Infinite Farmer: A Plants vs Dungeon

Triumph! You have destroyed a superior enemy in combat after a long journey meant to drain your strength. From here on, you will forever be more prepared for that kind of pre-emptive attempt to reduce your strength. Rewards: Level cap on plants raised by one

“Oh, hell yes.” Brist held up his own fist and stared at it in awe, like he was looking at his own hand for the first time. “You know what I got from that, kid?”

“What?”

“Another stock of that triple punch. It recharges a hell of a lot more slowly, but… yeah. Good day. Good job with those flowers too. I wouldn’t have thought of that. Lucky you did, cause…” Brist fell over onto his back, groaning. “That thing was hitting me a lot at the end there. Pretty good timing.”

As the arch formed at one of the ends of the room, Tulland looped his shoulder under Brist’s arm and dragged him to the arch, tossing the fighter through ahead of himself. He hadn’t asked about Tulland’s reward, and Tulland hadn’t offered the information. That didn’t mean it wasn’t good. Tulland took a breath, wondering what a full tenth increase to the power of his plants would even look like in his farm value score. Hopefully, he’d have time to see it before the next challenge.

Stepping through, he found himself face to face with a very surprised Necia. She punched him.

“How do you think it feels, Tulland,” Necia brandished her fist at her downed boyfriend, who had just learned it took a split second to gain back all his power from his farm once he was back in range of it. His regeneration kicked in fast, but not before he felt ever bit of that punch. “How do you think it feels when your boyfriend just disappears for days and days with no warning?”

“No time desync this time?” Tulland rubbed his nose as the regeneration slowly soothed the burn. “I thought maybe it wouldn’t.”

“No time desync. Just me being very worried.”

“Sorry.” Tulland smiled as apologetically as he could. “Brist found an arch and designated me as his dungeon-buddy. It didn’t occur to him to ask first. I just got pulled in right away.”

The idea that someone else was more at fault than Tulland seemed new to Necia. She looked at the door thoughtfully, then bent down and gave Tulland a quick kiss.

“I’m going to hit Brist a few times real quick.” She seemed certain she could, and Tulland didn’t doubt now was the best time to make it happen. She might not be able to once Brist fully healed from his fight. “I’ll be back. Play with your farm or something in the meantime.”

An odd girl. I do like her, but… odd. You’d never know she was a princess.

I don’t think she is, here. If I’m right, that’s the real reason she came here in the first place.

It sounds accurate enough. Now, use your special dirt on your farm. Enhance it. Quickly, before you get pulled into the next trouble. Those extra levels might be a larger thing than you think.

Tulland did as he was told. Not every plant leveled right away, but those that didn’t were vastly outnumbered by those that did. The effect was not small.

Farm Status: Total Points: 12332

That’s very good. Your larger more advanced plants haven’t even leveled yet. That should be the biggest change.

Maybe. Do you know why I’m not gaining any levels, lately? I feel as if I’m stuck in place in that respect, even though I’m killing bigger weirder things than ever before.

Your level took a huge leap forward when you came here, Tulland. Seventy is… I don’t believe there are more than a few people on any given world that even approach this. I would be surprised to find the system gives you much in the way of experience after this.

To keep me from leveling?

To give you a chance to keep living. Each incremental level from here won’t make much difference. Skill levels still might, but this increase to your level is worth many of those by itself. Broadening what you can do gives you the chance to live longer, so long as you make the most of the new capabilities.

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Even so, I think you’ve missed the biggest point of all this. The Infinite might have too.

Oh?

The Chimera Sleeves. Tulland poured a bucket-full of enhanced dirt on the part of his farms the sleeves lived in, then commanded the few on his person to replant themselves. Juicing them with Primal Growth, he turned to watering the entire farm, gratified to see Necia had kept it from ever getting bone-dry while he was gone. Remember how they explain themselves better and better with every level?

I do.

Well, I doubt The Infinite ever thought I’d get them to level eleven. Ten was likely all the explanation it ever wanted me to have.

Oh. Yes, I see. That might be useful.

It just might.

It was a bit of a problem actually getting the Chimera Sleeves to level 11. They had steadily leveled in the dirt Tulland had brought them both from the warfare floors and his bucket without too much trouble. Probably due to his enhanced skill levels, most of his plants had grown better and healthier beyond even what he’d expect from that. But level 11 turned out to be a different kind of thing, something more elusive and difficult to attain.

