NOVEL ONLINE FREE Chapter 29
It was midnight.
“Ugh…!”
I woke up with a start. The cool wind brushing against my skin was quite unpleasant.
“Where… is this…?”
The hardened earth cracked between the logs. The familiar Wailing Wall was right before my eyes.
I was in the trench. It was quiet all around. The sounds of grasshoppers I used to hear were absent here. Although there was a forest nearby, it was only natural for everything to be reduced to ashes on the battlefield.
I noticed the soldiers on both sides of me lying still with eyes closed like they were dead. I cautiously raised my arm and checked my wristwatch.
It was exactly three o’clock at dawn. A time that seemed oddly familiar.
Splash. Splash.
‘That sound….’
A squelching noise. The sound of carefully moving feet through the muck. The effort to make as little sound as possible was commendable, but it was futile in a pit that was even worse than a doghouse.
Although it was still dawn, my mind was extremely sensitive and sharp. A razor-sharp mind born from extreme exhaustion allowed me to hear things that I wouldn’t usually catch.
I strained my ears again. The noise I had just heard began to return faintly.
Splash. Splash. Splash.
Mud. Puddles. Trench. And, military boots.
Everything clicked together in my mind to form a single piece of information.
It was the enemy. And they were very close.
I thought I could even hear whispering. I was certain.
It was the enemy. The foe had slipped into our trench.
That meant, that meant….
“……”
It was a night raid. They had ambushed us under the cover of darkness.
I had no idea what the sentry was doing. Perhaps he had fallen to them. What was certain at that moment was that the enemy had stealthily entered our trench.
I quietly rose my body. I slowly lifted the firearm that was lying next to me. My finger resting on the trigger trembled with extreme tension.
Thinking I might fire it just like that, I quickly removed my finger from the trigger. My palm, soaked in sweat, felt slippery.
The footsteps were growing closer. I even considered shouting.
Shouting on the battlefield was nearly an act of suicide. Instead of panicking foolishly, I gently tapped the two soldiers sleeping beside me to wake them.
“Ughgh…! What is it, Head Priest….”
“Ah, I was sleeping so well. Why did you wake me? Is something wrong?”
“Shh…! Quiet…!”
As I swiftly put my finger to my lips, their expressions changed immediately. With hardened faces, they quickly shouldered their rifles and came closer to me.
“What is it? Is it the enemy?”
“Yeah. Listen carefully.”
Splash. Splash. Splash.
The weighty sound of footsteps had audibly intensified. Perhaps having heard the footsteps as well, the soldiers’ expressions also stiffened.
“Damn…. Which crazy bastards came in without a care?”
“Could it be dwarves? The heavy footsteps suggest they’re not those little earpickers.”
“Shh…! Maintain prayer positions, everyone fix your bayonets. If we get discovered, it’ll be the end.”
The soldiers fell silent. I quietly gripped my rifle.
I was tense. My heart felt like it might burst. I was afraid. An indescribable fear enveloped me. I feared that my heartbeat might be heard.
Splash. Splash.
Now it was really too close to turn back. I knew the footsteps were alarmingly near.
The three of us pressed our backs against the trench wall. Once we turned this corner, the enemy would be right in front of us. The thought quickened my breathing.
I clenched my teeth and held my breath. Not a single sound could escape. The soldiers hiding on either side whispered urgently with tense expressions.
“Damn…! Head Priest, should we stab them with the bayonets? Should we jump out and kill them right now?”
“What happened to Anderson? That should be his post now…!”
“Those bastards…! If they killed Anderson…. I’ll beat them until they beg for their lives…!”
“Shh! They’re coming…!”
Splash. Splash.
Splash!
A dark figure finally emerged. It was about the height of my chest, and I was sure that they were the dwarves’ vanguard.
“Now! Kill them!”
“Uaaaah!”
“You damn filthy little dwarves!”
Thud! Thud! Thwack! Smash!
The bayonets made horrifying sounds as they bore into flesh. The soldiers and I frantically stabbed at that black thing.
We mercilessly thrust the bayonets, kicked, and elbowed in presumed vital areas, but how long had it been?
Having driven the bayonet into what I assumed was its throat, the figure staggered and then fell to the ground without a scream. The soldiers and I gasped for breath, staring at it with bloodshot eyes.
