Miracle Illusion

Memories of their first day at the new school overlapped.‘Crawl on all fours. Like a dog.’‘No, like a cockroach from your house.’The voices of Jaeyul’s gang were vividly clear, even from outside the classroom door. Having pieced everything together, Sungwoon shrugged and let out a bitter laugh. It was so childish.“Hey, do you know what my favorite book is?”Standing in front of the bathroom door, Sungwoon asked an unexpected question. Through the front door, Grandma could be seen finishing the laundry in the yard. Her back was hunched forward, making her look uncomfortable.“It’s Fabre’s Book of Insects.”“Fabre’s Book of Insects?”“Don’t you know Fabre’s Book of Insects?”“…….”“Anyway, I like insects.”“What about cockroaches….”“Don’t discriminate. Cockroaches are valuable insects too.”Spouting nonsense to prevent any objections, Sungwoon opened the bathroom door without hesitation. The distinct musty smell mixed with strong bleach, but it didn’t matter. Just as Yeonwoo had said, several cockroaches scurried under the washing machine as soon as the light was turned on. Still, Sungwoon wasn’t particularly bothered. He just thought he’d secretly catch and throw them out if they reappeared.“When will you know the results of the university exam?”“A little while after the college entrance exam results come out.”Grandma peeled the pears that Sungwoon had brought. The two of them sat on a mat in the yard, chatting while looking at the stars in the sky. The autumn wind, just before winter, was cold, but bringing out a blanket made it bearable.“I hope you pass.”“It’s okay if I don’t.”“How can you say that?”“I can try again.”Yeonwoo seemed to care, but Sungwoon appeared indifferent about college. Yeonwoo, watching Sungwoon as he ate a neatly sliced pear in one bite, suddenly ran off and quickly returned with a leaf in his hand.“What’s that?”“I’m going to teach you something Grandma showed me.”Perhaps because winter was approaching, the leaf was more brown than green. A round leaf hung on either side of the long stem. Crawling back under the blanket, Yeonwoo plucked the top leaf.“You’ll pass.”“…….”The second leaf fell.“You’ll fail.”“What is this? Can’t you just count the leaves?”“No, you have to count them one by one. Grandma taught me.”Since it was something Grandma had taught him, there was no room for argument. Sungwoon, buried under the thick blanket with Yeonwoo, quietly watched his actions.“You’ll pass, fail, pass, fail….”There were quite a few leaves, so his chant-like murmuring continued for a while. Sungwoon turned his head and smiled. In the dark, Yeonwoo’s eyes sparkled as he plucked each leaf, grinning widely.“You’ll pass!”The last leaf fell. Yeonwoo shook the remaining stem in his hand. Sungwoon couldn’t say anything and remained frozen. His heart was beating so fast he wondered if something was wrong.“I’ll pray for you.”“Do you have a religion?”“No. Grandma says praying to the stars makes it come true.”“…That’s nice.”The two of them, sitting on the mat, smiled beautifully at each other. Just then, Grandma came into the yard.“You’ll catch a cold. Come inside now.”Nine o’clock in the evening. It was time to go home. The night felt frustratingly dark as time seemed to fly by.“Grandma, please sit here.”“Huh?”“Here. Sit next to Yeonwoo.”Sungwoon got up, causing the blanket covering him to slide off. Grandma, caught off guard, sat where Sungwoon had just been. Yeonwoo and Grandma, wrapped in a thick blanket on the rectangular mat, came into view. Sungwoon’s cheeks rounded with a smile.“Stay still. I’ll draw a picture of you.”Sungwoon quickly ran into the house to fetch his sketchbook and pencil from his bag. Stars sparkled beautifully above the two, who sat on the mat, clueless. Using an empty, dusty jar as a seat, Sungwoon crossed his legs and started drawing.“Hong Yeonwoo, don’t move.”“Huh? Oh… okay.”The sound of the pencil gliding across the paper echoed through the neighborhood, close to the stars. The wind was cold, but no one complained. Sungwoon, with a serious expression devoid of playfulness, moved his pencil.“The stars are really visible here.”“Yeah. It’s a perk of living here.”“You don’t even need to go somewhere to see the stars.”Drawing two stars in the corner of the paper, Sungwoon finally completed the picture. He rubbed the pencil marks off his hand with his palm, then smiled contentedly.