My Company Is Black

#039

Lee Gyo-ha felt wronged about this too. How could you block a fellow regressor just because of one kiss? Are we supposed to break up after just one kiss? Aren’t we fate companions? Try regressing a hundred times. I’ll chase you to the other side of the earth all hundred times…

However, Jung Hwi-kyung did not return to Lee Gyo-ha’s officetel. When Hwi-kyung didn’t come to work the next day either, Marcia started openly blaming Gyo-ha.

“Ah, if only Hwi-kyung-ssi were here, we’d finish cleaning the teacups quickly…”

“…”

“With my bad back, how did I end up repotting plants alone…”

Gyo-ha, who was getting the cold shoulder from Marcia instead of the absent Hwi-kyung, could only cry inwardly. Even when Marcia pressed him about what he had done wrong to Hwi-kyung, Gyo-ha couldn’t answer.

I kissed that person suddenly. Well, it wasn’t intentional, and I don’t know why I suddenly used my tongue, but that’s what happened?

If he said this, Marcia would surely leave with Hwi-kyung that very day. Young master! Kissing without permission is sexual harassment! Gyo-ha fully agreed with that statement. But the lighting, temperature, and humidity all created a situation where he couldn’t help but kiss.

Is this really entirely my fault? Hwi-kyung suddenly looked pretty, you know? Gyo-ha trembled with indignation while drinking the green tea Marcia had brewed. Wasn’t it Hwi-kyung’s fault for showing his vulnerable side only to him? In Gyo-ha’s view, this was mutual fault.

But Hwi-kyung clearly thought differently from Gyo-ha. Otherwise, he wouldn’t ignore the possibility of forced regression like this.

Gyo-ha was not going to work at the entertainment company despite Jung-hye’s nagging, wanting to see Hwi-kyung come to work, but it seemed Hwi-kyung was determined to be absent.

“Just apologize unconditionally and sincerely.”

“I can’t apologize because I’ve been blocked.”

“Oh my, this is why young people these days are hopeless! Don’t apologize through messenger, go and apologize in person!”

“He told me never to come to his house again…”

“This is so frustrating!”

Marcia pestered Gyo-ha to make up with Hwi-kyung quickly. Lee Gyo-ha was the one who was truly frustrated. With Hwi-kyung not by his side, anxiety about not knowing when he might move to the next cycle suddenly surged.

It would be fortunate if only such anxiety arose; Gyo-ha’s heart ached, feeling rejected by Hwi-kyung. Throughout Lee Gyo-ha’s life, there had never been anyone he couldn’t win over with his wealth and looks…

…Win over?

Thinking this far, Gyo-ha suddenly raised his head. He was thinking and surprising himself. Win over what? Jung Hwi-kyung? Lee Gyo-ha stopped drinking his green tea and slapped his forehead again.

“Oh my, don’t blame yourself too much…”

“…”

“You can fight with your lover in life, you know.”

Realization came like a wave. Lee Gyo-ha, who had been standing barefoot on the beach without a thought, floundered like someone drowning up to their neck in the sea with this emotional realization.

“You know what?”

“Yes?”

“I think I… like Jung Hwi-kyung-ssi?”

“What? Of course you do, right?”

“No, I think I really like him.”

“I suppose so, right?”

Marcia, who thought the two were already dating, accepted Gyo-ha’s words as a matter of course. As they say, the ground hardens after rain; she seemed to think the young master was newly realizing his feelings for his lover after their quarrel.

But Lee Gyo-ha became really serious. Since when? Of course, since meeting Jung Hwi-kyung, Gyo-ha had been thinking about him day and night.

From their first meeting, Hwi-kyung had made an impact. After all, Jung Hwi-kyung was the only regressor with a system window to appear in Lee Gyo-ha’s life.

When they held hands, he felt an electric current, and when he was pushed against the wall in the emergency stairway, his heart raced. Gyo-ha thought it was the effect of regression. That there was something connecting fellow regressors, which made him worry about Jung Hwi-kyung even when he was on the opposite side of the earth.

However, Lee Gyo-ha’s actions had indeed been excessive. It was strange that he suddenly returned to Korea, chasing after Jung Hwi-kyung when he should have been busy taking care of himself.

Hiring Hwi-kyung outright wasn’t normal either. Gyo-ha was a person with common sense, even if he was a bit airheaded. But when it came to matters related to Hwi-kyung, he acted without considering the consequences, even knowing there would be repercussions. He just wanted to be of help somehow.

Gyo-ha seriously rubbed his forehead. It was really surprising that he only now realized he liked Hwi-kyung, even though he wasn’t inexperienced in dating. He hadn’t been this oblivious even in his teenage years.

He hadn’t even suspected it because he had never liked someone on equal terms before. Living among people who reacted like parrots in similar ways with each regression, he had forgotten what it felt like to romantically like someone.

“Would you like some more green tea?”

Marcia gestured towards Gyo-ha’s empty teacup. Gyo-ha shook his head, saying it was fine, and slowly stood up.

Thinking about it, it was a natural attraction. Gyo-ha hadn’t gotten a job at different companies in each cycle like Hwi-kyung. Until the thirteenth cycle, Lee Gyo-ha had circled between graduate school and agencies.

Everything was predictable there. At some point, Gyo-ha could even imitate the agency director’s words down to the intonation. No matter how Gyo-ha acted, people mostly moved within set patterns.

There were occasionally people who acted freshly, but even that fell into similar tracks in the next cycle. That was also why Gyo-ha frequently caused trouble in the thirteenth cycle.

Not America but Korea, new environment and unfamiliar people… Gyo-ha experienced non-repetitive reactions for the first time beside a ‘real’ regressor. In Lee Gyo-ha’s world, only Jung Hwi-kyung could show different reactions at every moment now.