“Ahh… Hah….”
“C-Crap…! Is it dead?”
“Haah… Damn, it’s too dark to see anything….”
I hesitated for a moment. Should I use my divine power to illuminate the darkness? My hesitation became pointless.
The moonlight, hidden behind the clouds, gradually revealed itself.
And we could see.
“No, what….”
“What the….”
A red deer, brutally butchered and bleeding as it lay fallen.
Extremely tense, we lacked the discernment to even notice the shadow of a beast.
The deer’s bloodied eyes, likely having entered from the nearby forest, rolled around. Those eyes were fixed on me.
Yes. That bloodied gaze was aimed directly at me. The deer. The red deer. Looking at me….
“Ugh…!”
Tick-tock. Tick-tock.
The sound of the clock hands echoed in the room. I heaved a rough breath, wiping my face.
It was an all too familiar scene. My room. My cozy little room located in the staff dormitory.
“A dream….”
It had all been a dream. I stared blankly at the blanket and felt the coolness on my forehead with my hand.
Cold sweat had soaked through. I threw aside the damp pillow and roughly shook my head.
“Haah….”
I glanced at the wall clock.
The hands were pointing exactly at three o’clock in the morning.
* * * * *
I left the dormitory. I planned to take a dawn walk, partly to cool my head.
That was also part of the reason the dormitory felt stifling. My room, which usually felt excessively spacious, felt oddly cramped today.
As I stepped out of the dormitory, I felt a strangely giddy mood. It was as if I had become a child committing a mischievous act.
I took a deep breath slowly. The cool and fresh dawn air filled my lungs. Taking in the refreshing air, I stepped forward.
“Should I go to the main chapel?”
Instead of wandering aimlessly, it felt better to stop by the main chapel for a moment. I turned my steps toward the main chapel.
The distance to the staff dormitory wasn’t far, so I was able to reach the main chapel quickly.
The sight of the main chapel encountered at dawn was even more majestic. The stained glass, glowing softly under the moonlight, was beautiful.
I had a memory of visiting late due to Head Priest Giovanni’s finger incident before. As long as something like that didn’t happen, I thought it wouldn’t be bad to visit the main chapel at night, just like now.
Arriving at the door of the main chapel, I soon realized one thing.
“Ah, the key….”
I had left the key behind. What a fool I was.
I didn’t want to go back to the dormitory. But without the key, I could not enter the main chapel.
As I stood idly at the door of the main chapel, I heard a familiar voice.
“Head Priest Antoinneri?”
It was Priest Peter. He approached me slowly, wearing his usual kind smile.
“It seems we meet again like this. This must be another encounter led by the Lord.”
“…Is that so?”
I didn’t feel entirely comfortable. I wanted to enjoy a night stroll alone, not have a conversation with someone.
Whether he noticed my mood or not, Priest Peter had quickly closed the distance between us.
“By the way, what brings you here, Head Priest?”
“I couldn’t sleep, so I thought I would take a stroll for a bit.”
“What a wondrous coincidence. I am the same.”
“Oh, really?”
“If you don’t mind, may I walk with you for a bit?”
It was inconvenient. But I couldn’t bring myself to refuse Priest Peter’s words with that smiling face.
Having been rude before by running out to the bathroom in the middle of a conversation, I decided to go along to his tune this time.
“Alright.”
Priest Peter and I strolled slowly around the main chapel. The walking paths in the academy courtyard were well-maintained, making it perfect for wandering while lost in thought.
We walked in silence like that. Five minutes passed, then ten. As the silence stretched on, I wondered how long it had been.
“Head Priest Antoinneri.”
Priest Peter broke the silence. I turned to face him.
“Yes. Priest Peter.”
“I wonder if Priest Camilla has been disrespectful to you.”
“……”
Priest Peter seemed to already know. Why? Had Priest Camilla said something?
As if reading my thoughts, Priest Peter slowly shook his head.
“Right after you left, Priest Camilla followed you out. Her expression was fierce, which made me uneasy….”
“There was a minor unpleasant incident, but it’s nothing to worry about.”
“Is that so? Then I’m relieved….”
We walked quietly again. Thanks to the bright moonlight illuminating the courtyard, I managed not to stumble in the darkness.