“Can I see it?”“Yeah. It’s a gift.”Remembering how Sungwoon had hidden his sketchbook before, Yeonwoo cautiously sought permission. Sungwoon nodded readily and tore the page out to give it to Yeonwoo.“Wow….”“How is it?”“You’re really good at drawing….”There was no need to draw stars. Yeonwoo’s eyes already contained stars. Sungwoon’s gaze was deep as he watched the admiring Yeonwoo.“Grandma, look at this. It’s us.”Excited, Yeonwoo flitted around like a butterfly, showing the drawing to Grandma. The two chatted happily. Sitting on the jar, Sungwoon folded his arms and lowered his head, laughter escaping him.The drawing that Sungwoon made in ten minutes was hung on the wall of Yeonwoo’s house, replacing the photographs that had stopped being taken after he was five.⟡˖ ࣪“How did it go?”“I just need to meet the minimum. How about you?”“Well….”Having mostly guessed and dozed off, Yeonwoo could only remember the lunch he had during the test. He laughed sheepishly, swinging his arms forward.“Starting tomorrow, we only have classes until the fourth period.”“Why do we still have classes until the fourth period after the exam?”“They’ll mostly play movies. You can sleep if you want.”“You slept even before that.”“Why are you picking a fight….”On their way home. They talked non-stop as they walked. They said high school seniors after the exam were like horses with their reins removed. Now, there was no need to go to school at dawn for morning self-study. They could go at nine and leave by noon. Going home early was nice, but Yeonwoo felt a bit sentimental.“…Hey, Choi Sungwoon.”“Yeah?”“Come to my house even if school ends early.”Yeonwoo hesitated for a while, making Sungwoon wonder what he was going to say, but it was just that. Sungwoon chuckled and draped his arm over Yeonwoo’s shoulder. He didn’t resist and stayed quietly, as if used to it.“Of course. I’ll live there.”“It’s too cramped. You can’t stay over.”“Why? We can sleep hugging each other.”“What?”“Just kidding. You looked really scared.”Sungwoon playfully flicked Yeonwoo’s forehead. Yeonwoo didn’t even realize his cheeks were burning red.“If you’re free on Saturday, let’s go to the reservoir.”“The reservoir?”“Yeah. It’s just a short bus ride away, and the night view is supposed to be amazing.”Yeonwoo had never been to the reservoir, but he didn’t care where they went as long as it was with Sungwoon. He nodded without much thought.“It’s huge. Isn’t this a river?”The reservoir was much larger than Yeonwoo had imagined. Plants of unknown names floated on the not-so-clear water. Yeonwoo leaned against the wooden railing, watching the rippling surface.“Want to walk around?”“Sure.”The sign said it took about an hour to walk around. It was 2 PM now, so even if they took the full hour, it would be 3 PM. They stepped onto the wooden deck that marked the start of the trail.“This is amazing.”“The night view is even better.”“I should bring Grandma next time.”“Let’s come together.”“Grandma can’t walk much. Her back hurts.”“It’s okay. I’ll carry her.”It was a simple conversation, but it made them happy. They walked, laughing constantly. There’s a saying about the cold snap during college entrance exams. It always got cold around that time. The wind was so biting it felt like it was cutting through their skin, but they managed. The old winter coat that had gotten Yeonwoo through many winters was holding up this year too.“Stand there.”There were several spots along the trail perfect for taking photos. There wasn’t a single person around, probably due to the cold weather. Sungwoon pushed Yeonwoo gently, and Yeonwoo found himself standing with the reservoir behind him.“Smile.”Sungwoon tilted his phone and snapped a few shots. The wide reservoir, the yellow reeds, the sparkling water in the sunlight, and Yeonwoo in the middle—all of it was beautiful. Sungwoon’s gaze softened.“This is kind of tiring.”“You should exercise more.”“But we walked for an hour.”“A day is 24 hours.”Sungwoon never conceded a point. Yeonwoo secretly pouted and glared at him. Sungwoon, stretching from the refreshing walk, draped his arm over Yeonwoo’s shoulder again.“Let’s stay at the café until sunset.”“Until five?”“Yeah. It’s three-thirty now.”