Sweet Shot

#44

The call ended with a final reminder to take care. In the end, the call concluded with concern for him. They talked on the phone about twice a week. Ha-min knew that his mother called regularly to check on his condition through his voice. His mother didn’t show it, but Ha-min could tell, and Ha-min didn’t show that he knew this fact.

Since that day, our family rarely spoke about that incident out loud. Sometimes, when his mother thought about that time, her eyes looked as if she might collapse. Although she was a strong person, when thinking about that incident, his mother had the most heartbreaking expression of anyone. He hated seeing that the most. So he too kept his mouth shut. Seeing a loved one sad because of him was more painful than he expected, and it caused even more guilt.

Perhaps that’s why his mother’s voice had been so good lately. She called every day with a voice that seemed excited. His peaceful daily life must have been very welcome to his mother.

Ha-min quietly put his phone in his pocket and continued what he was doing. It was to suppress the emotions that suddenly rose in his throat. The miserable events had already passed and disappeared, but sometimes, suddenly, they would well up. The doctor called this trauma and urged him to overcome it.

Ding-a-ling.

It was when he was trying hard to suppress his emotions and move his body vigorously. As he was about to bring a mop to clean the floor, the convenience store door opened.

“Hyung is here.”

It was Tae-in who came in through the door. Tae-in, who entered with a swagger, waved the chicken he had brought with a broad smile.

“No customers, right?”

Ha-min smiled cheerfully at Tae-in’s words as he looked around the empty store.

**

Tae-in and Ha-min sat at a table outside the convenience store meant for customers. Tae-in opened a can of beer along with the chicken he brought, while Ha-min opened a can of soft drink as he was still working. Ha-min diligently called the owner to get permission. He asked if it was okay to sit and talk with a friend for a while since there were no customers. The owner let out an incredulous laugh. He said he had already told him to do so earlier and hung up, telling him to be flexible about such things. Watching the conscientious Ha-min, Tae-in clicked his tongue. He nagged about how Ha-min could live without any cunning.

“Hey, working a part-time job on your birthday, what’s that about?”

Tae-in said disapprovingly as he tore off a chicken leg. Ha-min smiled faintly and nibbled on a small piece of chicken breast. It tasted deliciously savory. Knowing he shouldn’t eat too much, he deliberately ate from the breast part.

“It’s not like birthdays are a big deal…”

Ha-min muttered softly and took a swig of his drink. The wind blew cool in the night. But it wasn’t cold, making it perfect weather for chicken and beer outside.

“Of course it’s a big deal. You’re surprisingly cold sometimes. Do you know how many years it’s been since we’ve celebrated a birthday together? You know, right?”

“I don’t really care about such things…”

“Well, I care a lot, okay? Just try skipping my birthday.”

Ha-min chuckled at the words that sounded like a genuine threat. It was silly how childish he was acting. He used to have a sharper personality, but it seemed time had mellowed Tae-in considerably.

“Hey, I picked this up on the way.”

Tae-in rummaged through his coat pocket and tossed a small shopping bag with a case inside. Ha-min caught the carelessly thrown gift with a surprised face. When Ha-min looked at him with a puzzled expression, Tae-in gestured for him to open it quickly.

“Ah.”

When he unwrapped it, there was a small wallet inside the case. It was a simple brown leather wallet. It was very pretty but looked expensive. Although he was grateful, Ha-min furrowed his brow, feeling burdened, and Tae-in preempted him.

“For your information, I didn’t buy that with hyung’s money. I didn’t use hyung’s card either.”

“I didn’t say anything…”

“I bought it with my own pocket money that I saved separately.”

Tae-in said very proudly. Ha-min laughed softly at his boastful appearance.

“It seems expensive…”

“Hey, if you don’t carry around at least this much, you’ll be cursed at wherever you go.”

“Still…”

“Buy me something more expensive on my birthday.”

“…”

“And it’s not expensive, stupid. The really expensive one is that watch hyung bought to give you.”

When Tae-in made a remark about Ha-min’s hesitation to receive gifts, Ha-min’s eyes suddenly dropped.

“More importantly, show off what you received for now. I sneaked a peek at it then, and it was killer. Hyung really knows his stuff when it comes to those things.”

“I didn’t accept it…”

Ha-min muttered in a shrinking voice to Tae-in’s urging to show off. Tae-in’s eyes widened at those words.

“What? That?”

“How could I accept something like that…”

“Hey, you idiot. You stupid bastard. Aish, why couldn’t you accept it! Our hyung has tons of money!”

