I Tried To Be Her Loyal Sword

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The air in the alley grew heavy in an instant. Zigmund’s and my energy swelled and pressed against each other like the territory of wild beasts.

I narrowed my eyes and met his glimmering violet gaze.

“It seems you want something, right?”

“Well, who knows?”

A vague answer returned to my probing question. I tried to read his completely white face, which was so unblemished that the ground could not be seen, but all I could discern was the simple fact that he was enjoying himself.

“You’re the one requesting a deal, so you should make an offer that satisfies me. Think it over.”

Zigmund, with his arms crossed, tilted his head back. His eyes, lit by the sunlight, sparkled like amethyst.

‘He’s really relishing this…

I ground my teeth. It was clear Zigmund was savoring this situation where I had to yield.

Unfortunate but understandable. If I were in Zigmund’s position, I would have ordered him to kneel with a smirk.

“Pass your subordinates first. Send Märhen Deckardo as well. We’ll negotiate afterward.”

I waved my hand, making a sulky face. Zigmund let out a mocking chuckle.

“Deals are usually prepaid. What if you run away after sending Märhen Deckardo?”

“Ha. Do I look like someone who would do that?”

I raised my eyebrows sharply and matched his unwavering gaze. He blinked slowly.

Trust is like a tightrope walk across a cliff—a connection that can only be sustained when you’re sure the rope beneath you isn’t a rotten one.

Zigmund and I had long since stepped off that rope, and a deep chasm had formed between us. Carelessly stepping on that rope again could lead to a fall that wouldn’t end with just a few scrapes.

We were in no position to demand trust from each other.

“You know I wouldn’t cowardly run away from you.”

All I was pointing out was the information he had accumulated about me during our time together.

I knew Zigmund, and he knew me. I didn’t trust him, but there were certain certainties I had about him from experiences.

In short, if chocolate and candied violets were presented to Zigmund, he would choose the candies, and if someone asked him to choose between desire and duty, he would choose the latter.

Zigmund must have had certainties about me too. Moreover, knowing his personality, he was probably calculating my actions thoroughly.

“I’d rather commit seppuku than owe you anything.”

I said firmly, glaring.

I hated being in debt. Especially to someone like Zigmund.

“Haha!”

Zigmund burst into laughter. It was a rare sight to see him laugh so heartily, and I blinked, somewhat surprised. Though his face was hidden as he laughed with his head lowered, I fleetingly saw a crooked smile forming in the shadow beneath his jaw.

“Yeah. That sounds like you.”

After a moment, Zigmund stopped laughing and lifted his head. He wore a smile that was oddly both cheerful and bitter.

“Denvers. Take the young master Deckardo with you. You lot head back to the guild, and the young master can stay behind.”

A chilling energy spread with his low voice. I even held my breath for a moment. It felt like a cold wind buried in a heap of winter snow was emanating from Zigmund.

“…Understood.”

The man called Denvers flinched but nodded without a word. His eyes brimmed with loyalty, a complete subservience that made me ponder how he had been trained to such an extent.

“Hey, over there!”

Märhen, who was strewn on the floor like trash, called out to Denvers as he appeared to lift him like a piece of luggage. I turned to him with a bitter feeling, dissatisfied with the situation of having saved Märhen.

“Thank you for saving me…”

“Hey.”

“Y-yes?”

I glared coldly at Märhen, who seemed to accept his rescue as if it were without reason, intending only to send him off to die at Lewelin’s hands. My mercenary days, when I lived as a noble and restrained my temper, unwittingly bubbled to the surface.

“Get lost.”

I was not a philanthropist who could embrace all of humanity. I loathed Märhen, who dared to limit my friend’s potential and insult me.

Whether it was the intensity in my gaze that he read or not, Märhen trembled and hurriedly averted his eyes. I restrained the impulse to punch him and turned my head sharply. Denvers took Märhen with him like a sack and disappeared with the others.

“I didn’t know you had a bad relationship with Märhen Deckardo.”

Zigmund, who had been watching with his arms crossed, finally spoke after their presence had completely vanished. I frowned.