“Okay… sure.”In late November, sunset came quickly after five. Yeonwoo remembered the café near the start of the trail. He wanted to see the fountain in the beautifully landscaped garden up close. Yeonwoo agreed readily.“Wow. You can see the whole reservoir from here.”“That’s why this place is really popular.”“But it’s empty today.”“Because it’s really cold today.”“That makes sense….”Yeonwoo accepted without adding more. Soon, their drinks and cake arrived. Yeonwoo ordered lemonade, and Sungwoon had kiwi juice. Yeonwoo also chose the cake, trying carrot cake for the first time.“Is it good?”“It doesn’t taste like carrot at all.”“If it did, no one would buy it.”Sungwoon didn’t touch the cake. Thanks to that, Yeonwoo ate until he was full and smiled contentedly. Sungwoon, who hadn’t drunk half of his juice, chuckled as he watched him.“The sun is setting!”It felt like only a short while had passed, but dusk had already fallen. In ten minutes, it would be completely dark. Yeonwoo excitedly pointed out the window and shouted.“Shall we go out?”Sungwoon picked up a napkin and wiped the cream off Yeonwoo’s lips. Yeonwoo’s face turned as red as a beet.“Let’s go. To see the night view.”“…Okay.”The night view was beautiful enough from inside, but it was different outside. Sungwoon took a deep breath as he watched Yeonwoo walk ahead.“This is driving me crazy….”Muttering to himself, Sungwoon pounded his chest a couple of times with his fist and hurried after Yeonwoo.“Shall we sit there?”“Sure.”Darkness quickly enveloped everything. Leaving the café, they headed back to the reservoir and found the best spot to view the night scenery, sitting on a bench. The light from an unknown building across the water reflected perfectly on the reservoir. Yeonwoo’s mouth formed an ‘O.’“The building is reflected perfectly in the water.”“Yeah, it looks like an underwater city.”“It’s so beautiful.”In truth, Sungwoon wasn’t particularly interested in the night view. He had been to this place often since moving to the neighborhood and wasn’t the type to be moved by scenery. While Yeonwoo was mesmerized by the sparkling night view, Sungwoon took the opportunity to gaze at Yeonwoo. His long eyelashes fluttered with each blink, his smooth nose, and his clear skin, showing even the fine hairs…. He tried to stop looking, but his eyes kept drifting back. His heart raced as if he were going crazy.“Aren’t you cold?”“No, I’m fine.”Eventually, Yeonwoo stood up and headed to the wooden railing. Leaning on the dusty railing, he took in the vast reservoir. The buildings reflecting their lights on the black water were fascinating.“Choi Sungwoon, come here.”Yeonwoo waved his hand, calling Sungwoon over. Worried that Yeonwoo’s coat didn’t look warm enough, Sungwoon quickly approached him. Yeonwoo, smiling widely, pointed to the middle of the reservoir.“There are fish over there.”“Where?”“There!”“I can’t see them.”“They’re right there, next to the floating leaves.”“Oh, there?”Sungwoon didn’t care much about the fish, but seeing Yeonwoo excited, he played along. He extended his finger in the direction Yeonwoo pointed. He couldn’t see any fish, just the dark water.“No, a little to the side.”“…….”Frustrated that Sungwoon couldn’t find the fish, Yeonwoo covered Sungwoon’s hand with his palm and pulled it to the left. The moment their warmth touched, Sungwoon’s body stiffened.“Do you see them?”“…….”“Can’t you see?”“…….”“There are two fish right there. Why can’t you see them?”Yeonwoo’s focus was solely on the fish. No matter how much noise Sungwoon made beside him, he didn’t respond. Meanwhile, the fish swam away. Yeonwoo, disappointed, removed his hand from Sungwoon’s.“…….”“Shall we walk around again?”“Sure.”Yeonwoo flitted around like a butterfly, alternating between the clear buildings and their blurred reflections in the water. Sungwoon clenched his fist and pounded his chest several times. His heart felt like it was going to leap out of his throat.“Why is the bus interval an hour? That’s ridiculous.”“Do we have to wait here?”“This is the only bus stop.”There was a problem. They had missed the bus home right before their eyes. They thought they would wait for the next bus for twenty or thirty minutes, but since it was a rural area, the bus interval was an hour. Having just seen the bus leave, they now had to wait exactly an hour. The rural street, sparsely lit by streetlights, looked eerie at night.