“Still trying.” Tulland looked up as Necia entered. “Not yet.”

“I could tell. You look incredibly unhappy about it.”

“I am. There’s not much left for me to do this round besides this. If I can get it in time, I’ll be stronger.”

“What about that new tree that came out of the splicer? I thought that was the next big thing for you.”

“It was. But it’s not going to be fast.”

Tulland looked over at the tiny sprout beginnings of his new sapling, a feeling of unfair hatred washing over him as he did. It was such a potentially cool thing to be disappointed about that he almost couldn’t stand the conflict of it all.

Dark Steel Cedar Named after a mythical tree famed for its appealing scent, the Dark Steel Cedar is a powerful evolution of the Ironbranch tree. Having returned to that ancestor of the Giant’s Toe and combining it with a long-forgotten fragment of metallic beast carried through the floors by a fellow adventurer, you have created a truly durable plant entirely of the System and bent entirely to the task of stopping attacks. Stubborn and supernaturally tough, the Dark Steel Cedar resists all attempts to cut it, smash it, or otherwise change its shape. The only exception to this rule is granted to the master of the tree, who can carve it as easily with a conventional knife as he might whittle a plain stick. Armor made from the Dark Steel Cedar will almost certainly be of above-average quality compared to what you have worn in the past.

For something so promising to grow so very, very slowly was a blow to the heart that Tulland had not been expecting to hurt him so deeply. It didn’t help that stresses of all kinds were abounding just then.

“So they never came back?” Tulland asked.

“No. You were gone days ago, which should have been enough. I think at this point we have to assume all of them died.” Necia sighed. “Shame. Allysi seemed like a decent enough man.”

“He did. And from what he told us. Rossi might not have been that bad, either. Dumb, maybe, but he came in here to rescue someone. That’s not the worst.”

“It is when you are put in charge of troops and don’t ask enough questions. Those men were his responsibility as soon as he took command of them, and it doesn’t seem he ever questioned why they were walking into a death trap.”

“Maybe. Either way, I don’t think I would have wished death on any of them. I’m more angry at the people who sent them.”

“We are agreed on that, at least.”

Tulland decided to spend another full night feeding his plants. It wouldn’t get the tree anywhere big enough, but it just might have been enough for the Chimera Vines. With no other quick way to grow, it seemed like his best option. Given that Brist either wasn’t home or wasn’t coming out that night, that left Tulland exactly one person to talk to as Necia snored away the night in her nice, comfortable bedroll.

So, System.

Yes?

What was your plan?

I don’t think I understand you. My plan for what?

You know. For after I die, and you get all my energy. You must have had one. You must still have one, actually. It’s not as if I’ll survive forever.

Ah. That. To simply take the energy and spend it.

On what?

High-yield, low-risk investments. Anything that seemed like it would make a significant impact without wasting the resources.

System?

Yes?

I think you know that’s not really an answer. Come on. What am I even going to do about it, from here? It’s not like I can stop you.

I know that, Tulland. It’s simply that the exact plan is not something I would want to do now. I’ve had more time to consider than I expected, and realized it was not the correct path.

Fine, then. What was your plan? Before you abandoned it?

The System thought about it for a moment, then sighed. Tulland thought it might be the first time he had heard it do that.

I was going to destroy the Church.

The Church had been so omnipresent in Tulland’s life and the life of everyone else in his world that he found he literally couldn’t imagine this happening. Trying to think about what life would be like without the dominant force in charge of his world actually hurt his head a little.

How? Could you just… rain fire down on them?

Certainly not. Interacting with the world is one of the more expensive things a system can do. It would have hardly been worth the investment of points. Much less the inelegance of simply destroying things by brute force when more subtle means would suffice.

I swear, system, you need to get talking before I just send you away.

Fine. The idea was that I would simply invalidate classes having to do with System interaction.

Tulland sat up straighter. That did make sense, actually, in a horrible way. The Church comprised about a twentieth of the total population of his world, he had heard. They were the vast majority of class holders, as well, and almost all of them had classes that in some way stemmed from their founder’s. They never actually said those classes were built around using control of the world that once belonged to the System, but it was at least a dimly understood thing that they did.

The immediate aftermath of all those classes burning to ash in the souls of their holders was hard to imagine, but Tulland knew it wouldn’t be good. More likely, it would be the greatest disaster to ever befall their world.