

This curse, which distorts the human mind with rage and madness, has led to murder.

No, even the expression murder was too polite and refined.

The terrible atrocities I committed that day were closer to the atrocities committed by the devils of hell than the acts of evil human beings.

I remember it clearly.

It’s not that you want to kill the other person because you hate them, but it’s the feeling of wanting to kill them because you have to.

Rather than a clean attack targeting a vital point, the thrill of tearing apart an opponent and destroying their body, and an endless hatred for living, breathing human bodies.

That overwhelming murderous intent, which no normal person, no normal person, would be able to sympathize with, was clearly caused by a curse.

But I didn’t bother to make excuses.

Because I knew all too well how it felt to lose someone precious and have no one to blame.

But even without making any excuses, Sister Alice was the first to extend a hand of understanding and tolerance to me.

“You, who did all the stupid things Eric told you to do just because you didn’t want to fight, there’s no way you would want to kill someone.”

“…Sister,”

“My men died… because I sent them into this forest without any care… It’s my fault, it’s all my fault.”

My sister slowly removed her hand from my cheek and lowered her head.

Her hands, tightly clenched in her fists the sleeves of the cloth I had made for her, were trembling.

“I… killed them, and I… made Ash trap himself in this forest…”

“No. Ever since I heard Sylvia’s explanation about the curse, I had no intention of leaving the forest.”

“You didn’t want to go out?”

“…that,”

“There’s a difference between being told you can’t go out and not even wanting to go out.”

“…”

“You completely gave up on leaving the forest after you killed my men… didn’t you?”

Her words shocked me as if I had been hit hard in the back of the head.

A small difference that I didn’t even realize because it had become so natural to me that I shouldn’t go out in the forest.

‘You must not go out.’ and ‘You cannot go out.’

Since when did I start thinking that I could never leave this forest?

Of course, I never thought that I would meet someone who could help me, but when I actually met someone who could help me, why did I just avoid their gaze without a single second of hesitation?

“No, no.”

“Ash.”

“I… hurt those priests… Of course, it was truly horrible, and it was such a shock to me… But it’s not because of that guilt that I can’t leave the forest.”

“…”

“It’s my fault that they died. It’s not your fault that you have to bear the guilt. It’s not your fault.”

“…Ugh,”

Sister Alice bowed her head even further.

The sight of my sister shaking her whole body slightly while exposing her face to me was somehow very unfamiliar.

Her shoulders somehow looked very small.

I silently wrapped my arm around her shoulder.

My older sister also came out and put her arm around my shoulder without saying a word.

Both she and I felt guilt and self-loathing that were difficult to bear alone.

As if trying to forget the pain a little with each other’s warmth, we put our arms around each other and leaned our heads on each other’s shoulders.

It was only when her face got closer to my ear that I could hear her sobbing, however faintly.

After a few seconds of silence, she slowly opened her mouth, her voice slightly hushed.

“Ash.”

“…huh,”

“It’s not your fault. You know that, right?”

“What? They’re dead? Or have I decided to live in this forest?”

“…both.”

I said, shaking my head.

“It’s not your fault, sister.”

“… That’s not it.”

But Sister Alice shook her head firmly.

Surely my words were nothing more than irresponsible consolation intended to comfort her.

It may not have been her fault for trapping me in this forest, but she and I were certainly responsible for their deaths.

However, when I compared her who sent them to this place with me who killed them, I was the one who committed the greater sin.

I said, patting my sister’s back as she swayed.

“Then it’s my fault.”

“…what the heck is that,”

“Thank you though… for saying that, Sister.”

I interrupted Sister Alice and hugged her tightly, but she released my embrace, grabbed my face, and looked straight into my eyes.

She said, glaring at me with watery eyes.

“Listen carefully, Ash. They came to this damn forest on my orders, and you harmed them against your will by the curse.”

“… that,”

“So, you don’t have to feel guilty.”

“…”

“I don’t have to confine you to this forest because of guilt.”

My sister said that and hugged my head tightly.

“…Sister?”

“therefore…”

My sister whispered in my ear in a very small voice, as if she was worried that Sylvia, who was far away, might hear her.

“Come out into the forest with me.”

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“What are you talking about, sis…”

“I mean, literally. Come out of this fucking forest with me.”

“But, this curse…”

“I can solve it.”

Sister Alice looked straight at me and declared.

“I couldn’t lift that curse, but that doesn’t mean it’s completely impossible. I’m not a professional healer.”

I swallowed heavily in surprise.

“…Then you too, Sylvia.”

“no,”

My sister shook her head.

“Your curse is different from Sylvia’s, who was cursed directly by the Demon King. I can tell the difference by the pain my eyes feel.”

“…”

“It is impossible to lift Sylvia’s curse, but your curse, which is nothing more than a deteriorated copy, can be lifted.”

“… Then, Sylvia,”

“Ash.”

Sister Alice cut me off by calling my name in a heavy, hushed voice.

“I just asked you two questions.”

“…uh?”

“And I knew that you really loved Sylvia and that you killed my men.”

“…”

“And I also revealed to you that your curse can be lifted.”

Affected by her momentum, I nodded silently.

“Now this is my last question.”

“…”

“Is it your own conclusion that you can’t leave the forest?”

It took me a while to figure out what her question meant.

But slowly. Very slowly.

Little by little, I was able to figure out what Sister Alice was trying to say.

The moment when I finally realized the full meaning of her last question.

Suddenly a familiar voice passed through my head.

‘I told you, Ash.’

‘You can’t go out now.’

‘You can’t leave me.’

That was when.

We heard the cabin door open, and Alice and I both turned our heads in that direction at the same time.

“Are you hungry? I caught plenty.”

Ms. Sylvia came into the cabin smiling.

In his hand he held the lump of iron that had imprisoned Sister Alice, and inside it were flapping fish, slowly dying.

In a world filled with darkness, a red glowing bonfire stood out clearly.

The faint smile on Sylvia’s lips and the red eyes that looked down at us with a sharp gaze that made that smile pale.

.