“About Priest Camilla…”
Priest Peter’s words broke through the silence once more. I listened silently.
“She’s a poor child. Though she may lack manners, surely she can improve over time.”
“I see.”
“I apologize on her behalf for the disrespect shown to you. However….”
“Priest Peter.”
I interrupted his words, and Priest Peter looked at me.
“I may have misseen it, but it appeared to me that you and Priest Camilla don’t have a good relationship.”
“…Did it seem that way? Well, that might not be incorrect.”
“Then, I wonder why you defend Priest Camilla.”
Priest Peter was silent for a moment. I patiently waited for his answer.
After a brief silence, Priest Peter finally spoke.
“I don’t dislike Priest Camilla. Head Priest.”
“That doesn’t make sense.”
“I merely resent the original sin she committed.”
Original sin.
I instantly understood what that meant. Because Priest Peter’s bitter gaze was directed at me.
“Are you speaking of the Great War?”
“You participated in the Great War yourself, Head Priest. After seeing your reaction that day, I realized it long ago.”
“……”
“I do not hate those who participated in the Great War. I only hate their sins.”
“To hate the sin but not the sinner….”
“Antica Chapter 17, Verse 3.”
The moment I realized that I had stopped walking was the same moment I noticed my fists trembling. I looked at Priest Peter with eyes filled with condemnation.
“What… what is the point? In the end, isn’t sin committed by people?”
It sounded almost like wordplay to me. A typical statement from someone with a narrow view of humanity.
“I cannot agree with your words. The essence of sin is humanity, Priest Peter. Sin and the human being cannot be viewed as separate entities.”
“Head Priest Antoinneri.”
“We are people living alongside sin. Not to mention, people like myself and Priest Camilla are all the more so. We’re so intertwined that it cannot be separated.”
Priest Peter, who had been a few steps ahead, stopped and turned to look at me.
“By saying that, it sounds like you acknowledge that you are also a sinner, Head Priest Antoinneri.”
“Then, isn’t it true? Don’t you think so too, Priest Peter? You are also a citizen of the Holy Empire!”
In the end, I yelled. It felt like I was going to suffocate from the pressure building inside me. I was drowning in those damned memories.
“Every citizen of the Holy Empire said that! They called me a murderer! They demanded I pay for my sins! I felt that purposeless hatred in every fiber of my being!”
Priest Peter showed no reaction. He simply gazed at me. I cried out even more desperately.
“And yet, now you tell me not to hate humanity? That sin and the human being are separate?! Now of all times!!”
My fist shook with rage. The feeling of my nails digging into my flesh made my palm ache.
“If you’re going to say that, then from the very beginning….”
“……”
“From the very beginning, you should have said so….”
I turned my head away from Priest Peter. My steps turned as well. I intended to return straight to the dormitory.
“Then, are you going to keep floundering in the pit of original sin?”
If only I hadn’t listened to Priest Peter’s continued words.
“The sense of mission to bear the original sin that you have inflicted upon yourself is admirable. However, if that leads to a life where you cannot move forward… I cannot agree with that.”
“…What do you know to say such things?”
“At the very least, I know that Head Priest Antoinneri is not at fault.”
“……!”
I stared at him blankly. My half-turned body soon found itself facing Priest Peter.
“Head Priest Antoinneri. Do you not see the wall blocking your way? How long do you plan to turn back to that distant thorny path simply because you encountered a wall?”
“…I…”
“It is merely a labyrinth with no exit. In that case, you must leap over the wall. You must push forward, no matter what!”
Priest Peter approached slowly. Hot tears streamed from his wrinkled eyes.
I turned my head away from him. I couldn’t bear to look at Priest Peter.
“…Can I be forgiven?”
At the softly muttered words that escaped my lips, Priest Peter’s reply followed.
“The judgment of sin is solely the Lord’s work.”
“……”
“So, as servants of the Lord… we must move forward.”
I mulled over his words in silence.
Slowly, very slowly.
After tearing each one of his words apart, I finally nodded my head heavily.
“…Let’s go back. It’s getting late.”
I slowly made my way back to the dormitory. Priest Peter mumbled something as he followed behind me.
“When sin entered the world, and if only humanity were not evil, then sin would be seen beneath humanity….”
Revelation 2:4.
That phrase bore into my heart like a dagger.
…Why was that?