The Paradox of E

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1. The Emergency Meeting

E stood in the void. Arms crossed. Expression neutral.

Reality sat across from him, looking guilty.

Bob was also there, but nobody had invited him.

"Alright," E said, tapping his fingers against his arm. "Who broke the universe this time?"

Reality whistled innocently.

Bob pointed at Reality.

"You absolute traitor." Reality glared at him.

[SYSTEM ANNOUNCEMENT: EMERGENCY UNIVERSE PATCH INCOMING.]

"Oh, fantastic." E sighed. "What did you do?"

Reality shrugged. "Nothing major. Just… added microtransactions?"

E stared.

Bob screamed.

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2. Introducing the Pay-to-Exist System

A giant, glowing store menu appeared in the sky.

[WELCOME TO THE LIFE PREMIUM SHOP!]

Basic Existence: FREE (Limited Features)

Happiness Booster: $9.99

Luck Upgrade: $29.99

Villain Privilege Pack: $99.99

"Skip Suffering" DLC: Sold Out

E looked at Reality.

"Are you out of your mind?"

Reality scoffed.

"Do you know how expensive it is to keep existence running? Energy bills are insane."

Bob clicked on "Happiness Booster."

[TRANSACTION FAILED: INSUFFICIENT SOUL CURRENCY.]

Bob cried.

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3. The Developer Has Entered the Server

"Alright, this is getting ridiculous."

E pulled out a keyboard that materialized from nowhere.

Bob gasped.

"Wait. No. That's—"

E typed one line of code.

[COMMAND INPUT: /rollback reality -version 28.0]

The world glitched.

Reality panicked.

"WAIT, YOU CAN'T JUST—"

[ROLLBACK COMPLETE.]

The Life Premium Shop vanished.

Bob cheered.

Reality looked defeated.

"Do you have any idea how much money we just lost?"

E smirked.

"I consider it a necessary bug fix."

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4. The Customer Service Ticket from Hell

Just then, a massive notification appeared.

[INCOMING SUPPORT REQUEST – HIGH PRIORITY]

E clicked it.

A message popped up.

SUPPORT TICKET #0001 – FROM: "GOD"]

"Excuse me. Who authorized a rollback of my universe?"

Reality turned pale.

Bob fainted.

E grinned.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't the final boss."

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