Rapturous Rhapsody

"Daddy look! We kidnapped our first princess!"

Those were the words that sealed Ling Mei's fate...

"You boys are in so much trouble."

...Not that she heard them.

""But moooom.""

No sooner had she passed through the grey portal than she began to choke on air.

"No buts. Sit down. We'll discuss your punishment after dinner."

More specifically, Ling Mei was choking on the Qi in the air.

""...Yes mom.""

It was so... thick. Thick enough it covered her vision like fog and filled her throat like water.

"And you two! Why did you help them kidnap someone? You should know better than that."

This was a Holy Land the likes of which didn't even exist in stories.

"She's a Princess! Daddy says we need to kidnap every princess we can if we want to get married in the future."

Forget twice the result for half the effort, cultivating here would be a hundred times more effective than anywhere else.

"Daddy said that's how he met you and the other Mommies!"

Just staying here passively would turn any cultivator into a Profound Sky expert in five- No! Three years!

"...Your father and I will be having a long talk later. For now, hand her over. Something's clearly wrong with her."

Only if they could survive though.

"Don't bother. I recognize her. She can sit next to me. Right now, she needs to process the Qi in the air, or she'll explode."

Ling Mei's eyes were closed, and she didn't hear a word. She was completely oblivious to the world around her.

"AH! Don't let her explode Aunty Em!"

The genius of the Twin Heavens Sect was desperately circling her cultivation technique, trying to process Qi faster than it could accumulate.

"She'll be fine once she eats something."

And she was failing.

"Phew. That's good. She shouldn't die just because she's a weak poor princess."

It wasn't even a slow process. More and more Qi poured into her from her meridians, filling her Golden Core to bursting.

"...One of those cultivators? Is that where you ran off to?"

Desperately, Ling Mei cycled and cycled, but her dantian continued to swell to a painful level.

"We were bandits! We got a bunch of presents for everyone."

If this continued, she'd die.

"We have plants, and books, and medicine, and clothes, and please don't be mad."

...There was a solution, but one that would be just as painful than death. Or even worse.

"...We'll talk about it later. For now, go sit down. You two as well."

It would be a betrayal of her father, her sect, her struggles, and would potentially doom her to a fate worse than death.

""Yes mom."" "Yes, Mommy Tsu.""

With a decisive will, Ling Mei directed her Qi to shatter her meridians, making her a cripple for life.

...

It didn't work! Ling Mei found she couldn't control her Qi at all!

"...Why did he allow this?"

It was like trying to direct a leaf to the center of a hurricane, only to be blown away in every direction the wind willed.

"They were safe, got a lot of material, and will also learn that actions can have consequences."

No. It was closer to a river trying to direct the sea. Her minuscule power was simply another drop of water in the current.

"And because he found it funny."

There was an irony there that Ling Mei would never be able to appreciate.

A cultivator was the ultimate selfish being. They seized the power of the world for their own, uncaring of the results. Now, a woman dying of thirst was surrounded by water and it was drowning her.

"That as well. But there was a real goal. He doesn't want them to be trapped on the Island. They need to experience the world beyond the Family."

Ling Mei had a sudden epiphany there, as the pain mounted. A moment of clarity and Insight at the boundary of life and death.

"... I know. But unlike him, I'm not omniscient."

This place, this Qi, this WORLD... It was Alive.

"He knows that and tries to limit himself as well. But it wasn't just for them. He also wants you to be ready when they need to leave for real. And your reaction wouldn't have been genuine if he told you."

Alive and aware. Powerful beyond all reckoning, beyond the greatest cultivator she had ever heard of, but it was not passive.

"I'll talk to him myself later. But... Thanks Em. Getting into his mind is much easier when we have someone to translate for us."

No. This place. This World Island... It was alive, aware, and malicious.

"I am simply doing my duty."

Just as Ling Mei could absorb its Qi, so too could it absorb her.

"Then you should get her to the table soon. I might not know anything about cultivation, but she's going to die in twenty-seven seconds if nothing is done."

Drowning in Qi, the desire of every cultivator, she was helpless to do anything as she was consumed by the Island.

Ling Mei, a genius cultivator, had tried to seize the heavens and been seized in turn.

Then a warm burst of flavor filled her mouth.

The pain faded, her meridians ceased aching, and her Golden Core no longer felt as if it would explode her dantian.

And Ling Mei could breathe!

As the food dissolved on her tongue, Ling Mei let out a sound that was a mix of a sigh and a moan.

The Qi remained just as thick as before, still omnipresent and thick enough to liquefy if given the chance, but it now seemed as if it was trying to devour her whole.

It was as if the heavens themselves had granted Ling Mei a stay of execution.

More than that, with the Qi density still so thick, Ling Mei felt her cultivation advancing at a blinding speed.

The pain she endured, and the Insight she had gained, was enough to propel her to the middle of the Golden Core realm, something she hadn't expected to achieve for another decade. Spending a few months here would get her to the edge of the Profound Sky realm!

Almost without conscious thought, Ling Mei's mouth opened to accept another mouthful of food.

Like the first, a burst of delicious flavor dissolved on her tongue and her overstuffed channels relaxed further.

... Enough so that Ling Mei became conscious of the sounds around her for the first time since her arrival.

