King of All I Survey

I didn't spend all this time locked in study. There was only so much information that could be forcibly downloaded into a human brain at one time, especially an eight-year-old's brain. I'm told some of the limiting factors were the danger of overwriting information that was already there, and more importantly, artificially overworking brain cells beyond their ability replenish ATP stores, which could cause cell damage or even kill brain cells. I didn't study this area particularly, so I didn't know all the details, but Joe said in humans it had something to do with neurotransmitter dysfunction and too many calcium ions entering the cells and causing permanent damage. In other words, the amount of time in which information could be poured full throttle into my brain was limited to less than an hour a day, and every three days, I'd need to skip a day. Joe carefully monitored by brain's responses to adjust the schedule accordingly. In children, there was also the issue of leaving capacity for the usual learning and maturation. So we had to allow a large buffer of unused potential or risk interfering with my normal childhood development. We focused on Math/Physics and Economics. I needed to be able to understand something about alien technologies and how to manage a planetary treasury.

"So," I asked, "What happens if I die, or my brain gets fried, and I can't rule Earth?" Up until now, I hadn't even considered this as a possibility, but I could get hit by a bus tomorrow… well, my shield ring would probably keep me alive, but things could happen. Who would the aliens deal with then? What would happen to my contracts, treaties and business interests?

"All such obligations would remain in force. Since you entered into them in your official capacity, they belong to the office of Supreme Ruler of the Entire Earth Solar System and Nearby Space, rather than to you as an individual. In the event of your incapacity or death, they would fall to the new Supreme Ruler." Joe told me, audibly so as to reserve direct brain interfacing for our regular lesson transfers.

"The next Supreme Ruler? Who would that be? How does the next Ruler get selected?" Yikes, that could ruin everything. Imagine if it went to my closest relative and Mom became King of Earth. I laughed as I imagined her first royal decree: "Everyone eat your vegetables and get to bed by 9:30, by order of the King." Jo laughed when I explained what I was laughing at.

"I think she might make a more capable ruler than you think," he said after we finished laughing.

"Maybe," I conceded, "But how does choosing a new King work?"

"First, each planetary system sets up its own rules for succession. Some hold elections, some use hereditary titles, others have official designees selected by the current leadership. Not all of them have Kings, per se. Some use councils or assemblies of elected representatives. In Earth's case, there is no official succession policy, and you have not designated a replacement. Leadership would fall to whomever claimed it and first registered the claim. One might imagine a GUTA trader finding someone as gullible as… Someone they want to work with and profit from and getting them to sign the necessary forms."

"Wait a minute. You mean if someone on Earth found out I was the King, they could kill me and claim Earth for themselves?! Or another trader Like Earth Friend could kill me and pick some schmuck who'd sell off all Earth's rights for a billion dollars and an ocean-front castle?"

"Yes, as it stands right now. Of course, if it were a GU citizen, there would be GU law to deal with. Murder, especially of Kings is highly frowned upon."

"We've got to do something about this. I can't be walking around with a price tag on my head. Especially when the price tag is the whole solar system and everything in it. I'd have to lock myself away in my treehouse for the rest of my life!"

"You just need to set up a system for the selection of the next King. Preferably a general system that can be followed as a policy into the future, then record that policy in the Galactic Union Archives," Joe informed me.

"OK, can I change it later if I choose someone now?" I asked.

"Yes, such policies are made or changed at the discretion of the local authority, you, in this case."

"OK. Let's make Mom next in line, then Dad. Then closest living relative." As I thought more about it, I added "except my cousin Billy, he's out."

"I will prepare the document for your approval," Joe replied. An instant later a carrier flew out of the operations room with the document and a pen.

I read it, and found my parents listed by their full names with honorific titles "Mom" and "Dad." I signed it.

"I have witnessed and recorded it in the archives. It is now the official succession policy of Earth." Joe said as the paper was carried away.

"What happens to that? Do you have paper files back there somewhere?"

Joe laughed, "No, King Tim. It will be returned to the synthesizer and broken down to it's constituent atoms. It is the recorded electronic form and video of you signing in the presence of an approved AI that matters."

"Good. If anything should happen, I trust you to tell Mom and help her rule the world the same way you're helping me. Your position as Royal Advisor will continue in the event of my… If I'm not around."

"Yes, King Tim. Long may you live."

I thought he was being a little snarky with that last part, but I couldn't be sure. It was the kind of thing people said around kings, after all.

During this same period, I also had other basic business to get out of the way. I told my parents I was joining a marketing focus group that wanted to find out how kids reacted to new toys and advertisements, and I needed a bank account so they could pay me. Joe fabricated a web site and the emails to make it look like a legit offer. The "pay" was just a few dollars for each evaluation, but Dad thought it was good for me to have a job and learn about having a bank account, as long as I didn't "spend it all in one place." As he said, chuckling to himself with a nod to the bank teller, as we set up the account. Because of my age, it had to be a custodial account. I had other accounts that Joe had set up as business entities, but I needed a way to justify personal spending without my parents getting too suspicious.

Amazingly, my first week of answering toy surveys on the website, I won their random drawing for $5000. Of course, the entire thing was a complete fabrication by Joe and I, and it was just a transfer from one of my shell accounts.

I told my parents, I'd like to take them to Disney, before school starts, with my winnings. I mean, I've always wanted to go to Disney World, and I was the king of the Earth. I should be able to swing it. They insisted that I put the money into a savings account for college, a nice safe Certificate of Deposit with an automatic roll-over.  Fabulous, I thought, 3.8% interest for the foreseeable future. There's some dead money. Of course, I had as much Earth money as I could ever need with Joe Torres handling everything and able to create cryptocurrency at will with his vast computational power. I also had him set up personal accounts in his name both on Earth and in the Galactic Union. I insisted that he pay himself a generous salary in dollars, or Euros or whatever he wanted, as well as Galactic Credits from my royal accounts. Being a recognized person meant he was entitled to fair compensation for his work, after all. I cautioned him against crypto-mining or using his unfair advantages to grow that money for personal gain. It was ok, within limits, to do so for the benefit of the King since all that really belonged to the people and would mostly be used for their benefit, but cheating for personal gain, seemed… like cheating. Not allowed. He said he would make a note of it as he continued to draw up the full Book of Earth Laws.

In order to get use of my custodial bank account funds, Joe and I concocted another fictitious company. This time, it was a game developer. I say fictitious company, but it was real, with a real game. The programming was trivial for Joe, and I just described a game that I would like to play. He did all the work, and it sold pretty well. The plan was to get Dad to allow me to invest my $5000 in that company. Then, almost unbelievably large dividends could be shunted into my bank account. I'd pay off the mortgage on our house, get us to Disney World, and generally, make things easier for my family. It would take some time for all of this to come together, but it was a workable plan.

During this same time, the few weeks before I started the fourth grade, I resolved to begin my efforts to be recognized by the people of Earth as the rightful King of the World. That was a more difficult problem. I figured that I'd need to get a feel for politics and start getting my name recognized. I resolved to run for mayor of my town. The first thing I learned was that Cheshire did not have a mayor. It had a Board of Selectmen, with three elected members. Somehow that didn't seem as glamorous as being the only mayor in charge of a town's government, but it would have to do. Joe and I set to work figuring out how to file for the upcoming election and hashing out my campaign strategy. We were about to set local politics on its ear.