“Shall we walk?”“All the way home?”“Yeah.”“It’ll take an hour.”“I’m fine. If you’re tired, we can wait.”“Then let’s walk.”Despite having already walked around the reservoir twice, Yeonwoo suggested walking home. Sungwoon, who prided himself on his stamina, readily agreed.“When I was little, Grandma used to carry me around the neighborhood. It feels just like that.”“You’re a bad grandson, making Grandma’s back hurt.”“I was light back then.”Yeonwoo pouted at the accusation of being a bad grandson. Sungwoon laughed silently. Well, he was still light now. Yeonwoo, seemingly very fond of the reservoir, chattered away with his flushed cheeks.“Choi Sungwoon.”“What?”“Choi Sungwoon.”“Oh, what?”There wasn’t a single car on the dark street. With no sidewalk, they walked in the middle of the road, marked with a 30 km/h speed limit. The road was lined with widely spaced streetlights, bugs flying under the bright lights, and the sound of the wind rustling the fields. Yeonwoo called Sungwoon twice as he walked energetically, looking straight ahead.“You asked me what my dream was before.”“Yeah. You said it was to buy a washing machine, then an apartment.”“You remember.”Sungwoon remembered exactly, and Yeonwoo smiled, his eyes crinkling. The wind blew fiercely from the front, making it hard to keep his eyes open. Wearing a thin, old coat, Yeonwoo seemed unfazed by the wind and continued excitedly.“Actually… I had another dream.”“What is it?”As he answered, Sungwoon glanced at Yeonwoo’s outfit. He had noticed earlier that the coat looked very thin. He had probably worn it through previous winters and would do so again this year.“To die.”“…What?”Sungwoon, matching Yeonwoo’s pace, stopped walking. His eyes narrowed. Yeonwoo, smiling brightly as usual, pulled Sungwoon’s arm.“Let’s talk while we walk.”“…….”“When Grandma dies, I planned to follow her.”“…….”“Sometimes, on really tough days, I even thought… I shouldn’t, but… when will Grandma die?”“…….”“I have to wait for Grandma to die so I can die too. I can’t leave her behind.”“…….”“Like you said, I guess I’m a bad grandson.”Yeonwoo spoke calmly. How many people would answer “death” when asked about their dream? Especially a nineteen-year-old. Sungwoon couldn’t fathom the feelings that led to such a dream, so he kept his heavy mouth shut.“But these days, I don’t want to die.”“…….”“I want Grandma to live a long, healthy life. I’ve never thought about the future before, but now I’m starting to. It’s a bit late, but….”The faint streetlight cast long shadows of the two. Sungwoon clenched his fist in his pocket.“It’s because of you.”“…….”“Thank you.”“…….”Yeonwoo’s words required a response, but somehow Sungwoon’s lips felt glued shut. He rubbed his face with his cold hands. His lips were parched.“Once we graduate, we won’t see each other as much….”“…….”“But please hang out with me. You’re my only friend.”Yeonwoo’s usually bright voice faltered a bit. He glanced sideways at the silent Sungwoon. He had been thinking about it a lot. At first, he thought he wanted to see Sungwoon because Jaeyul’s gang wouldn’t bully him when Sungwoon was around. But over time, he realized he simply enjoyed being with him. The thought of drifting apart after graduation had kept him up at night. So this is what friendship feels like, he thought.“If you don’t want to… I understand.”He had mustered the courage to speak, but Sungwoon remained silent. Regret and sadness welled up inside Yeonwoo. He rubbed his reddened nose with the back of his hand and cleared his throat. The cold weather didn’t help. Maybe suggesting they walk was a bad idea. All sorts of thoughts swirled in his mind.“…….”Suddenly, his back felt warm. Yeonwoo’s eyes widened in surprise. Sungwoon had taken off his coat and draped it over Yeonwoo. Without a word, he buttoned it from the bottom up. Now wearing two coats, Yeonwoo looked like a fluffy sheep and sniffled.“Hey… you wear it.”“I’m really cold.”“If you give this to me, what about you?”“I was born in winter, so I don’t get cold easily.”“That’s nonsense. Take it back.”Yeonwoo hurriedly tried to take off the coat, but Sungwoon stopped him. Wearing only a thin sweater, Sungwoon grabbed Yeonwoo’s wrist and pulled him forward, as if urging him to hurry.“Hey….”“Hey.”