Worse Than A Demon? (Sasori x Demon Slayer)

Sasori sat in a meditation position, spreading his chakra across every inch he could reach, searching for any trace of Orochimaru.

'Nothing,' he thought, disappointment flashing in his eyes as he opened them. 'Could he already be dead?' Sasori stood up, still finding it hard to believe. Orochimaru, in his calculations, had survived for several millennia. Sasori doubted he'd die without a surefire way of returning.

Before he could dwell further, loud footsteps echoed from above—a man running across the rooftop, chains clinking, and other items shifting against each other. Sasori looked up, though he didn't need to, as he recognized the familiar figure landing on the floor in a dramatic pose that kicked up dust in all directions.

"Sasori! How have you been?" came the voice, energetic but with a hint of anxiety, as the figure used his hand to clear away the dust, revealing himself.

"Uzui," Sasori said as Uzui struck a dramatic pose.

"That's me! The one and only God of Festivals!" Uzui proclaimed loudly.

Sasori couldn't help but think Uzui's exaggerated poses seemed like something from an entirely different world with how... bizarre they were.

"God of Festivals, huh?" Sasori replied, tone slightly sarcastic.

Uzui's mannerisms reminded Sasori of Deidara, with his overly dramatic tone when talking about explosions.

"That's correct! Only someone as flashy as me could claim the title!" Uzui said, filled with utter confidence.

"Anyway! Sasori, I must request a favor from you," Uzui said, jumping straight to business.

Sasori raised an eyebrow in curiosity. "A favor?"

"Or... I could pay you to do it?" Uzui added, making Sasori even more curious.

"How much?" Sasori asked. Even though Sasori saved most of what he earned from the Corps, only spending on tool upgrades and occasional slices of pumpkin pie for Aki, he wouldn't mind some extra funds.

"I heard you're interested in some wisteria wood," Uzui said confidently, choosing his words carefully.

'How would he know about that? I didn't sense anyone when I was speaking to Shinobu about it. Did she tell him?' Sasori thought, frowning.

"Who told you?" Sasori asked directly.

"A very kind and flashy rat told me," Uzui replied honestly, causing Sasori's poker face to break for a moment.

"What...?" Sasori asked, seeking clarification.

"Ah! Don't worry about it. Anyway, I can get you some wisteria wood if you do something for me," Uzui said.

"I thought only the Corps master could authorize that," Sasori replied, making Uzui nod.

"That's true, but I have my ways," Uzui said with a wink.

"Are you planning to smuggle wisteria wood for me?" Sasori asked, his poker face slipping as he considered the oddness of smuggling wood.

"What? No! My heart and soul are dedicated to the Master—I wouldn't betray him like that," Uzui said, slightly taken aback by Sasori's unfazed tone. "But if I ask him, I believe he'd be willing to give you some."

"If he's willing, why would I waste my time doing a favor for it?" Sasori asked.

'Is he a businessman now?' Uzui thought, somewhat baffled.

"Well, getting it yourself could take months. But with me, you can have it right after completing my favor, which will probably only take a few days, a week at most," Uzui explained.

Sasori considered it. If Uzui's favor wasn't too much trouble, it would save Sasori from trying to acquire wisteria wood on his own. If it was too inconvenient, Sasori figured he could always just take some from where the Demon Slayer tests were held.

"Fine, what is it?" Sasori asked.

Uzui's eyes lit up. "You see, my darling wives and I live in a pretty isolated location. The closest village is a half-day's journey, at least," he said, watching for any reaction to the mention of his multiple wives. But Sasori either didn't care or didn't fully understand it, and from what Uzui knew of him, it was probably the former.

"My wives have noticed a demon lurking in the forest surrounding our home, but unfortunately, I have an important job coming up that'll keep me busy for a week," Uzui continued.

"So, you want me to hunt down this demon and kill it?" Sasori asked.

Uzui shook his head. "No, I don't want you hunting it down. I just need you to protect my wives, and if the demon shows up, kill it. If it doesn't, just stay on guard until I'm back. It's as simple as that.

"I suppose I can handle this mission of yours," Sasori agreed, making Uzui grin.

