There’s No Way I Can Raise a Dragon Daughter

“Ugh…”

The duke pressed his throbbing head and suddenly opened the door.

He didn’t know how he had fallen asleep.

He distinctly thought he wouldn’t fall asleep and that his mind was clear, so he would definitely stay up all night.

When he collected himself, he found that he was waking from his slumber in the late afternoon.

“Julia. My head hurts; could you please bring me some herbal tea…”

Just as he was about to call out loudly to Julia, who must be somewhere in the mansion, he stopped speaking, feeling a sudden sensation of something caught in him.

Julia was gone.

As the memories of last night resurfaced, the duke’s mouth slowly opened.

“Did you cough, my lord?”

“What’s going on?”

“I tracked Julia’s escape route. She has now secured a house on the outskirts of the institution…”

“I don’t want to hear it. And do not assign surveillance to Julia ever again.”

“…Understood.”

The duke unintentionally showed some hostility toward the butler, who naturally approached to report.

The butler immediately bowed his head and left, noticing that the duke was in a bad mood.

He did not know exactly what happened last night.

Julia had packed all her belongings and left with Tia.

That was all the butler knew.

He wasn’t curious about the rest, either.

“Ugh.”

The duke pushed back his disheveled bangs and moved on.

It was suffocating.

Suffocating enough to suffocate him to death.

He thought he might feel better if he could get outside the mansion.

“My lord, your meal…”

“I don’t need it.”

“Shall I warm up the bathwater?”

“That’s not necessary either.”

Seeing the duke in a state they had never witnessed before, the maids all stopped working and hurried to check his complexion.

He always emerged from his bedroom looking neat and tidy.

Today, however, his hair was messy and he was wearing the same clothes he had worn out last night.

‘He must have fought with Julia.’

It wasn’t hard to guess what had happened.

It must be related to Julia, who suddenly entered the mansion last night, quickly gathered her things, and left with Tia and the foxes.

The woman with whom he had even arranged a betrothal had left home without warning.

The duke’s expression suggested that Julia had unilaterally demanded the dissolution of their engagement.

But even so…

“Sigh. Just do it right.”

“It’s obvious that he messed up again, let his lower half act carelessly, and hurt Julia.”

The looks directed at the duke were far from kind.

The maids knew of his past.

They understood how deeply the minor mistakes, which might have been insignificant to the duke, left great scars on Julia.

Even though they were unaware of the crimes he had committed in his dragon form, the current atmosphere reflected that much.

“I’m going to get some fresh air.”

Although the maids tried to hide their expressions, the duke perceived it all with his superhuman keen sight.

He could tell how they felt about him.

Yet, he couldn’t muster the thought of scolding the maids and fled the mansion as if escaping.

It felt strange.

In his own villa, there wasn’t a single friendly person around him.

All of the gazes directed at him seemed to berate him.

In reality, that wasn’t necessarily the case, but the heavy sense of guilt weighing down in the duke’s heart made every gaze seem hostile.

“…”

Creak.

When the door opened, the view inside the room was neat.

The wardrobe was all open, revealing its empty interior.

There was nothing left behind, as if all the odds and ends had been taken away or discarded.

The bedding was neatly arranged, piled in a single spot.

It seemed there was a strong will that she would never return again.

The duke closed the door again and exited the accommodation.

No one questioned why he entered the quarters where female employees stayed.

The duke slumped down onto the grass in the garden.

If he stayed like this, the foxes would usually run out from the house, panting, and cling to him.

But now there was no one.

No one approached the duke or spoke to him.

“Ah…”

As the surroundings grew quiet, the stifled gloomy thoughts began to fill his mind.

The guilt that he had buried deep within his chest started to crawl over his entire body.

‘Where did it all go wrong?’

And slowly, he began to retrace his memories.

What would have been the right thing to do?

Was there no way to reverse his mistakes?

Did a better ending exist than this?

He understood well that regretting now was meaningless and that it was too late.

Yet his mind couldn’t help but drift in that direction.