“What?”Sungwoon, holding Yeonwoo’s wrist, walked straight ahead. He seemed upset, so Yeonwoo cautiously watched him. Sungwoon’s pace, which had always matched Yeonwoo’s, quickened. Yeonwoo panted as he tried to keep up.“You really get on my nerves. You know that?”“…….”“You really get on my nerves.”Sungwoon’s voice was hard. Yeonwoo’s neck tensed as he kept his mouth shut. It seemed confessing his true feelings today had been a mistake. Maybe he had taken Sungwoon’s kindness for granted. Yeonwoo, head bowed, spoke in a small voice.“…I’m sorry.”“Ha….”“Sorry.”“Are you an idiot?”“…….”“Ah, you fool… really….”Finally, Sungwoon stopped walking. Yeonwoo hung his head low and rubbed his stinging eyes with the back of his hand.“If you don’t want to, just say so. Why curse at me?”“…….”“Forget I said anything. I’m sorry.”Even though he tried to hide it, his voice was full of sorrow. Sungwoon, looking at Yeonwoo’s slightly trembling back, let out a bitter laugh.“Hey.”“…….”A faint sob came from Yeonwoo, who was waddling in two coats. Sungwoon couldn’t help but chuckle. Whether he heard it or not, Yeonwoo was drowning in regret, thinking he had lost his only friend by saying something unnecessary.“Hey, Hong Yeonwoo.”“…….”Sungwoon still held Yeonwoo’s wrist. Looking down at their joined hands, Sungwoon sighed. His voice carried a hint of the wind.“It means I like you, idiot….”The sound of sniffling suddenly stopped. Yeonwoo’s pulse was palpable through his wrist. Sungwoon used his free hand to cover the back of his neck. At that moment, he was grateful for the wide spacing between the streetlights. His whole body felt like it was going to burst from the heat. Even without his coat, he wasn’t cold; he felt like he was on fire.“Choi Sung….”“Don’t respond.”Sungwoon, always confident, cut Yeonwoo off as if scared. Yeonwoo stared at him, wide-eyed, and Sungwoon, still holding Yeonwoo’s wrist, resumed walking.“I’m really having a hard time right now, so don’t respond.”“…….”“So, I, damn it, I.”“…….”“I think I like you.”“…….”“No, I do like you. I’m sure.”A hiccup escaped Yeonwoo. His throat moved as he swallowed hard. Sungwoon, walking a step ahead, suddenly screamed into the air. Yeonwoo cursed his persistent hiccups and held his breath.“Don’t let go for a moment.”“…….”“Just for a moment….”The warmth that had been on his wrist moved to his palm. Sungwoon, holding Yeonwoo’s hand, couldn’t calm his wildly beating heart and breathed heavily. Hand in hand, they walked the rural street very slowly, without saying a word.They had expected the walk to take an hour, but they reached the first fork in the road in less than forty minutes. Sungwoon walked half a step ahead, with Yeonwoo hurrying behind, holding his hand tightly. Sweat trickled down Yeonwoo’s back under the layers of coats.“Go inside.”“Oh….”Turning toward his house on the right, Sungwoon told him to go inside, but didn’t let go of his hand. Yeonwoo, hesitating, gently shook their joined hands in the air.“Ah!”“Ah!”Realizing he was still holding Yeonwoo’s hand, Sungwoon’s face turned bright red, and he let out a strange scream. Startled by the sudden shout, Yeonwoo also let out a short cry.“I told you not to let go for a moment!”“…….”“What are you doing still holding it?”“…….”It was absurd. Who had been gripping tightly enough to make their hand sweat? Sungwoon was acting like the one who farted was getting angry. Yeonwoo wanted to say something, but he decided against it, seeing Sungwoon’s face flush with heat.“Go inside. It’s late.”“Hey, Choi Sung….”“Don’t talk. Don’t talk!”“Hey, how do you know what I’m going to say?”“I don’t know. Just don’t talk. Don’t.”Sungwoon couldn’t look at Yeonwoo’s face and glared at the empty air instead. Yeonwoo, equally flustered, didn’t know what to say to his awkwardness. It was like watching a broken wooden doll.“Hurry up and go inside.”“Can I talk tomorrow?”“…….”“Then we’ll talk tomorrow.”“Okay.”“Alright. I had fun today. Bye.”“Yeah.”Sungwoon never looked at Yeonwoo until the end. Yeonwoo turned first and walked away on the left path. Sungwoon watched his retreating figure for a long time, trying to cool down his heated face.After arriving home and taking a shower, it was already time for bed. Lying on the neatly made bed, Yeonwoo stared at the ceiling for a while, reflecting on the day. Then, he gently called out to his grandmother, who was lying with her back to him.