Opening her eyes, the Young Miss of the Twin Heavens sect found herself face to face with a laughing young woman no older than her.

"You were right Mikael," she snickered, staring at Ling Mei. "Cultivators are hilarious. Her bodily response to the influx of energy is no less than a druggie getting her fix."

"I'm always right~" A man singsonged.

""""""No, you're not.""""""

The man ignored the combined voices interrupting him to continue speaking.

"Don't be hard be too hard on our little vic- Princess. She just went from the worst trash basuco cut with baking soda to the purest Columbian powder that would even make Snowflame overdose."

"Please do not mention that man while we are eating," a familiar voice spoke, and the kidnapped princess blinked slowly as she stared at the beautiful woman. One of... many. But this one was... familiar, somehow.

Ling Mei, uncomprehending what was happening, obediently opened her mouth and a third bit of food was placed on her tongue.

"What's Columbian powder daddy?"

"It's slang for a drug that causes momentary pleasure at the cost of long-term health."

"Why would someone use that kind of drug? Why not use a better one?"

"Access and escapism. Some people are less fortunate and seek what pleasure they can get, even if it hurts them in the long run. Don't forget that we are very lucky to have Mommy Tsu for any health issues."

"But why don't they make better drugs then?"

"Because not everybody is as smart as you are dear."

"Oh... Should I make better drugs?"

"While that can be a project for the future, you should only do so when you're older and understand the socioeconomic consequences of your actions. For now, continue to learn about the world and, only when you have formed your own opinion should you commit to a plan like that... Unless you just want to create them for fun and don't plan on releasing them. Then go ahead so long as me or one of your moms are with you."

"Okay Daddy."

"Good girl. Now finish your dinner. Mommy Medea worked hard on it and the sooner you all finish the sooner we can get to movie time."

"Can we watch a documentary tonight?"

"It's Ismene's turn to choose."

"I guess Jojo's good too."

It was by the fifth bite that Ling Mei was aware enough to be able to recognize the face of the woman she'd been staring at while the man spoke to the little girl seated beside him at the table.

(Her mind absently noted her as Olivia, the little girl who found Sarig and Jiraiya Senju accosting her and her fellow sect disciples.)

When she could finally put a name to the face and voice, Ling Mei couldn't help but blurt it out.

"Shuang Aima!?"

It was as if a spell was broken, and a torrent of sound and images suddenly became clear to Ling Mei.

She was seated at a long rectangular table positively bursting with beautiful women. No including her, there were sixteen women eating and talking amongst each other. Interspersed between them were a few young children, but none older than the two boys who had kidnapped her.

"Wonderful of you to join us," the sole man, seated at the head of the table, gave her a mischievous smile. "I was worried we'd have to keep you locked in a tower until you got better."

The man's eyes were a burning orange with obviously slit pupils.

A fully grown dragon!

"The Mansion does not possess a tower, Sir Bard. Perhaps we should recreate mine home in Ariamis?" A pale woman with long white hair, slightly scaly skin and spikes for eyebrows over slit green eyes said, and Ling Mei's head snapped to her.

Dragons. A table full of dragons!

She'd been taken to a dragon's den!

"You know, that's not a bad idea," the Dragon King, for that was what he must be, rubbed his chin in thought. "What do you say kids? What to make a clubhouse with Daddy?"

""Yes!""

"You two are still in trouble," a... voluptuous blonde dragon said, glaring at Sarig and Jiraiya who wilted under her look.

"It's alright boys," the Dragon King laughed, getting a glare as well, to which he winked back. "So am I. We'll do it when we're out of the drake-house."

Both boys looked noticeably happier at that and started eating again.

Ling Mei seized the brief lull to increase her chance of survival.

She descended from her chair to kneel toward the table full of creatures more powerful than even the Sect Master.

"A hundred thousand pardons to the Dragon King. This humble one is Ling Mei, a lowly disciple of the Twin Heavens Sect and failed to greet the Esteemed Ones properly. The Long Island sect is more wondrous than imagined and this lowly one was overcome in its splendor. The name of Mai Keer is as thunder in this humble one's ears and this one begs your benevolence in sparing my sect for any offense this humble one might have caused Your Eminence"

Everyone had watched her entreaty in silence, some in surprise, but her plea was met with an unexpected response.

Laughter.

Not from the Dragon King, who watched her with a neutral face, but from the young woman sitting across from Ling Mei. She was the youngest here by far excepting the actual children. Perhaps not even in out of her teen years and into full womanhood.

"Hahahaha," she howled, pounding her fist on the table. "'Mai Keer!' 'Long Island Sect!' Oh god, she's great! Can we keep her? Can we?"

"Hey," Sarig stood up in his chair, pointing a finger at the laughing woman. "Don't bully our Princess! She's ours!"

The blonde woman who sat between him and Jiraiya placed a firm hand on his shoulder and forced him back into his seat.

"Sorry little guy," the laughing woman said, not sounding regretful in the least as she reached over to ruffle his curly hair. He batted her hand away with a pout.

"Val. Don't laugh."

The room fell into complete silence, not even the clinking of silverware continuing after the Dragon King's order.

Ling Mei, who remained bowed, couldn't see his face as he spoke.