With each thought, his heart ached more, but he couldn’t stop.

It seemed he couldn’t endure unless he whipped himself with this guilt.

“Julia…”

He had experienced loss many times.

He had lost countless people who had faithfully served him.

Over the long years, he had met and parted ways with many people.

Each time, the duke would remember the faces of those whose names he could barely recall and honor their deaths.

Other dragons could not understand the duke and rejected him for such things.

Yet, the duke remained here, not relinquishing his title.

Since he was drawn by the blade of the leopard and had mingled with the short-lived races, he had never once left human society.

Thus, he thought he had grown accustomed to it.

He thought he had become numb to the separations and losses.

He thought, like humans, he could forget quickly.

But it seemed he could never forget Julia.

He believed that the feelings he had after committing acts driven solely by lust were simple love.

At first, he thought it stemmed from the responsibility of having made her pregnant.

Though he later added love to describe it, that alone didn’t fully explain everything.

He wouldn’t deceive or trick someone he truly loved.

“…Ah.”

Possessiveness.

That, in whole, explained it perfectly.

The feeling of conquest that came from having made the holy maiden, who couldn’t simply be touched by anyone, pregnant and taking her for himself.

A desire that was neither complex nor noble, but such a childish craving.

It led him to this moment because he was blinded by a desire far lower than the lowly beings he so despised.

“Ugh…”

He must have mentioned a house in the outskirts, hadn’t he?

He felt as though he could figure out which one it was.

He wanted to open his eyes right now and follow Julia’s footsteps.

He wanted to see how Tia was doing.

He wanted to see both of their faces.

But the duke hardly managed to open his eyes, instead only letting out a painful groan.

He couldn’t muster the courage to open his eyes.

What if Julia was smiling?

What if Tia looked cheerful?

What if both of them had left his side, and they seemed happy?

The worry surrounding the duke slowly wouldn’t dissipate.

‘No. Actually, I hope they are happy.’

Then even heavier concerns rushed in.

What if Julia was crying?

What if she was suffering?

What if Tia, who was always bright and full of laughter, had a grim look?

If he peeked and saw both of them looking unhappy, it would be even more painful.

Because of him.

Because of the mistakes he made.

Because he had deceived them in the hope of covering up that mistake.

It was evident that seeing how he had ruined both of their happiness would be much more tormenting.

It hurt in any direction he looked.

He wanted to see them, yet at the same time did not want to see them.

Now he recalled that Julia had once disliked how he watched her.

She had said it felt as though he were watching her every move.

‘Let’s pretend I’m not looking. I’ll let go.’

Julia, who had learned to handle miracles, was no longer powerless.

Tia was already strong enough to be beyond any adversary.

There was absolutely no need for him to worry.

If there were any worries, it would only be about the wounds he had inflicted.

And that worry was something the duke couldn’t resolve by himself.

Only time could resolve it.

And that too, only the time without the duke.

Only when Julia forgets the duke and meets new bonds will she begin to cover those wounds with memories.

How long would it take until then?

Julia easily accepts people as easily as she is hurt.

Even I, who have committed a grave sin, tried to accept her.

So it wouldn’t take too long.

She would soon forget me and smile again.

Even as he forced himself to think this way, the duke’s heart remained unsettled.

It should have been enough for Julia to be happy, yet the mere thought of her smiling beside another man made his heart pang.

It was all due to that damn possessiveness.

He blushed at the fact that he even dared to call it love, aware it was a lowly, primitive, and childish desire.

The duke soon came to terms with himself and bit his tongue.

“Ugh…”

With a sharp sensation, a metallic taste of blood spread in his mouth.

The stimulating scent of blood tickled his nose.

That smell and pain somewhat cleared his cluttered mind.

As that pain began to subside, the duke suddenly burst into a hollow laugh.

“Should I just die?”

He felt embarrassed at how lowly he had fallen.

Isn’t it natural for dragons to exit at this point?

Perhaps that was the way to atone to Julia.

He suddenly had that thought.

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