“Grandma, are you asleep?”“No, I’m not.”“I have something I’m curious about.”“What are you curious about?”“Um….”Actually, he had thought she was asleep and just wanted to say something, but now that he had to speak, it wasn’t easy. Fidgeting with the edge of the blanket, Yeonwoo turned his back to his grandmother. It felt easier to talk while facing the wall.“Grandma, what’s the difference between liking a friend and liking a lover?”Nineteen. It might seem childish for a young man on the brink of adulthood to ask, but for Yeonwoo, who had never had a friend or a lover, it was a natural curiosity. Having spent his school days lonely and scared without a single friend, and his life in the cozy neighborhood with his grandmother, Yeonwoo couldn’t distinguish even the most basic emotions.“They’re very different.”“How are they different?”Grandma and Yeonwoo talked while facing the wall, their backs to each other. Yeonwoo did it to hide his embarrassment, and Grandma understood her grandson’s feelings.“Well, that’s something Yeonwoo has to experience for himself.”“Just give me a rough idea.”A soft laugh came from behind him. Even in the dark room, Yeonwoo could feel his face heating up. He clutched the edge of the blanket tightly.“Does our Yeonwoo have someone he likes?”“No! It’s not like that…! I was just, just suddenly curious….”His words sped up, sounding flustered. Grandma spoke gently, as if she understood everything.“When you like someone, you want to see them every day.”Want to see them every day…. He remembered the day Sungwoon was absent. How he had looked at the empty seat all day. Yeonwoo thought deeply, then shook his head. It was too soon to judge based on just one day.“What else?”“Well…. It’s fun to be with them.”It’s fun to be with them. That was true. It was always fun to be with Sungwoon. So much fun that it made him happy to the point of tears. Yeonwoo’s nose wrinkled.“But I have fun with Grandma too.”“That’s different.”“…Is it?”“This is something Yeonwoo has to figure out for himself. Grandma can’t teach you.”Grandma, who always seemed to have the answers, gave an unexpected reply. She couldn’t teach him…. Yeonwoo’s eyes drooped sadly.“You have school tomorrow. Go to sleep, dear.”Grandma found it endearing that the baby who once couldn’t even open his eyes was now nineteen and pondering love. She reached back and gently patted Yeonwoo’s bottom.“Grandma.”“Grandma’s asleep.”“How can you answer if you’re asleep?”“Grandma can answer even while sleeping.”Yeonwoo, who had turned over, wiggled his lips and lay on his back, staring at the ceiling. In the dark void, Sungwoon’s face appeared.‘I think I like you.’‘No, I do like you. I’m sure.’Waves crashed in his once-calm heart. His stomach churned, making his hands and feet tingle. Taking a deep breath, Yeonwoo called out to his grandmother again.“Grandma, can you feel excited when you see a friend?”“Hmm?”“Your heart races, and, um… your body feels hot….”“…….”“Your stomach churns, you feel like you’re going to be sick, and sometimes you feel like crying….”“…….”“Does that happen too?”For some reason, Grandma didn’t answer. The sound of his pounding heart filled the small room. His chest felt tight, and his stomach churned.“Yeonwoo, you have someone you like.”“…….”“That’s what it means to like someone.”His wildly beating heart suddenly calmed down. His frantic breathing stopped too. The edge of the blanket slipped from Yeonwoo’s hand.“Our little boy has grown up.”Grandma also slowly turned to lie on her back, looking at the ceiling. The sound of his heart, which he thought had stopped, started beating again.“…Yeah.”“Yeah?”“I have someone I like.”There was nothing to hide from Grandma. It had always been that way, and it would continue to be. Yeonwoo’s lips curled up slightly. If Grandma was right, then it was right. If Grandma liked something, he liked it too.“But, Grandma.”“Yes.”“I’m a guy… what if the person I like is also a guy?”It was something he might have hidden from others, but Yeonwoo told Grandma honestly. She was his only family, his only ally in the world. There was nothing to fear in front of her. After a brief silence, Grandma placed her wrinkled hand over Yeonwoo’s.“You like Sungwoon?”“…….”