"Ling Mei comes from a world where strength is the be all, end all. Where any old man on the road can kill millions. Where cities are regularly destroyed overnight. Where you never know if one wrong word to someone stronger than you can result in your entire family being wiped out. As a woman in such a world, particularly one with a unique body like hers, you can imagine her fate were she to displease someone above her. I hate formality, just as much as you, but to people like her it was a shield. Her only shield in a world where justice is just a concept used by the weak to make themselves feel better about their terrible lives in the hope that the immortal, all powerful monsters shaped like them will one day feel a fraction of pain they inflict on people just trying to live their lives."

"...Sorry."

"It's all right. You're still adjusting to your Element. Just remember that something funny to us might be a source of trauma to others. She genuinely thinks that we will kill, eat, or... defile her because of her Pure Spring Divine Bod, which is a resource many wouldn't pass up on. Maybe we'll do all three. Yet rather than ask to be spared, she's begging for her sect's safety. Why is that, Ling Mei? Why not beg for your life?"

Ling Mei responded without hesitation.

"This humble one's life is yours to do with as you please, Esteemed Dragon King. This humble one merely wished for benevolence to be carried to the Twin Heavens Sect. This humble one's father, teacher, and sect brothers and sisters are blameless for this humble one's failure to respect the illustrious Long Island Sect."

"Family, huh."

There was a beat of silence as Mikael met the eyes of not only Valeria, but also of his kids who were watching this event with distressed looks. Sarig and Jiraiya looked angry, Olivia was frowning, and Ismene was openly crying.

"If I were to kill this woman right here and now-"

""""Daddy don't-""""

"Shh. Let your father speak."

"If I were to kill this woman right here and now, she'd consider it a mercy. If I told her Sect, they'd have to thank me and apologize for the inconvenience she caused me. Do you all know why?"

"...Because they're scared." Olivia answered quietly.

"They, and Ling Mei, are scared." Mikael nodded at his eldest daughter. "Scared of my power. Of what I could do to them and what they cherish. There is no greater fear in a cultivation world than the fear of death. Their entire lives revolve around running from death. In doing so, in fear of an End that will inevitably come, they make Life cheap. Fear is good. It keeps us alive. But it isn't all there is. So do not laugh when someone begs for their lives or those of those they love. Just as I once did. Instead, help them to their feet and teach them that Life is more than a fear of Death, even if that fear is all they've ever known."

A hand, rough and calloused from years of hard struggle, gently pulled Ling Mei from her kneeling position and she found herself looking up at the gentle eyes of the Dragon King.

He was smiling. Gentle at first, but once she was standing on her own feet, his smile turned mischievous again.

He pulled out the chair she had been seated in and gently guided her back to her seat beside Shuang Ai, who had been the one feeding her the lifesaving food.

The Dragon King's smile was gentle at first, but once she was seated, his smile turned mischievous again.

CLAP!

"Since we do not plan on hurting you and will return you home after dinner if you wish, let's get introductions out of the way," the Dragon King, as if the grave mood never existed, simply retook his seat with a smile. "I'm Mikael. Dragon Dad. You know Em and Emma Frost." He gestured to Shuang Ai and Shuang Aima respectively. "We're the only ones to really interact with your world so, like me, they used iterations on our names to fit in better."

There he went using 'your world' again. Even without his strength, it was clear the Dragon King came from a higher realm of sorts by his words and actions.

"Use whichever name works best for you," Shua- Emma Frost said casually, sipping a red drink from a clear glass.

"Beside Emma, is Nico Robin. You met our daughter Olivia." A more traditionally beautiful woman, with long dark hair and clear skin, seated next to Olivia. The resemblance between the pair was clear, only differing in the younger girl's curlier hair and darker eyes.

"Beside her is Melina-"

"And?" It was a woman with one regular eye one made of flame that raised a brow and interrupted the man.

Wasn't she worried about displeasing the Dragon King?

"I was getting there. And the Phoenix."

Ling Mei's heart skipped a beat. A phoenix?!

At least a few beasts could claim to have the bloodline of dragons, extremely diluted as it might be, but a Phoenix was another story entirely!

"They're kind of a two-for-one special and the bird brain doesn't like to be ignored. You'd think it was used to it by now. Anyway, next is Scathach." A woman who'd taken one look at Ling Mei, gave a nod, then went back to speaking to the blonde next to her. "Then Glynda Goodwitch."

"Greetings."

"Artoria Pendragon."

"Your courage and integrity does you credit." Another fair-haired woman, just as... bodacious as Tsunade gave Ling Mei a respectful nod.

Ling Mei wondered why there were more plates in front of this 'Artoria' than any other four people combined but knew better than to ask. Besides, if there were dragons and phoenixes here, perhaps she was a Tao Tie?

"Priscilla is our floofy dragon." The woman with scales blushed and ducked her head shyly at the Dragon King's introduction. "And the woman on her other side is Hippolyta."

Hippolyta gave Ling Mei a long, intense look that she didn't have the context to understand. Evaluating, perhaps? Or commiserating? Either way, the Dragon King moved on the young woman who had laughed earlier.

"You'll have to forgive Valeria for her insensitivity earlier. She's run away from home for a dashing older man, and he's brought changes to her life. It's left her... emotional."

If the way Mikael's mouth was twitching from a barely repressed smile didn't clue Ling Mei into the fact that there was secret in his words, then the chorus of ""Booo!"" and groans from women around the table would have clued her in.

