Sunshine Shower

“Hey, Oppa! What brings you here?”As he entered, Seo Jieun waved at him with a cheerful smile.“I met up with some seniors and heard you were nearby.”“Seoyoon hyung went to the restroom. He said he’s just washing his hands.”Although they said they were about to leave, it seemed like they really were getting ready to go, as they were gathering their coats and bags.“You’re heading out early?”“Don’t even get me started. The mood got totally ruined because of that jerk, Han Cheolmin.”Kang Sooha sighed deeply, ruffling his hair before putting on his cap.“What did Cheolmin sunbae do?”Why is that jerk’s name coming up here? Woo Yeonjae deliberately used an honorific as he asked.“I don’t know. He got super drunk and suddenly showed up here, acting all crazy. Seoyoon hyung and he stepped out together, but only hyung came back. He said nothing happened, but the mood was just off, so we decided to call it a night.”It seemed like Cheolmin had caused trouble for Moon Seoyoon to vent his frustrations after being humiliated. No one would have invited him, so he must have stumbled upon them by chance since all the bars were in the same area.“Sunbae doesn’t really know how to read the room, huh?”“Yeah, that’s why he always crashes our gatherings.”The sarcastic comment, barely a mutter, vanished into Seo Jieun’s cheerful tone.“Why are you here?”Just then, a familiar voice called out. Woo Yeonjae lazily turned his head to see Moon Seoyoon standing there with wide eyes. His gaze lingered on Seoyoon, taking in his appearance from head to toe.“Did anything happen?”“What would have happened?”Yeonjae had half-expected him to mention Han Cheolmin, but since he was asking, it seemed like he had no intention of bringing it up.“Nothing, never mind. You said you were leaving now, right?”“Yeah.”“Then we can leave together.”Yeonjae casually changed the subject and nodded toward the door. Although Moon Seoyoon looked puzzled by his sudden appearance, he grabbed his bag and wallet.“I already paid on my way in.”“What? Why’d you pay?”“It’s a gesture of thanks for the juniors who let me join their group project.”Seoyoon joked lightly, and Sooha quickly chimed in.“Whoa, hyung, thank you for the meal. But honestly, we got a lot of help from you, too.”“That’s right. Thanks again.”“Me too!”Yeonjae raised an eyebrow at Seoyoon, as if to ask if he was satisfied now. Seoyoon, unable to hide his frustration, wrinkled his nose but eventually let out a small laugh, resigned.As they stepped out of the building, the cool night breeze brushed past their fingers, easing the lingering heat.“We have somewhere to go, so we’ll head this way.”“Take care.”“Goodbye, Oppa. You too, Seoyoon Oppa.”“Goodbye.”Once the lively group from the student council was gone, silence quickly settled in. The voices of passersby became a distant background noise, blending into the night. Without a word, Woo Yeonjae began walking, ensuring Seoyoon wouldn’t make a quick getaway to the dorm.Sure enough, Seoyoon, who had missed the chance to escape while waving goodbye to the juniors, followed behind him. Only when they reached the parking lot across the street did Yeonjae stop.“Get in.”Knowing Seoyoon was about to say he’d walk, Yeonjae opened the driver’s side door and got in. After a brief hesitation, Seoyoon climbed into the passenger seat.“I could’ve walked.”“I heard Han Cheolmin caused some trouble.”“Did the others tell you?”Yeonjae merely shrugged.“Ugh, I told them not to say anything…”“What’s there you can’t tell me?”“It wasn’t anything good, so what’s the point? By the way, did you… never mind.”“What?”“It’s nothing.”It was obvious he had something to ask but then decided against it. Yeonjae quickly pieced together what had been left unsaid. Han Cheolmin had probably dropped his name while acting up. Despite all the warnings, the idiot still didn’t get it. Maybe he needed a different kind of lesson.“Anything else?”“Anything else?”“That jerk has a habit of getting handsy. Someone must’ve thought about taking a punch.”“He did raise his hand, but I didn’t get hit. I guess even he realized it was too much, so he just left.”Seoyoon took the bait easily.But he still didn’t mention the other guy.As the image of his childhood friend compliantly nestled in another man’s arms resurfaced, Woo Yeonjae lightly scraped his tongue against the roof of his mouth, his gaze sweeping over Seoyoon.