So he couldn’t help but be fixated on Hwi-kyung, knowingly or unknowingly. Moreover, Jung Hwi-kyung kept showing his vulnerable side only to Gyo-ha. Because in Jung Hwi-kyung’s world, only Gyo-ha was ‘real’.

That’s what it meant to experience a repeating world together with memories intact. Gyo-ha let out a long sigh. He was now aware of his hopeless one-sided love.

Jung Hwi-kyung would never like Lee Gyo-ha, even if he died and came back to life. At least, that’s what Gyo-ha thought. Excluding the merit of being a fellow regressor, Gyo-ha wasn’t someone Hwi-kyung would like.

The two were too different. Hwi-kyung was an ordinary citizen who had to worry about money at every moment, living as if being chased while constantly worrying about the future. But Gyo-ha was a bourgeois who had never worried about money. He had never really worried about his future either.

Not only their family backgrounds but also their growth environments were completely different. While Hwi-kyung hadn’t been able to go to America even once during his fourteen cycles, Gyo-ha was now more familiar with America than Korea. Unlike Hwi-kyung, who had become accustomed to taking care of others while directly nursing his grandmother, Gyo-ha had grown up being served by others as if it were natural from birth.

From the perspective of Lee Gyo-ha, who was excellent at grasping the situation, Jung Hwi-kyung might like Gyo-ha’s money but would find it difficult to like Gyo-ha himself. Look even now. Gyo-ha had kissed Hwi-kyung thoughtlessly, and Hwi-kyung had run away in shock.

After considering various conditions and situations, Gyo-ha concluded that he should not let Hwi-kyung know about his feelings. It was problematic to be too good at understanding the situation.

* * *

Hwi-kyung sat in the hospital room, watching a trot competition program with a dazed expression. He was so preoccupied with the fact that he had been absent from work for three days that he couldn’t properly focus on the television screen.

Anyway, Jung Hwi-kyung already knew the results of this program. The winner of this season is Kim Tae-pung. This was a fact that had never changed even after fourteen regressions.

“I hope Kim Tae-pung wins.”

Hwi-kyung’s grandmother, unaware of this fixed fact, muttered that she hoped Kim Tae-pung would win the competition. Hwi-kyung reflexively started to say, “Kim Tae-pung will win anyway,” but held his tongue.

A rich voice and brilliant vocal techniques, plus a handsome face that made all middle-aged and elderly people cheer, and a heart-wrenching backstory to boot. Kim Tae-pung enjoyed the highest popularity even after the trot program had run for three seasons.

“The kid grew up struggling, so I hope he does well.”

“I think he will. He sings well, doesn’t he?”

“Ah, you never know. What if he disappears like a comet?”

What comet? Hwi-kyung looked at Kim Tae-pung on the screen, who was “firing a killer wink at the noonas!” His popularity was truly like a typhoon. It seemed true that people live up to their names.

The program passes quickly, but Kim Tae-pung will continue to thrive in the future. In all the cycles Hwi-kyung remembered, Kim Tae-pung bought an apartment with a view of the Han River in cash, without any major controversy. Hwi-kyung shed tears of blood seeing that news.

Instead of buying an apartment, you should hold more concerts… Your ticket prices are honestly too expensive…

“Kyung-ah.”

“Yes?”

“Did something happen?”

“…”

“I thought I got the date wrong, but it’s Thursday today. Why aren’t you at work and here instead?”

“…I missed you, Grandma.”

“Oh my, you can see your old granny after work too.”

A wrinkled hand cupped Hwi-kyung’s cheek. Hwi-kyung felt like he might burst into tears because of that hand touching his cheek.

Grandma, I’m having such a hard time… He wanted to cry loudly in his grandmother’s arms like an ignorant child. He wanted to pour out his situation that she wouldn’t understand even if he explained.

But he couldn’t do that. Because Grandma was sick. Hwi-kyung knew well how quickly cancer cells spread in that small body. The maximum time Hwi-kyung could spend with his grandmother right after regression was 3 years. At the shortest, his grandmother passed away just after a year had passed.

You can see her anytime? When he regressed and came back, his grandmother was always alive. But could this really be called being alive?

Unlike the empty-headed Gyo-ha, Hwi-kyung’s head was full of noise. There were too many things to worry about, too many things to care about. He couldn’t think simply. Hwi-kyung was always desperate.

“Grandma.”

“Yes?”

“You’ll live for a long time, right?”

“Of course.”

“…”

“How could I close my eyes leaving my puppy behind?”

A repeated conversation. After Kim Tae-pung’s victory and concert, Hwi-kyung’s grandmother dies within a few months or years. This was a future Hwi-kyung couldn’t avoid no matter what he did.

If only the workplace changes no matter how many times he goes back, what on earth is he going back to the past for?

Hwi-kyung watched Kim Tae-pung win the first round of competition by a large margin, hiding his empty expression. He had watched this scene seven times so far.

Now he could reflexively recall the clothes Kim Tae-pung wore and his acceptance speech. Nothing changes this time either…

Our program is sponsored by BK Entertainment.

Nothing?

Hwi-kyung sat up straight in surprise. What’s that? Even after rubbing his eyes several times, the caption at the end of the program didn’t disappear.

“Why BK Entertainment…”

“Hm?”

“This has never happened before.”

“What’s this entertainment thing you’re talking about? Your face suddenly turned pale.”

Hwi-kyung, who had unconsciously jumped to his feet, rushed out of the hospital room. Come to think of it, wasn’t his grandmother watching this trot program when Gyo-ha first came to the hospital?

Hwi-kyung wanted to grab Gyo-ha right away and ask. Did you change the moment that seemed would never change, that kept repeating?