“Not merely bad—it’s contemptible. I truly dislike that guy.”

“You’re quite harsh. But then again… he never was a decent human being.”

Zigmund removed his mask. The sight of him uncovering the face that had been thoroughly concealed was strangely poignant. I hesitated for a moment before doing the same and taking off my mask. After all, there was no need to hide since we had already seen each other’s true faces.

Zigmund effortlessly drew out vivid and intense emotions from me, which for the most part were negative. But I found I could be most honest in front of him.

‘I thought I was quite comfortable.’

As this realization struck me, I slowly blinked.

Indeed, if I had to name the most comfortable people in this world, I might have to include Zigmund alongside Aria and Leo.

Realizing that this awareness was anything but pleasant, I tousled my hair in frustration when Zigmund spoke again.

“I was planning to catch Märhen Deckardo and meddle with the Deckardo family, but it’s fallen through because of you. I’ve incurred quite a loss.”

Zigmund rolled his mask in his hands and looked at me with a relaxed gaze.

“I’ll look forward to seeing how you’ll compensate for my loss.”

‘What an annoying little brat…

I bit my lip. My fists naturally clenched, but I wasn’t foolish enough to swing wildly, so I just kept them balled.

I boldly declared that I would pay the price and sent Märhen away, yet I had yet to come up with what exactly I could offer in return.

If it were about money, I could provide as much as needed, but that guy, being the leader of a massive guild, surely wasn’t in need of cash. Besides, he had stated himself that he had his eyes set on the family in the first place.

‘What else could I give besides money?’

He was so devious that it was hard to read what he wanted. Glancing discreetly, I timidly presented my mask to Zigmund.

“…Would you like the Black Mask now?”

Zigmund burst into laughter. His face, warmed with mirth, met mine.

“That mask I earned by stabbing my own eyes, huh?”

“You said you’d let me have it back then.”

I turned my gaze away, feeling a twinge of guilt from my words. He glanced at me while chuckling softly.

“I’ve grown accustomed to the White Mask, so that’s fine. It seems you really have nothing to trade after all?”

“I just want to hit the road now, so quit nagging me.”

I seriously pondered. Honestly, I was full of the desire to slink away, but my pride wouldn’t allow it.

I assessed what I had in my pockets, weighing whether I had anything particularly precious to offer, but alas, there wasn’t anything that would suffice for Zigmund.

‘What on earth am I doing?’

While I was lost in serious contemplation, a strong sense of doubt washed over me.

“Speak what you desire while I’m still being nice.”

I unsheathed my sword irritably.

When Zigmund saw me struggling with indecision, he let out a small chuckle. It had been quite a while since he laughed this much.

“You still haven’t shaken off that habit of drawing your sword as soon as things go south.”

Zigmund pressed down on the blade of my sword. His gloved hand wouldn’t get cut, yet it reminded me of the day we first met, when he tightly gripped my sword and bled onto it, making me flinch and lower the blade.

“Does that mean if you want something, I must grant it?”

As I hesitated to lower my sword, Zigmund’s gaze left the blade and returned to me. His strangely subdued violet eyes deepened the atmosphere. I firmly steeled myself and opened my mouth.

“I’ll consider granting reasonable requests. But if you ask for something unreasonable like conquering the Empire… I’ll accept it as a duel request.”

“Hah. I’m not that unreasonable of a person.”

“No, you’re unbelievable and devoid of character and conscience, a brute.”

Zigmund and I exchanged light banter. He looked exasperated at my ridiculousness and sighed.

“That’s not what I’m asking for. However… let’s postpone the price for later.”

‘What are you scheming?’

I narrowed my eyes at Zigmund. I expected him to hurl some troublesome demands my way for his amusement, but instead, he was postponing them. I still couldn’t decipher his intentions.

“I have something to ask of you soon. It’s not grand, but it might be presumptuous.”

Zigmund spoke in a tone that seemed resigned as he stared at me. His eyes were tinted with the feelings of autumn—doubt and bitterness. His hand that had been resting on the sword began to slowly pull back as if calling for something it shouldn’t have desired.