Some even went so far as to throw food at the Dragon King!

Ling Mei was prepared to grovel again at the serious breach of etiquette and the loss of face it brought, but Mikael just laughed and held up... the Boss? between him and the food.

Faster than Ling Mei could follow, all the food in the air disappeared and the fat cat let out a tiny purr of satisfaction before Mikael set it back on his lap.

"Ignore his jokes," Valeria said, but she was laughing as she addressed Ling Mei. "I really am sorry for laughing at you like that. I just became a Paradox Dragon, and my first manifestation was Logic/Emotion. It makes me a sociopath if I don't reign it in."

"That is quite alright Young Miss," Ling Mei clasped her hands and bowed deeply, not understanding half of what was said. "This humble one would never dare to question a lady of your stature."

"...Your world is kinda messed up." Valeria was no longer laughing as she looked over Ling Mei as if she were a particularly interesting alchemical ingredient.

"Perhaps we should not toss rocks in our particular glass house," Hippolyta told the younger woman.

"Our world was pretty normal though," Valeria shook her head and her smile returned. "Tell you what, I'll bring you back to your home after dinner and help you for a bit to make up for you."

"But we just caught her," Jiraiya pouted and crossed his arms. "I don't want to give up our first Princess. I won't."

"Jiraiya." Mikael's tone was warning, but not harsh.

"...sorry."

"What are you sorry for?"

"..."

"Kidnapping Princesses is fine," Mikael lectured. "But keeping them against their will is wrong. If they want to stay, they can but you should never force anyone. Understand?"

"...I understand."

Mikael kept an eye on his eldest child for second, to make sure he really did, then he gave a grin and leaned forward over the table, covering his mouth as if he was trying to tell the boy a secret.

"Psst." He hissed loud enough for everyone to hear. "That just means you need to get your Princesses to want to stay."

That cheered the children up and Ling Mei felt distinctly uncomfortable as all four kids looked at her with shining eyes.

"Anyway, got distracted a bit," Mikael sat back in his seat and continued with his introduction beginning where he left off at the end of the table. "You know Em, but on your other side is Medea. She's the one who made this delicious meal and saved your life."

Ling Mei gave the woman a bow.

"A thousand years of gratitude. This humble one is ashamed that she could not handle the Long Island Sect Qi, for it is as bright as the sun and as deep as the ocean. If there is anything you wish, please speak and this humble one will go to any lengths to accomplish it."

Rather than waive her off or dismiss her offer as useless, for what could Ling Mei do that this dragon couldn't achieve, Medea instead perked right up.

"Perfect. I've been meaning to get a better grasp of Qi. It technically falls under 'Magic' so I can interfere with it, but I need a practitioner's perspective if I want to get holistic grasp of it."

"No dissections on this one. I'll get you others," Mikael said plainly and then, ignoring Ling Mei's look of fear, continued. "You've met Sarig, this is his mother, Tsunade and on her other side is Jiraiya. They're our oldest and little troublemakers. I don't know where they got it from."

"""""""""From you."""""""""

""""From Daddy!""""

It was almost disconcerting how half the women present answered as one, but the children joining in at the same time made it cute, with how Sarig and Jiraiya high-fived behind their mother's back as they laughed at the unified response.

"It's a complete mystery."

"I apologize for any trouble they caused," Tsunade gave Ling Mei a tight smile as she side-eyed her boys and her husband, whose face was completely expressionless... Which lasted until Ismene poked him in the cheek and he squished hers in turn, much to her delight. "I'll be having a... talk with them later."

"Please do not be too harsh. The Young Masters did not harm us and saved this humble one's life from a demonic sect elder."

Ling Mei, despite her situation, did have a pretty good impression of the children. She hadn't been hurt, or even really inconvenienced by them (baring the current kidnapping, which was turning out surprisingly well.)

Without Jiraiya and Sarig there, Ling Mei would probably be dead, or worse, at the hands of the Mo Xi. Even her junior brothers had been left alive to report what had happened to the sect.

(Mu Bang's injuries were, of course, forgotten about. Such was the cruel fate of Mook A in a cultivation world.

But don't give up Mook A!

I believe that with hard work, perseverance, and enough luck, you will get promoted to full Henchman status!

Fight on Mook Bang!)

"They did?" Tsunade asked, seeming to be genuinely surprised as she gave her boys a more evaluating look.

"He was trying to take our Princess!" Sarig 'explained,' throwing a fist in the air as if punching someone. "So, we beat him up. He was very poor though. The Boss ate most of his stuff, but we got some pills and plants for you Mommy. And books. And clothes. And-"

"Awweee," the dark-skinned woman seated on Sarig's other side reached over ruffled his curly hair. He growled, but she just did it again. "You can't stay mad at these little guys when they're helping people, can you Tits?"

"I can. They still snuck out and need to be punished for that." Both boys wilted but Tsunade's voice softened as she continued. "But, since some good came of it, I suppose you can help with the clubhouse."

"Yay."

"Thanks mommy."

"What about me?" Mikael asked.

"You're still in trouble," Tsunade responded with narrowed eyes, but her lip was twitching.

"I guess I am sleeping on the couch tonight," Mikael muttered, seeming to wilt...