"Amazing!" Uzui shouted, tossing Sasori a rolled-up map, which Sasori caught with ease.

"This is a map to my humble abode. Make sure to keep my wives safe," Uzui said as Sasori gave a nod.

"How long do you think it'll take you to get there on your own? Or should I hire someone to escort you?" Uzui asked, noticing Sasori's annoyed look.

"I can get there on my own," Sasori answered, irritated that Uzui thought he needed an escort.

"Good to know. Well, good luck on your mission," Uzui said as Sasori turned to leave.

Once Sasori was out of sight, Uzui headed to the Butterfly Mansion. Time flew by, and soon it was time for the meeting.

Uzui made his way to the medical room in the Butterfly Mansion, where the meeting would be held. Sanemi and Iguro were recovering from injuries, and while Mitsuri was also hurt, Uzui had seen her meditating with Gyomei earlier, so he assumed she was alright.

With a dramatic flair, Uzui kicked open the doors to the medical room, causing them to nearly come off their hinges as he struck a pose in the center of the room.

"How do you do, my fellow Hashira? Your favorite, the flashiest, and most handsome Hashira has arrived!" Uzui announced with excitement and a hint of smugness.

The four Hashira in the room looked at him—two of them with annoyance and irritation. The owner of the doors he'd just nearly broken glared at him with a dangerously polite smile, while another looked at him with excitement.

"That was amazing, Uzui! You must teach me your poses!" Mitsuri said with renewed energy.

"I fucking hate him," both Iguro and Sanemi muttered simultaneously, glancing at each other in shared agreement.

Meanwhile, Shinobu said nothing, merely staring at her damaged doors.

As the group began talking, Tomioka poked his head into the room, glancing at the busted doors.

"Tomioka!" Uzui greeted him. "How are you doing?" Uzui asked, striking another pose while Mitsuri eagerly tried to mimic him.

Tomioka merely nodded at Uzui before stepping inside and taking a seat on another bed a bit away from the group.

Shinobu quietly stood up and left the room, though only Tomioka noticed, as the others were too entertained by Uzui's antics while he showed Mitsuri several unconventional poses.

Their playful scene continued until Gyomei and Muichiro entered.

"Greetings. It's good to see you're all in good health," Gyomei said, and the others greeted him in turn, even the usually reserved Tomioka.

"Can't say we're all in good health," Iguro grumbled, wincing as he nursed his broken ribs.

"I will pray for your recovery, Iguro," Gyomei promised, rubbing the prayer beads in his hands.

As Gyomei began to pray, Shinobu returned with three Kakushi. Two carried new doors, while the third brought a toolbox.

The Kakushi quickly replaced the damaged doors, working with impressive speed.

"Thank you," Shinobu said as the three Kakushi nodded and left.

"They work fast," Iguro observed as Gyomei and Muichiro took seats on the floor.

"Master will be arriving soon," another Kakushi announced before leaving.

The Hashira took their seats. Uzui joined Tomioka on his bed, making Tomioka scoot a bit away from him, while Mitsuri and Shinobu sat together on the bed that Gyomei and Muichiro were using to lean against as they sat on the floor.

The Hashira waited in silence.

A faint sound of something heavy being dragged echoed from the hallway. Moments later, a Kakushi opened the door, allowing Master Kagaya to enter, followed closely by Lady Amane, who held a folded piece of paper. Behind her, another Kakushi pushed a large blackboard into the center of the room, setting it down in front of the Hashira. He then sat cross-legged on the floor with several sheets of paper in front of him, pencil in hand, ready to document anything needed.

Master Kagaya and Lady Amane positioned themselves on either side of the blackboard.

"Good day, my children. I trust you are prepared to discuss the individual we've gathered to address?" Master Kagaya asked.

All the Hashira nodded, giving him their full attention.

Kagaya nodded toward Lady Amane, who responded with a gentle nod of her own. She unfolded the paper and, quite suddenly, slapped it against the blackboard with enough force to make the Hashira jump.

"My apologies," Lady Amane said, pulling her hand back. "The adhesive requires...a bit of force to stick," she explained.

The Hashira relaxed, though still somewhat taken aback by her sudden movement. As they shifted their attention to the paper, they recognized the youthful face sketched on it.