“Why?”Without hesitation, he reached out, grasping Seoyoon’s chin to examine his face closely, but there were no signs of swelling or any other abnormalities.“I told you, I didn’t get hit.”Still, his cheeks were pale. When Seoyoon lowered his eyelids, Yeonjae noticed his tightly clenched fists. Was it because of his memory of getting hit by Professor Moon? That suspicion briefly crossed his mind.Woo Yeonjae pushed his tongue against his teeth and fastened his seatbelt. The engine started immediately.“Hey. I told you I could walk.”“Where do you think you’re going looking like that?”The car smoothly exited the parking lot.“I told you, nothing happened.”“You could at least hide that shaking better.”Moon Seoyoon fell silent.“Are you going to wake up crying in your sleep again?”Sometimes, Seoyoon would cry in his sleep. Whether it was because of Professor Moon or his late mother, Yeonjae couldn’t be sure. After graduating high school, they’d only rarely slept in the same bed, so he wasn’t sure if it still happened, but judging by Seoyoon’s expression, he seemed to have hit the mark.“Stay over.”Yeonjae shifted his gaze away from Seoyoon’s lips, which had parted but then closed, and turned the steering wheel. The seatbelt tightened around him.Under the bright lights, Seoyoon’s face was even more clearly visible, and his eyebrows were furrowed deeply.“What happened to your lips?”Since they got into the car, something had been bothering Yeonjae, and now he saw that Seoyoon’s lips were swollen. Without hesitation, Yeonjae reached out and pressed down on the swollen lip. As he leaned closer to examine it, Seoyoon flinched and roughly pushed his hand away.“I-I’m going to shower.”It was a clear attempt to escape.Yeonjae stared at his hand, which had been abruptly pushed away, then shifted his gaze toward the bathroom. His narrow eyes thinned even further.The bathroom, just recently used by someone, was still thick with steam. Since Yeonjae never let anyone else into his room, it was the first time someone else had used the bathroom.Though Yeonjae was well aware of his fastidiousness, he couldn’t help his distaste for the dampness lingering in the bathroom. It might have stemmed from his habit of using the private bathroom attached to his room since he was young. Whether it was a habit or a touch of OCD, the fact that it was difficult to change was the same.During school trips or when he had to share a bathroom with others, Yeonjae would always be the first to wash up. Even though the place was meant for cleaning, the thought of stepping on water that had flowed down someone else’s body was unsettling.The only exception was Moon Seoyoon. He would walk across the wet floor without a care as he took off his clothes.“This is the first time he’s avoided me so openly…”The sensation of Seoyoon pushing his hand away still clung to his palm.Yeonjae replayed that moment in his mind. The image of Seoyoon’s face, pale with shock, lingered before his eyes.Moving mechanically, he turned on the shower, and lukewarm water poured down. It was the perfect temperature that Seoyoon liked. Yeonjae turned up the heat slightly and bit his tongue. After gnawing on it so much, he could taste a faint trace of blood.Why were his lips like that?As he recalled the moment Seoyoon had shoved him away, the swollen lips came to mind again. Since it wasn’t Han Cheolmin who hit him, there was only one possible explanation.For lips to get swollen like that, it had to be from kissing. Considering he’d been with the juniors most of the time, the opportunity to do so would have been very brief.“…”Yeonjae vividly remembered his friend nestled submissively in another man’s arms. Perhaps because of the hot water pouring down on him, his body started to heat up all over.‘When I was discharged, I started working at a café. I often worked the closing shift… He’s an office worker who drops by around closing time.’Yeonjae had long since realized that Seoyoon’s crush wasn’t on some office worker.‘I have someone I like, but he’s a man.’A man he’d been with for a year and a half.