No, he really was wilting! Ling Mei noticed that the color had drained not only from his skin, but also from his hair and clothes. A small storm cloud formed over his head. And was that... music? It was. A dirge from an instrument Ling Mei didn't recognize.

She was going to say something, but Ling Mei noticed how none of the women at the table seemed concerned. Some were even rolling their eyes. They all knew that Mikael would never actually 'sleep on the couch' as it were. He'd just 'make it up' to Tsunade in a more... intimate way once the kids were in bed. That didn't stop him from milking the drama for all it was worth.

Unfortunately, some people were just too pure for this world.

"Don't worry Daddy," Ismene smiled, her cheeks dimpling as she stood in her chair to pat him on the shoulder. "You can sleep with me tonight."

Overcome with cuteness, Mikael dissipated the illusion to cuddle his little girl.

"Since he's busy," the dark-skinned woman said to Ling Mei, leaning forward to see past Tsunade's... Tsunades. "I'm Yoruichi. This little blueberry, who's pretending to be dignified, is Ranni." "Cat!" "Then Diana, who is and is not Hippolyta's daughter, and Raven."

Ling Mei opened her mouth to ask about 'Raven' when she realized there was a woman she hadn't even noticed, despite her white cloak.

"I was getting there," Mikael pouted, Ismene still seated on his lap.

"If we waited for you, we'd be here for hours," Diana told him, before looking at Yoruichi in exasperation. "Why did you introduce me like that?"

"Because it was funny."

"Anyway," Mikael returned his attention Ling Mei. "That just leaves this little bean, Ismene, mine and Medea's daughter. Not to be confused with Medea, the Floofiest of Floofs."

"Mrow."

Ling Mei jumped in surprise from the sound that came from right below her feet.

"That means you should feed her," Mikael said, cracking a grin at Ling Mei's surprise. "She'll eat anything, but the best food is what comes off of someone else's plate."

"Mrow."

Hesitantly, and under the encouraging eyes of everyone else, Ling Mei picked up her bowl and, slowly, put it on the ground in front of the cat.

It disappeared, food and bowl, before she could blink.

"Mrow."

"Good job." Jiraiya gave Ling Mei a thumbs up as she sat back up. There was a new bowl, freshly filled, right in front of her.

"It was this humble one's... pleasure..." Ling Mei was still very, very confused. It didn't help that she was still slightly high from the Qi influx. She'd been keeping admirably steady despite that, taking everything in as best as she could, but even she had limits. "Will... Medea not be... sitting to dine with us?" It just seemed so odd that a table of beasts like this would force one to eat on the floor.

That got her some odd looks, which had her shifting uncomfortably.

"Why would she?" Mikael asked, as if Ling Mei was the crazy one here. "She's a cat."

"But..." Ling Mei looked from the Medea next to her to the cat, who had migrated over to sit on Ismene's lap, who was sitting on Mikael's lap.

"Oh." Ismene seemed to realize the source confusion. "Mommy is not a cat. The Boss was just named after her."

"MROW!"

"I think you mean," Mikael calmed down his pet with grin. "That your mom was named after my cat."

"Mrow."

"No treats for two days," Medea told her 'namesake' with a devilish grin.

"MROW!?"

Suddenly the tubby feline was on the witch's lap, flapping her tiny wings pitifully as her eyes started to water.

"...mrow?..."

Medea sighed and started to scratch the cat's jowls, much to her delight.

Yoruichi, seeing an opportunity for more chaos, decided to 'help' Ling Mei.

"A cat sitting down for dinner? That'd be..." In the place of the dark-skinned woman was now a black cat. A black cat that spoke with a deep, male, voice. "...Insane, wouldn't you agree?"

Ling Mei opened her mouth.

Ling Mei closed her mouth.

Open.

Close.

Open.

A spoon of food was shoved into it.

"Ignore them and eat some more," Em Frost told Ling Mei as she set her spoon down. "It will help you process."

Obediently Ling Mei began to eat, trying to ignore the laughter and talking filled the room as the meal progressed.

With every bite, clarity began to return to her and Ling Mei's heart rate was starting to pick up as the euphoric feeling of the Qi influx faded to the background.

What was she doing?!

AHHHHHH!

She was seated at a table with dragons, phoenixes and who knew what other monsters. She'd been taken to a sect so much stronger than the Twin Heavens and was who knew how far from home.

Looking around, they didn't seem like demonic cultivators. In fact, they were utterly foreign, both in appearance and behavior. Their clothes were odd. Their names were odd. Their comportment was even odder.

They talked openly on subjects that went way above Ling Mei's head-

("I prefer Stands to Hamon or Spin," Olivia told her sister and father. "The breadth of creativity in their uses and powers make for engaging plots."

"Spin spin spin spin spin spin," was Ismene's response, spinning in place.

"I'd have thought you'd appreciate the mathematical applications of The Spin," Mikael said, spinning his youngest above his head with one hand.

"It interesting," Olivia conceded but shook her head. "But I like the breadth of creativity in Stands uses and powers make for engaging plots. Each is a puzzle to be solved as much as a weapon to be used.")

-No doubt the secrets of higher realms of cultivation.

More disconcerting was their lack of any sort of propriety!

Yoruichi, turning back into her human form, had been completely nude! And nobody seemed to care! Certainly, she redressed quickly enough, but her clothes barely covered anything.