"Why the hell are we talking about him?" Iguro asked, frowning.

"Are you really questioning the need to discuss him?" Uzui replied, raising an eyebrow.

Iguro looked like he was about to object but lowered his finger, muttering, "I just assumed we'd be talking about... Rengoku..."

The others heard him clearly, and Sanemi gave a nod of agreement. "Yeah. Why aren't we discussing Rengoku?"

"I'm afraid there's little we can address concerning Kyujuro's passing," Master Kagaya explained.

Silence fell over the room.

"That's a load of bullshit," Sanemi retorted, clearly upset.

The others looked at him, surprised. "Sanemi, watch your tone with the Master," Giyu warned, his gaze sharp.

"Don't act all high and mighty, you bastard!" Sanemi shouted at him. "Rengoku was our comrade, some of yours friend! The least we can get is a date for his funeral!"

"I'm afraid Kyujuro's father has requested we not attend his funeral," Master Kagaya said, leaving the Hashira stunned.

"Isn't this meeting just full of surprises," Muichiro muttered.

"What do you mean he doesn't want us there?" Mitsuri asked, looking both hurt and confused.

"To hell with that! We should go anyway. That old man can't stop us if we decide to show up," Sanemi declared.

"You should respect him. He was a former Hashira, and Rengoku is his son," Gyomei said calmly.

"Gyomei, do I look like I give a shit?" Sanemi shot back, though he quickly regretted his choice of words.

Gyomei turned his head in Sanemi's direction, his blind eyes expressionless but with a flicker of disappointment.

Sanemi's face softened. "My apologies... I let my anger get the better of me," he murmured, bowing his head respectfully.

Gyomei offered a small, forgiving smile. "It's fine, Sanemi. Perhaps you should join Mitsuri and me in meditation. It may help you manage your anger."

Sanemi shook his head, but Mitsuri chimed in, "No, it's alright. You're welcome to join."

Surprised, Sanemi nodded slowly.

Master Kagaya clapped his hands lightly. "Now that's settled, let's return to the topic at hand."

Gyomei raised his hand. "I'm afraid I am unfamiliar with the individual we're discussing."

Lady Amane resisted the urge to sigh, realizing she'd forgotten to explain for Gyomei's sake.

"It's the 'puppet man,'" Muichiro said.

Gyomei sat in silent thought for a moment before recalling, "Ah, yes. The man with the puppets at the festival. You were quite entertained by him."

"Wait—festival? What festival? Never mind, I don't care. I mean, the 'puppet man,'" Muichiro replied.

Gyomei turned to the others. "Could someone explain further?"

"It's Sasori," Shinobu clarified simply.

Gyomei remained silent, clearly still drawing a blank.

"For crying out loud, Gyomei! It's the redhead who uses puppets to kill demons," Sanemi said impatiently. "Remember? He helped you and Muichiro take down that Lower Moon on the beach?"

"Ah, yes. The veteran," Gyomei nodded, now recalling Sasori.

The Hashira exchanged raised eyebrows, all except for Uzui.

"I don't think we're talking about the same person," Mitsuri said uncertainly.

"No, I remember clearly. He helped us kill Lower Four, and I recall Shinobu attempting to take a sample of his blood." Gyomei added.

"Yep, he's thinking of the right person," Shinobu confirmed.

"'Veteran'? He's in his thirties. I doubt he's old enough to have fought in any war," Iguro commented, surprised.

Gyomei's brow furrowed slightly.

"Actually, he might be," Uzui interjected, pulling out a book and placing it on the bed.

Giyu, closest to him, read the title: "Puppeteering Through the Ages."

"Yep. Read page 36 line 9." Uzui instructed as Muichiro flipped to the correct page and began to read.

"Puppeteering is a skill rarely mastered or utilized by shinobi. One of the few shinobi who achieved mastery over puppeteering also earned the infamous title of 'the most wanted puppeteer' to emerge from the Hidden Sand Village. He was given the name 'Sasori of the Red Sand' due to his brutal efficiency in battle, often leaving the battlefield drenched in the blood of his enemies," Muichiro read aloud, his voice steady despite the ominous content.

"That's... concerning," Iguro muttered.

