The Smartphone Saga Book 2 - A Place to Belong: Blueprints and Blunder

As mysterious as the oceans are, the earth beneath your feet is far more unknowable. Twenty-five miles of rock before you hit what, by all scientific theory, must be liquid stone. Deeper than any sea, darker than any surface shadow. Impenetrable in nature.

Still, in more sane realities there is little to threaten man beneath the ground. Mankind itself does not fear great tunneling beasts or ten-thousand ravenous scuttling things. Indeed, what we find most horrible is the anxious threat of collapse and our human incompatibility with tight spaces.

If you were a cat, you'd be fine. No problems with tight spaces, and no abstract theory to say that the ceiling might collapse at any time. No anxiety beyond the odd cucumber.

Speaking of cats and things that shake in the deep, Jasson Boar had a problem. You see, the furry little buggers were cute despite their massive size. Kittens beyond the event horizon of adorable. All that translated into more kitten to cuddle. Two entire armfuls of kitten. One Kitty to fill them all.

But there were two kitties and not enough hands to love them all. One would mew and press against Jasson's back whenever he turned his attention to the other. 

"Clara!" Jasson hoped he was being just quiet enough to not spook the kittens. "Clara! Can you hear me?! Bring everybody around here!"

Jasson waited, rubbing the purring orange kitten with all of his limbs. Looks like she couldn't hear them. Right.

Jasson pried himself away one limb at a time, trying to make his way back to the others, only to find the black and white cat waiting. It captured his freed limbs in rubbing affection and Jasson about cried from joy. He worked his way around the black and white kitten and pried his limbs away again, only to find the Orange kitten waiting for pats.

"Okay," Jasson said, "I'll make progress one cat at a time."

He crossed the Not-ruins one fluffy stepping stone at a time. A journey of giddy bliss, careful not to spook the precious beans. A kitten he could hug and not hurt!

Eventually, Jasson arrived outside the entrance. Jasson managed to squeeze his head past the curtain and saw Clara and the others laughing.

"Hey," Jasson said, "I have good news and bad news."

"What's the bad news?" Petra said, shifting from chill to brusque in a moment.

"What's the good news?" Clara said.

"Why are you covered in fur?" Harriet said.

So many questions, Jasson thought as a kitten butted up against his back, one precious answer.

"I shall answer you all," Jasson stood aside, letting a kitten butt past, "We have kittens now!"

The two kittens tumbled into the room and across the beds, tossing around and rubbing up against everyone. Then their beady eyes landed on the table and the half-eaten feast on top of it.

"Jasson!" Petra screamed as the others laughed, "What have you done?!"

Clara cut off a kitten and scooped half the dishes away, but the orange cat got a hold of the roast while the black and white one gobbled up rolls that had fallen to the floor. 

"Don't blame me!" Jasson laughed as he tried to pull away some food, "The cat distribution system has chosen us."

Clara pulled most of the roast away from the orange kitten.

"These aren't cats!" Petra said, "They're monst-oof!"

The orange kitten gave up on the food and leaped for Petra, purring as it knocked her to the ground.

"Get off you foul beast!" Petra said, "Get-get-awwww. It's purring. Clara, it likes me!"

"Jasson!" Clara called from beneath the black and white one, "Run to town and get some string and something fuzzy to play with them!"

"Everything's closed at this hour," Jasson said, "Besides, I think that rope would do better."

"True!" Clara said, "Petra, I think there's rope in your-"

Petra had fallen into complete baby talk, babbling to the orange kitten as she petted it. Harriett had launched into a full-body hug on top of the orange cat, rubbing her face fiercely.

"Oh, never mind," Clara laughed, petting the black and white cat, "Who's a good kitty? You're so precious!."

The four of them lay exhausted as the two kittens snuggled by the wide kitchen fireplace. Night weighed heavily on their eyes, just as pats weighed heavily on their arms. Exhaustion was coming to one and all, especially Clara who'd quit last.

"All right," Jasson reclined on his bed, "we need names for them."

"Oh?" Petra said, "So it's up to you to decide that we're keeping them?"

"Come on," Jasson motioned the the two giant lumps, "It's obvious, isn't it? That orange cat that took Clout was their mother. Or rather, hard to tell. They followed us all the way home."

"Couldn't have been that hard," Petra sighed, "But it's not like we can just take them back."

"Exactly," Jasson said, "so they have come under our dominion. Our care."

"You just want to keep them because they're cool," Petra said, huffing, "But I suppose you're right. Clara?"

Clara was snoring to their side and Jasson said "I think that she'd be fine with it. Harriett?"

Harriett didn't respond for a few moments before saying, "That mother cat killed a great mage with a Greater crystal. Yeah, it was an ambush. But he was still screaming as the cat walked away. These are powerful creatures, or they will be when they grow up. Each one could be nearly considered a Dragon-level threat, but together…this is dangerous for my people. To this city."

"So what?" Jasson turned, shocked, "Are you going to try and kill them?"

Harriett shuddered then smiled and said "Me? Never. I'd never let anything hurt them. But…we have to do this right. My mother keeps cats, but I'm no expert myself. I know a few things. For instance: This black and white cat is called a Tuxedo. Socializing is important for them, as is rapid responses…"

Jasson lay down on his bed and closed his eyes, feeling too heavy to stay up.

"Never mind," Harriett said, "I'll go through it with you all tomorrow. We'll need to feed them, and remember: Cats have small body language signs that are hard to notice. I'm going to bed."

Jasson nodded groggily, stomach full, and drifted off to sleep.