The Dragon King even kissed a few of his wives!

In front of others!

These were obviously inhuman creatures with a complete lack of understanding of proper decorum.

But the most important question was simple.

What were they going to do with Ling Mei?

They said they'd return her, but they could be lying.

Maybe the Dragon King would take her as a concubine. Or possibly for his sons? They were young certainly, but Ling Mei was only twenty-five years old at the moment. That age difference wouldn't matter in a century or two.

It was possible, especially when one considered that Valeria couldn't be older than seventeen. Who knew what age was acceptable to dragons? Ling Mei doubted she'd be taken as the main wife, even with her Pure Spring Divine Body.

Compared to the women around her, she was more than a few steps behind in qualification, so the best she could hope for would be a valued concubine.

Ling Mei was... uncertain about how she felt about that.

No doubt the resources of the Long Island Sect would help her cultivation in ways that were impossible to imagine. Even the scraps from this table had been enough to raise 'The Boss' to who knew what realm. Thousands of women would kill to be in the position she found herself in.

Yet Ling Mei was reluctant. It wasn't that she was unwilling to take a cultivation partner or that she wouldn't aid her sect if her marriage was what was required.

It was that it had been against her will.

When Ling Mei reached the peak, it wouldn't be because of her own efforts and dedication. A lucky encounter was not to be spurned but nor should one's fate be determined by another.

"How are you feeling," Medea asked as Ling Mei finished her... soup? It was as if it were a congee but with odd grains and more liquid. "Any side effects?"

"This humble one thanks Senior Medea." Despite being surprised by the interruption to her thoughts, Ling Mei did not forget that she was very much in a den of dragons. "This humble one is feeling much better, a testament to Senior Medea's alchemy."

"It's actually my aunt's recipe," Medea explained with a kind smile. "It was practically all she fed us while I studied with her."

"I much prefer your version to the poison Circe used on me," Hippolyta nodded in agreement.

"'Kykeon can be medicine or poison. It's practically ambrosia. Teehee.'" Medea quoted, even giving a slightly silly smile at the end.

"Was there any truth to the theory that it contained psychedelics that caused hallucinations?" Valeria asked, finishing her own meal.

"A few recipes can do so, either with magecraft or simple herbcraft," Medea nodded. "My aunt usually didn't though. Either she was giving her all to feed a guest or was using it as a base to conceal a potion's taste. There was no point in giving the pigs hallucinations."

Suddenly Ling Mei was much more worried about what she just ate.

"Do not worry." As if Em could read Ling Mei's mind, she answered the question before it could be asked. "Her aunt was famous for turning men who invaded her home into pigs but there was nothing wrong with the food. You are safe here and will be returned to the sect just as you are."

Ling Mei, fearing she had shown something she should have, schooled her expression as best she could.

It must not have been enough, because Hippolyta spoke up to reassure her further.

"Do you know why Mikael taught his children it was alright to kidnap Princesses even if he won't allow them to 'keep' one?"

Ling Mei didn't know what she should say that wouldn't risk offense, but not speaking when spoken to directly was also rude, so she hesitantly answered.

"Should this humble one guess, would it not be how the Dragon King has... met one of his partners in the past?"

"Not technically wrong," Medea conceded. "In fact, of his wives, only Robin and Glynda are not princesses, queens, a king, or heirs to a clan of wealth or prestige. And we did meet by him kidnapping us, all be it unintentionally."

Ling Mei wanted to ask how one 'unintentionally' kidnapped a dozen women of royalty but knew that would be a step too far.

"But why princesses specifically?" Hippolyta pressed.

"Because he's a dragon and thinks it's funny," Valeria answered confidently.

"Also not wrong," Em said with a smile, but she answered Hippolyta's actual question. "Because 'Princesses' is an often-overlooked insight into a society. Most societies use the young women of upper classes as bargaining chips, to forge alliances, or as capital to be used to further a ruling class's aims. Their personalities and experiences also speak a lot. Are they drowning in luxury and completely disconnected from the common people? Are they educated and loved or forced to focus on just being a good bride? Societies mirror their rulers and rulers mirror their societies."

Ling Mei felt her heart skip a beat as she was forced to reevaluate Mikael.

Was the Dragon King so devious? Had he planned something like this just to get information? Had she given something away without realizing it? And using his children in his plans?

"Also not wrong," Hippolyta repeated Em's words. "But if Mikael truly wished for information, he'd just know it or look for himself. Nobody would be able to stop him. No. The reason Mikael encouraged the children to kidnap 'princesses' is because he is being kind."

Ling Mei wanted to ask why kidnapping princesses was being kind but, judging by the way the other women around her were nodding in understanding, she feared speaking up. Thankfully, the Amazon explained in a way Ling Mei could understand.

"They are all right, of course. Mikael does it because he finds it funny, gets him information, and because you never know if someone picked up might be a future friend or lover for one of his children. There is also the aspect that it gives his children practical experience in the world and getting them invested in someone outside of the Family. But for the same reason that a princess can give information, they might be in need of help. If they don't, Mikael sends them on their way. No harm done, maybe even benefiting a little."

The way Hippolyta eyed Ling Mei let her know the woman was speaking of her, which Ling Mei couldn't deny. Even if she ignored all the information she gained, just returning to the sect with her advanced cultivation was already an incalculable blessing.