“Still…”

“I’m telling you, that much is just pocket change to Lee Tae-rim. Oh my god, you really are an idiot.”

Tae-in beat his chest with a look of exasperation. Ha-min smiled awkwardly and fiddled with his drink can.

“You know, our grandfather loved hyung so much that he left almost all of his inheritance to hyung when he died? So he has several buildings in Seoul under his name, and that huge mansion of grandfather’s in America is his too. Is that all? Father’s company in America will soon be hyung’s too, and you can’t accept that one thing from someone like that? You frustrating idiot.”

Tae-in gulped down his beer roughly as if he was the one being wronged. Regardless of what wealth he possessed, Ha-min felt he wasn’t worthy of receiving such a gift. Above all, he had decided to draw the line on such favors now. Not knowing the inside story, Ha-min just smiled at Tae-in. There were things he couldn’t explain in detail. Come to think of it, there were too many things he was hiding from Tae-in. The past events, his feelings for hyung, and now his relationship with hyung. What would he think if he knew everything?

“I just said I wouldn’t accept it.”

Ha-min answered calmly despite Tae-in’s fuss. His eyes were composed without any disturbance. Tae-in paused his excitement for a moment and cleared his throat.

“Well, given your personality, that could happen… but forget it, just accept my gift instead, okay?”

“…”

“Hey, my gift isn’t even a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of Lee Tae-rim’s in price. It’s just something from a trendy brand that’s easy to buy these days.”

Ha-min chuckled softly at Tae-in’s rapid-fire words. He looked like he would be greatly offended if Ha-min really didn’t accept it. Ha-min quietly put the gift case into the shopping bag and tucked it against his chest.

“Thank you.”

He knows that refusing too much can also be inconsiderate. As Tae-in said, he accepted it with the thought of giving him something even better on his birthday.

“That’s more like it.”

Tae-in answered nonchalantly with a satisfied face. Ha-min handed Tae-in the tastiest chicken leg.

“I’ll give you my leg because I’m grateful.”

“Alright.”

Tae-in smirked and gladly popped the chicken leg into his mouth. Ha-min also smiled back and jokingly spoke up.

“But is it really not expensive?”

“Yeah.”

“…Should I look it up?”

“That’s bad manners, you know.”

Tae-in frowned and pointed at him. Ha-min let out a deflated laugh jokingly and finished his drink. The cool air, the quiet street, the ordinary conversation with his childhood friend, everything was peaceful. Ha-min smiled carefreely but then made a bitter face.

He felt as if this ordinary daily life wasn’t his own and was creaking. There were too many things he was hiding from Tae-in. He couldn’t gauge when he would be able to tell him everything.

**

He finished changing clothes after handing over to the next shift. Thanks to the person for the next shift coming earlier than usual, he was able to finish even earlier. It seemed the owner had probably told them in advance. It appeared to be a small consideration to let him leave work earlier on his birthday. Ha-min bowed politely to the person taking over the next shift and packed his bag.

In the end, there was no contact from him. The date had already turned to the day after his birthday. He wasn’t disappointed. He just found himself silly for having expected it somehow. Just… it seemed he had wanted to hear a simple “happy birthday.” Just a simple word without any fancy gifts. Just like usual, with a smile.

Ha-min left the convenience store alone, letting out a foolish laugh, dangling the shopping bag Tae-in had given him. A cool breeze blew, ruffling his hair. As he brushed back his disheveled hair and casually turned his gaze, he saw a familiar side profile. As he slowly raised his eyes from the feet up, a smile spread across Ha-min’s face.

“Hyung?”

He was smoking a cigarette near the convenience store. Ha-min squinted his eyes and looked closely, as if he might have seen wrong. No matter how he looked, it was definitely him.

“Are you done?”

He asked quietly, discarding the cigarette butt he had been smoking without hesitation. Ha-min nodded with a dazed face at the casual question.

“Good work.”

As Ha-min quietly nodded, his words, spoken with a faint smile, were just ordinary. The atmosphere was strangely different from usual. It was the same gentle voice and appropriately smiling face, but somehow it felt cynical.

“Oh, okay.”

Ha-min felt happy but also intimidated. As Ha-min quietly responded, he opened the passenger door as if he had been waiting.

“Get in.”

Ha-min opened his eyes wide at the short command.

“Huh? Why…?”

When Ha-min asked in confusion at the sudden instruction to get in the car, he let out a laugh as if to say ‘why are you asking?’

“Why, you ask.”

And he added in an terribly calm tone.

“We’re going to fuck.”