“Grandma is right, isn’t she?”“Yeah….”But he couldn’t help feeling embarrassed. His neck felt hot. If he measured his temperature, it would surely be over 40 degrees. Yeonwoo pushed the blanket off his body.“You’ll catch a cold. Cover up and sleep.”“It’s too hot right now.”“Then I’ll cover you later.”“Okay.”Grandma rolled up the blanket Yeonwoo had kicked off. Then she looked at him, wearing a black T-shirt from a village hall she didn’t even know and checked pajamas bought for three thousand won at the market. She smiled, her eyes crinkling, and called him.“Sweetie.”“Yes.”“It doesn’t matter if it’s a man or a woman when it comes to liking someone.”“But men don’t usually like men.”“There are many people like that.”“I’ve never seen one.”“This village is small. There aren’t any here.”“Really…. So there are many in Seoul?”“There are many even in the city.”“I see.”Yeonwoo’s voice gained strength. Grandma gently brushed Yeonwoo’s bangs off his forehead with her palm. His eyelashes fluttered.“But does Sungwoon like you too?”“Huh?”“Is it one-sided?”Yeonwoo couldn’t help but smile foolishly.“No. Choi Sungwoon likes me too.”“Really?”“Yes. Grandma, I like Choi Sungwoon too.”“That’s good. Our Yeonwoo is an adult now.”“Grandma, I’m cold again.”“Cover up with the blanket.”“How can a man like another man, or that homosexuality isn’t love….” Such profound topics were too steep and beautiful for the hillside neighborhood. Grandma spread the blanket over Yeonwoo’s body, offering silent comfort to her grandson who was about to embark on a difficult love.⟡˖ ࣪“He’s late….”Usually, Sungwoon arrived first and waited for Yeonwoo, but today, for some reason, Yeonwoo arrived much earlier. He didn’t have a watch, so he wasn’t sure, but he guessed he had been waiting for about ten minutes, and Sungwoon still hadn’t shown up. He started to worry that something might have happened. Hugging the coat he was going to return to Sungwoon, Yeonwoo sniffled in the biting wind and looked around.“…….”Yeonwoo’s eyes narrowed as he turned his head. The figure sticking out from behind the distant utility pole was definitely Sungwoon. The brown cardigan was also his. Tilting his head, Yeonwoo approached him. The large figure flinched.“What are you doing there?”“…Hi.”Sungwoon was standing behind the utility pole. Yeonwoo let out a helpless laugh. Judging by his red fingers, he had been standing there for quite a while.“Why are you standing here?”“I just got here.”“Don’t lie.”“It’s true. You’re calling me a liar.”“Your hands are red.”“No, they’re really hot. It’s a burn.”His shameless attitude was the same as usual, but his flushed face and evasive gaze were not like him. Yeonwoo glared at him and spoke.“Are you embarrassed because you confessed to me yesterday?”“Ugh….”Sungwoon, who had been pretending not to know, suddenly coughed. Surprised, Yeonwoo widened his eyes and patted his back. Sungwoon’s earlobes were literally tomato-red as he leaned against the utility pole.“There’s nothing wrong with liking someone, so why are you embarrassed?”“…….”Yeonwoo spoke with a stern expression, like a teacher scolding a child. He patted Sungwoon’s back with one hand and furrowed his brows, chattering away. Watching him, Sungwoon roughly rubbed his lips with the back of his hand.“Just pretend you didn’t hear it.”“…….”Liking another man was never easy. He had spent many sleepless nights worrying about it. It had taken him a long time to accept that the excitement, heartache, and concern he felt for Yeonwoo were love. He regretted his hasty confession, thinking about how much more difficult it must have been for Yeonwoo to face it suddenly. With his face flushed, Sungwoon fanned himself with his hand and spoke softly. Yeonwoo’s furrowed brows slowly relaxed.“Why?”“Just. Pretend you didn’t hear it.”Sungwoon started walking first. Hugging the thick coat, Yeonwoo quickly followed him.“Don’t you like me?”“Ugh….”Sungwoon coughed again at the blunt question. Regardless, Yeonwoo’s expression remained serious. Sungwoon’s wandering gaze slowly settled on Yeonwoo’s face.“…Hey.”“Yeah.”“I’m not gay.”“I am.”“You might think it’s disgusting, damn it….”“…….”“Ah….”Sungwoon lowered his head, finding it hard to speak. Yeonwoo kept quiet and waited patiently for him, who seemed unusually scared and confused.“I like you.”“…….”