"But if the 'Princess' needs help? If she's in a situation where she doesn't want to return? Then he can use his children's kidnapping of them as an excuse to apologize. Do a favor to someone who needs it. After all, he's just correcting a 'wrong' he committed and helping his kids." Hippolyta gave Ling Mei a tight smile. "If you stick around long enough, you will learn that Mikael will always advance his own agenda and 'coincidentally' help others along the way."

"Many thanks Senior Hippolyta for your wisdom," Ling Mei bowed in gratitude for the explication. She'd believe it once she was safely gone from this den of beasts, but the attempt to alleviate her worries deserved thanks for what it was. "The Dragon King is truly blessed to have a woman such as you."

Right away, Ling Mei was conscious of the fact that she had something wrong by the tightening of the woman's eyes.

Thankfully, she didn't lash out and kill Ling Mei for whatever it was.

"I am afraid you have made a mistake," Hippolyta's smile was a little less sincere. "I am not Mikael's woman. Nor do I wish to be. I am simply traveling with him to grow stronger to better defend my people."

Ling Mei was opening her mouth to apologize when Valeria cut her off.

"Don't worry about her," the teenager waived at the woman beside her. Hippolyta studiously ignored the younger girl. "She's just in denial about what she wants. Unlike me. I'm gonna get that scaly ass for myself."

"You're sixteen," Medea rolled her eyes. "He's not interested."

"I know, but that's part of my plan," Valeria replied with a confident smile. "I'm on step twenty-seven. I'll be thirty by step forty-eight. By step one hundred and five I'll be one of his wives."

"Or," Em drawled. "Like all teenage girls, you will grow out of your crush when it remains unrequited."

"Nope. There's only one Monster for this girl. You'll see."

"Uhuh," Em teased. Looking at Ling Mei, who was very confused, she explained. "Mikael doesn't... engage with anyone except his wives. Think of it as core to his Dao Heart, if you wish. So do not worry about your Primordial Yin or your Pure Spring Divine Body. He's completely uninterested."

Ling Mei let out some of the tension she'd been holding. A cultivator as strong as the Dragon King would not violate their Dao Heart lest they gain a Heart Demon that prevented them from advancing.

Then, looking at the seating of the table, Ling Mei had another realization.

"You're wrong." Em said sharply as soon as the thought appeared in Ling Mei's mind. "Yes, I am not one of his wives either, but there are no arranged seats. It is first come first served. The only reason we are at the tail end is because I will be the one to bring you back, Val wanted to talk with you, Medea needed to make sure you didn't explode, and Hippolyta was talking to her."

Ling Mei realized she had accidently hit a sore spot for all three women, Em especially. One that left their corner in an awkward silence.

Thankfully, Medea was able to alleviate the tension by asking Ling Mei about her cultivation. Specifically, about her experience with Qi, the nature of each realm and what distinguished them.

It was such common knowledge that Ling Mei had no trouble speaking about it without fear of leaking the sect's secrets.

That, thankfully, carried the conversation until Artoria, despite eating the fastest, was done with her food.

"I think it's time we say goodbye to our Princess," Mikael finally said, waving his hand and cleaning the table.

""Awwww."" Sarig and Jiraiya pouted, and the younger brother continued. "You didn't give us time to convince her to stay."

"You'll just have to try harder next time," Mikael teased and the boys perked up, obviously getting the idea he was hinting at.

"Don't worry Princess," Jiraiya 'reassured' Ling Mei. "You might be poor and weak, but we'll kidnap you next time as well. And we'll do it even better!"

Unsure whether to laugh or cry, Ling Mei just thanked the 'Young Masters' for their 'consideration.'

"Bye bye."

"Bye Princess."

"See you next time!"

Mikael shuffled the children over to a nearby room as they waved goodbye. The women of the house began to split up, some in groups to return to their own activities, not forgetting to wish farewell to Ling Mei either.

As Em guided Ling Mei towards the entrance of the mansion, the Young Miss couldn't help but notice something odd.

The Dragon King was seated with his children facing a screen of some sort... Yet another 'Mikael' was being pulled by Tsunade to another room.

And, as Ling Mei exited the building, she saw another 'Mikael' brushing a horned horse.

"The best way to think of him," Em said, once more seeming to predict her thoughts. "Is to imagine the highest cultivation realm possible. Then imagine ten realms higher than that. Only then will you have the barest hint of Mikael."

Ling Mei shuddered in fear at the idea. For some reason, she did not believe Shuang Ai was exaggerating.

"May this humble one ask a question?"

"Go ahead."

"Why are you letting this one go? Are you not afraid this humble one will speak of what she has learned?"

Em gave Ling Mei a flat look.

"Will you?"

"This humble one would not dare."

"Even if you did, it wouldn't matter." Em shrugged, conjuring one of those grey portals. "Your entire continent could throw themselves at me and wouldn't scuff one of my scales."

"If..." Ling Mei hesitated before deciding to take the risk. "If you are so strong, why haven't you simply taken what you wished for from the Twin Heavens sect? We could not stop you."

Em, halfway through the portal, looked back at Ling Mei.

"When you've reached the peak. When there's nowhere left to climb, what will you do then?"

Ling Mei didn't have an answer, and Em didn't seem to expect one.