‘But I prefer older guys.’And an older man, at that.When Yeonjae had said he wouldn’t bring up their argument in the car, he meant he would drop the subject, not that he would accept Seoyoon’s feelings for another man. But why? Those ridiculous rumors that briefly circulated in middle school were irrelevant. It was the confession that he liked someone of the same sex that Yeonjae couldn’t understand.Love is just hormones, after all. Humans merely give it a romantic name.Society requires labor, and labor requires offspring. To facilitate the production of offspring, humans created a noble-sounding concept called love. It sounds more civilized to think that sex originates from a beautiful emotion rather than mere lust for reproduction.Suddenly, a voice from a fevered memory echoed in his ears.‘You hardly come back on weekends yourself, so what are you talking about?’Why did he care if his roommate didn’t return on weekends? What were they doing together?A series of memories unexpectedly invaded his thoughts.After fleeing to the military, Moon Seoyoon had taken only a handful of leaves. He’d gone home even less often. Since Professor Moon wouldn’t lie, that much was certain.“What were you doing instead of going home?”His quiet voice resonated in the humid air. The water continued to pour from the showerhead, soaking him from head to toe. The sound of water falling above him made his head spin.Of course, Moon Seoyoon has a libido, too. Yeonjae suddenly became aware of this fact.“Ha.”The corners of his mouth twisted, wet from water.He said he liked men, but perhaps it was merely a misconception driven by sexual desire. He had initially doubted whether it was even possible to feel sexual attraction toward the same sex, but perhaps because his mind was in a more subdued state, he vaguely considered that it could be possible.“……”There were people like him, so it wasn’t impossible for someone to have a unique sexual preference. Since the word “bisexual” existed, there must be people who felt sexual desire regardless of gender.Only then did Woo Yeonjae find a clear answer. Moon Seoyoon confessed to liking men, but the reality was that it was likely just sexual desire.“Hah……”A sharp breath, mixed with a sigh and a dry laugh, escaped between his lips that parted late.“Just sexual desire.”The cigarette he learned from that man. The few times he had taken leave. The hand that had unhesitatingly groped his buttocks. Moon Seoyoon naturally embracing him in his arms.‘Since he calls it unrequited love, they must not be dating… So, a sex friend?’It was one of the types of people he despised most, but perhaps they were the most honest. They were the ones who openly admitted to meeting because they were driven by sexual desire without the pretense of love.Woo Yeonjae bit his tongue again. It seemed his childhood friend was mistaking sexual desire for a profound emotion.He knew that just because he was skeptical of the emotion called love, it didn’t mean everyone thought the same way. Still, he thought that if Moon Seoyoon ever found someone he “liked” by his standards, it would be a decent person. Someone who fit him like a picture, someone he could care for like a real niece or nephew if they had a child together.“But the one you chose is…”A man? The social stigma was too harsh to be driven by mere sexual desire.Woo Yeonjae didn’t want Moon Seoyoon to become the subject of gossip over something unnecessary. It might seem fine now, but if he kept meeting men like this, there was a strong chance he’d attract strange people.Woo Yeonjae stood under the hot water for a long time. When droplets of water dripped between his lips, his sharp teeth bit into the flesh again.“……”Since he had found the cause of Moon Seoyoon’s emotional confusion, finding a solution was quite easy.Woo Yeonjae finally left the bathroom after drying his hair. Moon Seoyoon was sitting on the living room sofa, hugging his knees. When their eyes met, his swollen lips were pressed against his teeth. Those lips had been bothering him ever since he entered this space.“Seoyoon.”Naturally approaching him, he called out to his closest friend. When Moon Seoyoon’s lips parted, the lips that had been pressed against his teeth returned to their place. It seemed like there was a hint of blood inside. It looked like our Seoyoon had some fun with that guy.“Do you want to do it with me?”“Do what?”Moon Seoyoon’s expression turned puzzled at the sentence without a direct object. Woo Yeonjae looked at his seemingly innocent childhood friend of 17 years and asked.“Sex.”His tone was calm, as if it was no big deal.