"More than concerning. Apparently, that book is about 13,000 years old," Uzui added.

"This has to be a coincidence, right?" Mitsuri asked, looking unsettled.

"Muichiro, continue," Gyomei requested.

"Sasori of the Red Sand, shortly after earning his title, betrayed his village by assassinating their Kage. After a tumultuous 15 years, he was ultimately slain in combat," Muichiro read aloud, his tone laced with intrigue.

"Oh, so it's not him, then?" Sanemi asked.

Uzui shrugged. "It's the only recorded account of someone named Sasori who was a puppeteer."

Shinobu, deep in thought, bit her lip.

"You look like you have something to share, Shinobu," Iguro observed, leaning against the bed frame.

After a moment of hesitation, Shinobu spoke. "I... don't believe he's human."

"A demon, then?" Mitsuri asked, looking perplexed.

"No, not human or demon," Shinobu corrected.

"HMMM. Could it be? Maybe he's a fucking magician," Sanemi said sarcastically.

Gyomei ignored Sanemi's comment. "What do you mean he's neither?"

Giyu asked in a casual tone, "Did you find something interesting while you were... observing him while he was changing?"

The room fell silent as the other Hashira processed his words.

"What?" Sanemi asked, his expression caught between confusion and disbelief.

Shinobu's face turned crimson. "Is she going through puberty?" Muichiro asked, tilting his head in genuine curiosity.

Mitsuri leaned toward Shinobu, her voice barely above a whisper. "Was he wearing pants?" she asked, wide-eyed.

Shinobu groaned, covering her face with both hands in embarrassment. "I wasn't peeping," she muttered defensively.

Without warning, Uzui splashed a cup of water over her head.

"Uzui, what the hell?!" Shinobu yelped, looking utterly bewildered.

"Just trying to snap you back to reality," Uzui replied with a smirk, leaning back as if he had done nothing unusual.

"Wait, hold on!" Sanemi interrupted, pointing an accusatory finger at Shinobu. "Shinobu, we don't care if you were peeping—"

"Pretty sure most of us do care, but go on," Iguro interjected dryly.

Shinobu muttered something incoherent, her head sinking lower.

"But seriously," Sanemi continued, ignoring the tension, "what the hell did you see that made you think this guy isn't human?"

Taking a deep breath to calm herself, Shinobu straightened her posture. "First of all, I wasn't peeping," she said firmly, directing her gaze toward Giyu.

"Shinobu, what kind of dictionary are you using? Because I'm fairly certain looking at someone while they're changing without their consent is called peeping," Giyu replied flatly, unbothered.

"Oh, please," Shinobu shot back, irritation creeping into her voice. "I looked because it's suspicious, isn't it? He comes out of every battle unscathed—not a drop of blood, not even a broken bone."

Most of the Hashira nodded, acknowledging her point.

"Yes. I suppose you have a point..." Iguro said. "And also his body, like... weird." Shinobu tried to explain, but it was hard to find the right words.

"Like...How weird?" Uzui asked. 

Shinobu hesitated, trying to find the right words. "It's like... his body isn't made of flesh. it looked—like some sort of machine."

The room fell silent, each Hashira processing the odd description.

"Shinobu..." Iguro started, skepticism clear in his voice, "That doesn't sound physically possible."

"I know it's hard to believe," Shinobu admitted, her tone firm. "But there was something else. On his chest, I saw this... circular thing, like a core. It had the kanji for 'kaku.'"

At her words, Sanemi froze. His eyes widened as if he had just achieved omniscients.

"Holy. Shit" Sanemi muttered. He immediately reached beneath his bed and pulled out a bag, rummaging through it with frantic energy.

The other Hashira exchanged confused glances as Sanemi continued his frenzied search.

"Found it!" Sanemi exclaimed triumphantly, holding up a piece of paper. He shoved it toward Shinobu, his expression electric with excitement.

"Like this?" he asked, revealing a detailed sketch of a peculiar circular object. The drawing depicted what could only be described as a black cylindrical object with what seemed to be tree roots coming out of it. It had the Kanji for "Kaku"

The room fell silent again, every eye now fixed on the drawing. the cylindrical object drawn on the paper.