To a cultivator, there was only the climb.

Nobody ever thought of the summit itself or what followed after.

"If you ever reach that point, you'll realize that there are some things worth more than power."

The way Em's eyes were locked on the mansion behind them, a look of deep yearning in those icy pools.

Then the moment was gone, and Ling Mei was through the grey portal and standing outside the gates of the Twin Heavens sect.

"You will win the upcoming 'tournament' your sect set up." Em commanded. "We have no wish to deal with whatever simpleton your master wants to use to seduce us. Once you do, we'll help you in exchange for knowledge of cultivation and other matters. It will be mutually beneficial and will not betray your sect."

Ling Mei gave an awkward smile at the Sect Master being caught but bowed in respect. She was feeling much more comfortable now that she was back on familiar territory and knew these crazy dragons had held up their promise.

"This one will do her best. If this one may-"

"Why you?" Shuang Ai cut her off and Ling Mei was really starting to wonder if the woman couldn't really read her thoughts. "It's not because the boys kidnaped you. It's because Ismene let them."

Ling Mei blinked in surprise, not understanding.

"If you are around us long enough, you'll get it," Em shook her head. "Just remember this. You can argue, disagree, or even fight anyone and it won't be held against you. Me. Mikael. Medea. It doesn't matter. Except for Ismene. If she doesn't like you, you won't even realize you've died."

Ling Mei gulped, not realizing that the cute little girl was such a terrifying being.

Em nodded, glad the girl was taking her warning seriously. Knowing her hus- Knowing Mikeal, he wouldn't have set her up to be his son's 'first princess' if she wouldn't stick around for at least a little while.

Ling Mei returned to her sect, safe and sound, even a bit stronger than before and with the greatest opportunity one could dream of laid out before her. So much happened in such a short time that, even as she warned her father and master of the threat of the demonic sects, and the importance of keeping the Long Island sect pleased, that Ling Mei couldn't help but fear she was forgetting something important.

(Xiao Tian, Mu Bang, and sect brothers B and C would go on to flee the province, afraid of the retaliation of the Twin Heavens Sect for failing their mission and losing the Young Miss.

'Hunted' as they were, they'd form bonds of brotherhood and friendship stronger than steel and go on hundreds of adventures. By the time they learned Ling Mei had been safe, and they weren't being hunted, it would be centuries later.

Mu Bang would spit out a mouthful of blood and pass out.)

It probably wasn't important anyway.

When Jiraiya and Sarig snuck out again, they'd show up in the middle of a battle between the sects. After beating up the demonic cultivators and 'kidnaping' Ling Mei once more, they'd try to convince her to stay with their 'awesome clubhouse' (read: magical fortress).

Even in the years to come, and dozens of kidnappings later, Ling Mei would never forget Em's warning and slowly learn how true it was.

All of Mikael's children were little monsters in the making.

But even with siblings with Elements like Peace, War, Knowledge, or even future children, Ismene would still be the most dangerous. It was lucky she was so kind and loving.

Then again, she probably wouldn't have gained her Element if she wasn't that way.

If the Dragon of Family disapproves of you... You probably never existed in the first place.

"And that is how your older brothers kidnapped their first Princess," Mikael closed the book quietly, smiling at the sight of his newest group of children trying in vain to stay awake.

So cute!

Conjuring two more bodies, Mikael picked up the babies and was about to bring them to bed, despite their cries for more stories.

On the way, he ran into Ling Mei who bowed.

He never really managed to get her to cut out with the formalities.

With a hint of Qi, Ling Mei transmitted her voice to his ear to not wake up the infants.

"Dragon King, can you please tell me where Jiraiya is?"

"He and Sarig are out being bandits again."

Ling Mei pressed her lips together, bowed once more, and made to leave to find the teenager.

He was supposed to kidnap her last week!

Then Ling Mei paused, looking at Mikael in hesitation.

"Yes?"

"I have a question, if I may?"

"Sure."

"Why the Twin Heavens sect? There are better cultivation manuals out there. Stronger ones. So why did you choose us?"

"The Twin Mind Spirit technique was originally called the Dual Body Mind Spirit technique," Mikael explained quietly, a teasing smile on his face. "Your founder discovered it in a ruin and changed it. We simply wanted to get the newer version to recreate the original."

"Would it be possible for me to learn the original?" Ling Mei asked, always eager to expand her knowledge of cultivation.

"Sure," Mikael grinned, conjuring a book and putting it in the young woman's hands.

She quickly opened it and flipped through it, her face turning redder with every word read.

Mikael laughed loudly at seeing her face, carefully ensuring the sound didn't reach the babies.

"The Dual Body Mind Spirit technique is the only dual cultivation method that has no practical requirements for the practitioners while still allowing one party to transfer Qi from one party to the other. Or at least it's the only one that requires such a fun method. My wives don't want to cultivate," Mikael shrugged with a teasing smile. "I, on the other hand, am dedicated to the Dao and retain a firm heart. They are just helping me with my cultivation, which also makes them stronger."

Ling Mei stood there, a lewd book in hand, as Mikael walked away laughing.

The Heavens were sometimes cruel, sometimes kind, sometimes fair, and sometimes unjust.

And sometimes...

Just sometimes...

The Heavens will completely upend your life because it wants to have kinky sex with its wives.