“When the time comes, you’re free to refuse if it’s troublesome.”

“……Is it really okay for you to have such lenient terms?”

I frowned. Granting me the right to refuse meant that I would practically get away with paying no price at all.

As I pondered what he might be asking, Zigmund slowly began to speak.

“You won’t refuse unless it’s truly troublesome. You’ll follow your conscience.”

As expected, Zigmund knew me too well.

In reality, I would likely strive to fulfill Zigmund’s request simply because of my pride. Feeling the impulse to thrust my sword against his throat while telling him he knew too much, I shoved it away with unusual roughness.

“I’m not doing this because I like you, but rather because of my principles.”

“Indeed. Following your conscience is what my mentor taught me.”

The weight of those words was immensity itself. I irritably ruffled my hair, recalling my younger days.

“……Don’t make requests that I’ll have to refuse. It’ll hurt my pride.”

“Well, try.”

Zigmund left me with a cryptic response as he donned his mask. It felt as though he was trying to wrap up this encounter.

Rather than leaping over a wall and disappearing right away, Zigmund paused for a moment. It seemed he was deep in thought. In what seemed out of character for him, he moved his hands hesitantly, conflicted, before finally reaching into his pocket to pull out something and threw it to me.

Thud.

‘What… is this for?’

I lightly caught the object that flew through the air and squinted at its identity.

The long tassels in deep violet appeared somewhat shabby. It looked like something made by someone lacking in craft skills. It was a bit dingy and seemed worn as if it had been made a long time ago.

‘Is he telling me to eat this and get lost?’

Without explanation, he threw me this secondhand item, and that was my first thought. Puzzled, I stared at Zigmund, who avoided my gaze.

“……It was your birthday gift that I couldn’t deliver that year.”

The mention of ‘that year’ made my smile stiffen. I didn’t need additional explanation to know what time he referred to.

‘The year Karasho died.’

Karasho passed away in winter. The good man, who valued the natural order, departed peacefully in the season when all life rests. I felt my breath freeze as if facing the north wind, gripping the ornament tightly in my hand.

My birthday was also in winter—a pale and cold winter. Moreover, it was on the last day of the year, the most incomplete and precarious day.

My birthday followed Karasho’s death by less than ten days.

“Why do you still have this?”

I asked, unable to conceal the agitation in my voice while looking down at the ground. Zigmund pressed his hood down firmly.

“I was going to throw it away. But… I just couldn’t.”

His face was obscured by the deep hood, hiding his expression. All I could tell was that his voice had taken on a heavy tone.

“I thought the owner, you, should decide what to do with it.”

I clutched the ornament tightly. The piece that had arrived so late to find its owner was tarnished and had lost its beauty to the ravages of time.

That made me even more sorrowful.

“Do as you wish; you can throw it away or burn it.”

With those words, Zigmund abruptly rose and lightly leaped over the wall, vanishing in an instant. I glared at his back until it disappeared.

Not a single beautiful word was exchanged, just a thoroughly detestable fool. It was hard to find anything we had in common, and he was the remnants of a resentful past.

I roughly stuffed the ornament into my pocket. My bitten lip trembled slightly.

‘Is that how you turned this into a doll now? Is it a cursed doll?’

‘……Shut up.’

‘How about trying to get a job in that field? A dastardly cursed doll like that would sell like hotcakes.’

‘……Damn it.’

Zigmund lacked any talent for craftsmanship. There was a time he took a part-time job making dolls, and his hideous creations had left me in shock. Knowing he had such horrible skills, it was no wonder he never bothered with crafts.

‘For that guy to have made this. As a birthday gift for me.’

The clumsy craftsmanship with a slightly unusual knot shape clearly bore Zigmund’s handiwork.

I took a deep breath, then covered my face with one hand.

An ornament that had wandered far too long without its owner was coated in grime. It indicated that Zigmund hadn’t merely stuffed it away in some box.

“Son of a bitch…”

I muttered quietly in the lonely alley.

It was clear that I would neither use nor discard this ornament.